Is my husband unreasonable

I do that too Baggs,a simple solution is to move anything he leaves around and put it on his side of the bed.
And tbh,i think you may be looking for problems as you seem unhappy with him and he may do what he does as he feels the same,basicaly,you are both p...ing each other off.

grannymags, he sounds really annoying - but none of these things are hanging offences! Try laughing, if these are your only problems - you are truly blessed (I do so miss my awkward, thoughtless, clumsy OH).

(Is there such a creature as a 'reasonable' husband? I tried two - but reasonable was beyond them.)

I feel your pain. I’ve had 45 years of marriage, most good but DH has such an angry streak that after such a long time it is wearing me down. The charming, engaging witty side is kept for family and friends.

It's all part of having a relationship, ups and down.
It's not like when you are first married, you are both individuals you have your likes and dislikes like everyone.
I continually ask my hubby not to leave his shoes in the hall, he just ignores me and carries on as usual. He also doesn't do his share of the chores, etc etc I in turn annoy him on many points.
We both have our own interests and also have things we like to do together.
It all depends on what you can put up with and are you prepared to go it alone.
There are things I wouldn't put up with, adultery, gambling and spending all our income. I wouldn't like him smoking there again I wouldn't leave him for that.
If you can't stand the man and only you know that, think very carefully about leaving. If you do choose to leave make sure you have considered everything.
I have lots of interests so am very happy but there are times when I swear and shout.
52 years on we are still together, what I would say is let things go, you'll be worrying yourself sick about something and he might not even give it a second thought,
Life can be short stop thinking about his eccentricities and get on with your day.

Surely it's our rather than my living room or whatever

I swap dirty shoes and plugged in power tools for a cheater anytime

lucky to have a husband Why? they are not a necessity in life, and, as my mother used to say 'better happily single, than unhappily married.'

If you are widowed after a long happy marriage, that is a real loss. I nearly lost DH last winter, I know the fear. But just having a husband, any husband, well, I would amend my mothers saying and say, better unhappily single than unhappily married.

This lady's husband does sound thoughtless, but then I am married to a man who has never knowingly put anything away or quite shut a door or drawer in his whole life, even his mother said 'born in a barn, if she didn't know better'. He has a great big 30ft x 8ft shed in the garden, but does all his DIY in the house, usually the kitchen and we have tool chargers everywhere.

Whether your DH is being unreasonable or not, rather depends on how you feel about him at the moment, I have learned to live with DH, reckoning on balance the pros exceed the cons, you may feel differently

grannymags, none of the 'offences' mentioned seem serious - just minor annoyances.

You can easily keep him out of your car (assuming he has his own) and feel free to throw muddy shoes straight outside (I'd do that often). If he charged things in the kitchen, I bet you'd be equally annoyed, so where is a convenient place?

It seems that you view the living space as your territory - that's the problem. Maybe divide it into 'his' and 'her' zones?

I agree that this poster doesn’t have to be “lucky to have a husband”. However what I do think is that if he drives her so mad and the marriage is rocky she should bite the bullet and live in her own.
Nowhere does she say “ but I still love him”.

After 58 years of marriage, be certain that all husbands and wives are unreasonable, accidentally, or deliberately, at times.
Part of the variety of life!

…I’m married to a man who has never knowingly put anything away or quite shut a door or drawer in his whole life….

My husband has difficulty shutting cupboards and drawers too. He also brings all his tools into the kitchen and leaves them there even when the job he was doing is complete.

Like you Monica I feel on balance that the pros outweigh the cons, though at times I do feel the opposite. Especially when he goes into a mood following me getting cross about said tools remaining in the kitchen for several weeks. It’s all part of the ups and downs of marriage.

You say "my living room carpet" that does tell a lot about how you see things.

I think after 45 years he won’t be changing anytime soon, I wouldn’t like power tools charging on our living room carpet, especially if dirty, dirty shoes in the hall would be moved to the porch,

I’ve just read this out to my DH and he laughed. I told him not to get any ideas! Seriously why not charge the power tools in the garage or shed? Dirty golf shoes the same.