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husband doesn't like my baking...

(130 Posts)
spabbygirl Thu 09-Mar-23 11:24:35

I retired last yr 2 yrs before husband & thought I'd take up bread & cake baking & imagined myself loading up the table with all sorts of baked goodies that would be eagerly scoffed by my husband, we never get visitors as kids live to far away. But I'm not a good cook and lots of my sourdough has not been good & during a family meal out recently when I was considering buying a new sourdough book (I love books) he winced and said I cook unusual different things that he didn't always like. I knew this cos he's just walked past so many bakes I've made & never eaten them & they get chucked out. I do add part wholemeal flour and less sugar cos it's better for my IBS which I have painstainkenly explained to him many times but I am so upset about it. I only want to just cook him lemon drizzle cake with lashings of sugar & white flour cos it's not good for me, though I do bake his stuff sometimes & I just feel that all my good intentions are rejected. I have been poorly & low lately & the timing isn't good but now I'm really hurt. am I overreacting????

Tenko Mon 13-Mar-23 15:54:41

I don’t get this compulsion with baking. I very rarely bake , whether it’s cakes or bread . Mostly due to high fat and sugar content and I rarely eat them. Health and diet is so important as you get older .
I feel from your post that you need a hobby or an interest . Which I totally get . I retired in June last year and made the decision to try new things . I started wild swimming, although not in the winter ( I’m not that hardcore yet) . I volunteer in a charity shop and joined a litter picking group. I do yoga twice a week as well . So do things to please yourself not your husband. With your IBS in mind you could do a course on nutrition.
Good luck

Blackcat3 Mon 13-Mar-23 21:48:05

Perhaps he doesn’t like baked goods! Tinkering with recipes when you don’t understand them is never going to yield good results….same for leaving out or swapping ingredients…..if you want him to eat something just make him a cake….you don’t have to eat it…then make yourself something you can eat.

NotANana Tue 14-Mar-23 11:15:45

I once painted a wall in our first home, while the newly-acquired DH was out. (It needed doing, and we were gradually doing up our first home...)
When he returned, he criticised it.
I have NEVER (and I mean never, in the 44 years which have elapsed since) painted a wall.

Spabbygirl, you say that you took up baking, and that you are not a good cook. You also mention swapping out some ingredients for others.
I suggest that the best way to improve at anything, is to begin by doing it by the book. Once you have worked out how the magic happens, and what the finished results should taste like, and how ingredients work with each other, and got reasonably reliable results, THEN you can begin to make subtle tweaks so that you bakes taste like they should.

And if your DH still doesn't appreciate your cooking, it is because either he really doesn't like sweet things, or he is a p****k. You decide.....

spabbygirl Sun 19-Mar-23 14:12:15

thanks for that all, there are some really good recipes in Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall's book comfort food where he explains the health benefits & he has adapted recipes with less sugar & 50% brown flour finely milled & I think they are great. I just feel so lousy, I tried so hard! But yes I need to get out and do something else so I've offered to help at local national trust houses. I do admit husband is daft and unhelpful, but never mind. Thanks all