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My daughter is distancing from me

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Ffoxglove Fri 22-Apr-22 22:20:09

My daughter is withdrawing communication.
We went through a terrible time with her dad and I divorced 2 years ago.
We are/were very close. She recently had a panic attack and blamed me because she thought I can't die mum only has me. It's true just me and her and I have no other family. She resents me for this, says for needs therapy.
I usually speak each day now for over a week she barely messaged me.
I always used to about her safety and would ask her to message me if on a long journey, that kind of thing. She interprets this as being clingy.
I don't know what to do. I can't help worrying about her sometimes but she's treating me like she's punishing me for caring.
I'm so hurt because I love her so much.

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Fennel Thu 28-Apr-22 21:54:56

Ffoxglove your story is similar to mine but TG she hasn't turned away.
But the main reult is that she hasn't been able to trust relationships with men.
Until 10 years ago when she met her current partner, they're both in their 50s. I think he has similar family conflicts.
When their relationship started I was upset , irrationally, because I knew I was losing my baby.Now TG they are so close and supportive of eachother.
But I have learnd how to control my feelings , and my tongue.

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Allsorts Sat 30-Apr-22 23:09:31

You are talking about how all this affects you, think about his is affecting hermm what about letting her grow in her own way. She needs friends her own age and hopefully one day a partner. Mothers Day was only a month ago when she wrote you an emotional letter. I would try to see this mutual dependency as not really helping your daughter, quite the reverse. If she feels smothered and guilty not being in daily touch you will create more distance. I'm not sure how old she is but she sounds very young.

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