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Husband addicted to porn

(57 Posts)
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AliceAnne Thu 27-Feb-20 12:19:44

My OH is 78 years old and is partially disabled. I am his carer.
For the last few months he has been visiting porn sites on the internet and spends several hours a day oggling at ladies showing off their 'bits'. He often stays up into the early hours looking at this stuff.
He is on certain dating sites and gets hundreds of e.mails in every day, again from females flaunting their wares.
Yesterday I discovered that he has been writing to one of them telling her about himself and giving his real name, photograph etc and I am afraid he is leaving himself open to blackmail.
Also I discovered that he has been filming himself, on a camcorder not online - masturbating.

I am disgusted with his behaviour.
Any suggestions as to the way forward would be welcome. Incidentally I am a lot younger than him and still working.

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Philippa60 Fri 28-Feb-20 14:19:24

Put on one of the anti-porn systems like "Net Nanny" and block his access to these kind of sites!

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endlessstrife Fri 28-Feb-20 16:06:01

I’m concerned that if you cut off access to these sites, he may become more aggressive towards you. You really need to speak to your GP first, then work quietly in the background, protecting your finances etc.

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Tangerine Fri 28-Feb-20 17:57:09

I think you need some professional advice. Perhaps try and cut of his access to these sites.

Parkinson's and Dementia often cause men to behave inappropriately in various ways, including sexual comments and behaviours.

Could you mention it to his Dr?

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Luckygirl Fri 28-Feb-20 18:43:52

I do not think that tinkering with the computer system is the way to go.

The man is ill - there are ways of alleviating this, as I have explained upthread. Please do not reject these - it really is the only way forward. This is so common in PD and needs to be (and can be) dealt with.

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Gr8dame Sun 12-Apr-20 09:21:40

So sorry to read of your problems AliceAnne particularly as I am experiencing exactly the same problems except for the fact that we own our house jointly! I have 2 daughters and grandchildren who live miles away and I love them dearly but over the years he has constantly undermined me and I am terrified that if I leave him they will take his side and I will see them even less than I do now. I am not very clever with computers and wouldn’t know how to control the internet access but wish I could. Any advice please?

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timetogo2016 Sun 12-Apr-20 14:09:37

Aggie and esspee are spot on with their firs post.
Men like that give me the creeps.

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