Am I Being Unreasonable in missing my close friend

Keep busy - go out, do things - there will be someone on their own too just waiting to form a friend in you ! 😘

It always makes me sad when I read on here the question 'AIBU for my feelings?' Feelings are never unreasonable - they are what they are - feelings, and we should never repress them. However, what we actually decide to do is a different matter, and if you make your resentment clear to your friend you could damage the relationship. That happened to me, I met my (now) husband and some friends have now rejected me, because they thought I rejected them. This made me very sad for a while, because I never meant to reject anyone, and in all fairness it was not made clear to me at the time that anyone was needing me, in my absence. I fell in love and everything was a whirl, nothing seemed the same, life was magical. Now it's settled down and though I love my husband he is most certainly NOT 'perfect' or magical! In a way I wish I could still be close to these two friends, who were once my closest, but that is seemingly not on the menu. It's funny but as time passes I realise that maybe it was for the best, for I have moved on and now have other friends. It's hard for you but I think it will be by far the best thing to get on with stuff on your own for a while, make new friends (maybe keep your eyes out for a man of your own?) and in time your friend will need you again - it's just the way it goes. Give her her time of magic, life's too short not to.

There are lots of reasons why the balance of friendships shift - the arrival of grandchildren, retirements and bereavements, age and illness etc. I would urge you to try to build a relationship with Mr. Perfect too, so that you can sometimes do things altogether, and no one is left out. I remarried 9 years ago and my husband enjoys occasional outings with myself and single female friends or my adult daughters. And they enjoy some male company too. He has got to know some of the other members of their families over time, at family events. Everyone’s circle has widened a little. I can see how hard it is, but try to see this as an opportunity, not a loss. Things will find a new balance in time, if you can be patient and remain the loving and caring friend you have clearly been for a long time.

Echoing alot of what has been said already. It’s maybe worth pointing out , you are going through a bereavement of sorts. You feel like you have lost your friend - you haven’t but the loss is real and the realisation the future you might have imagined has changed . Hold her in your heart and welcome any communication from her . Be kind to yourself and take care x

her head is probably in the love mist, as we know ,it will end! find some new friends ,she may come back to you, that is if you want her to return?

I presume you also feel angry? I ask that as I do in the following circumstances
old friends but we lived several miles away from each other. We just used to email each other on a regular basis. She contacted me to ask if we could meet up in person, I replied yes but suggested a meeting point midway. Since then no contact and no replies to my emails . My husband thinks she has ignored me as I did not suggest she stay for a few nights in our house. A lot of people think that living in Devon means you are automatically by the sea and not inland. We no longer live in Devon and may that also be the reason for complete silence over 6 months. ? No longer a "free holiday"?

The other thing I would point out is that nothing is really permanent in this life , and even more so in older age. So while she is in the first flush of this new relationship, this man may seem like her "Mr Perfect" , but he may turn out not to be at all . In which case your friend may very well end up deciding to be single again - or he could have a heart attack and die - or be killed in an accident, anything might happen. Men come and go for all sorts of reasons , but good friends are always valuable!! Never forget your worth 💕

This happened to me, I wasn’t dumped for a bloke, but for newer friends and activities which took priority over anything friend & I had organised. I realised I was being too accommodating to changes of plan, giving her the idea it was no big deal. So if she contacted me to cancel an arrangement because something more exciting had cropped up, I’d say I understood, but I couldn’t commit to another arrangement and, as she seemed really busy, perhaps we should wait until she had a bit more time.

Of course, your friend is going to be over the moon if she’s met a new love, but she will still need your friendship when the novelty wears off!