Later life dating

If you want to walk and they can't - yes.

If you are on a dating site, you are obviously looking for someone compatible to spend time with. If they do not or cannot do the activities you enjoy you are not being unreasonable. That is the point of a dating site.

I think there are not many men interested in walking and dancing, we walk modest distances but honestly I can’t remember the last time we danced properly - although I enjoy dancing, a jig around after a wedding is the only opportunity we’ve had.
Ballroom dancing is really not popular with men of any age, those that are have an abundant supply of ladies at dancing clubs.

There are plenty of men reasonably fit in their 60s, you have to decide if dancing gets priority over companionship.

Unfortunately most "eligible" men are looking for younger women. So, a man of 65 or 70 with his own home who is financially secure and with no serious health issues (yet), would be expecting to attract a woman of around 50.

Please also bear in mind OP that a lot of men on older dating sites are looking for someone to nurse them in their old age. It really is a thing.

flappergirl

Unfortunately most "eligible" men are looking for younger women. So, a man of 65 or 70 with his own home who is financially secure and with no serious health issues (yet), would be expecting to attract a woman of around 50.

Please also bear in mind OP that a lot of men on older dating sites are looking for someone to nurse them in their old age. It really is a thing.

You would be surprised, mostly younger yes but that applies to all age groups, but it’s more important to be compatible and enjoy the same activities because as you get older you will be spending more time together.

Dating is harder for women several of my friends have been widowed or divorced in the last 5 yrs, they are not interested in a relationship.

I did my share of it but found these truths: men lie about their height and women lie about their weight, everyone uses the most flattering photo which looks nothing like them in real life, or rarely.
It is a mirage created for and by people who like the superficial things in life. If that's you, you may get lucky. Otherwise, you will get hurt.
This is why I and many other women have given up.

Do you want a relationship or do you want a dance partner?

I would say don't write them off if they don't like walking/ dancing. You may meet a walker / dancer who is totally unsuitable in every other way!!! If you simply want a dance partner join a dance class / club. We have been married over 50 years , have very different likes - it has worked for us ! Keep searching, be careful and be a little more flexible. Who knows you may meet a non dancer you can convert! Good luck.

Your best bet would be to join a local walking group or try one of the online sites that are specifically for people who enjoy TGO. Outdoor Duo is a site I used in the (distant) past and met some really nice people. I have no commerical affiliation to it.

I think some men (and women) take a scattergun approach to dating because, let’s face it, we can sometimes fall for the unexpected, someone with whom we don’t really have that much in common. That can seem fine in the first flush but tensions soon creep in if one or both find themselves having to compromise more than they are comfortable with.

l agree with keeping quiets comments. I find it very hard to trust people so l know it wouldn't be for me.
I was married for 43 years, DH died just over a year ago. He told me during the time he was ill to find happiness with someone else.
I did, l got another rescue dog, Toby.

I was reluctantly persuaded by DD to give online dating a try, so signed up for the minimum period. Ideally it should be the perfect platform to meet like minded people …. However …. It attracts dishonest people with ulterior motives, and we’ve all read the horror stories in the paper. I “luckily” had quite a lot of men click on my profile, but visually, none appealed to me. DD told me to “think outside my box” 🤣 So I did and clicked on a retired business man who looked quite decent. After a few back and forth emails, he was boring me rigid, bowls club secretary etc ….. each to their own. When I politely bowed out of the conversation, he told me to think seriously about whether I even have time in my life for a relationship ! I had told him about my family, friends, travelling etc. I thought it was a very stupid comment, as when single, how lucky are you to have friends, family and interests to fill your life up with …. So I pointed this out to him and reminded him that life dosent come knocking on your door, you have to go out and grab it.
The 2nd man I started a chat with, within 2 days he had started inappropriate innuendo, and even had the audacity to ask me if he could come round to my house ! Given the guidelines laid out for internet dating, I was angry that he thought it was acceptable to be invite himself round, and clearly not a thought for me inviting a total stranger round. Needless to say, after my 6 months was up I was quite relieved 🤣

See if you can find a blues club in your area. In my experience they are full of men of A Certain Age who love music. They tend to outnumber the women there so who knows - there might be someone.

Not sure about blues, I met my dearest in the bar at the local Rugby club, quite a few single ladies “take an interest” in Rugby

I'm 67. I met DH on a dating site in 2018 and we married three years ago. He's incredibly fit, and enjoys dancing.

If I was looking for somebody, I’d take up golf. That’s where all the active single men I know spend their time, you’d be guaranteed to meet at least two or three different people every time you stay in the clubhouse for a drink after a round (and they don’t tend to be the ones looking for a nursemaid).

How lovely to hear of a happy ending pen.
My experience of the world of online dating is limited to a good friend.
Shamefully I have to confess that we had much laughter as she regaled us with some of her er ...interesting encounters on the dating front line.

I'm not looking for a 24/7 relationship. I would like a fellow with whom to go to the theatre, sports events, etc. and out for dinner [dutch] once in a while.

On the face of it any two people might look totally unsuited but I wouldn’t take that as a sign that others are not right for us. Hobbies can be enjoyed with anyone. Being in a living space and day to day things in a harmonious way is far more important. Actually essential.
If you think they look nice and or interesting give it a chance. It’s really hard to find a good fit at any age and especially as we get older. The word compromise comes to mind.. and that works both ways. The couch potato may have given up a bit and just waiting for someone like you to get them motivated again. There will no doubt be aspects of you that they might wish were different.

Having said all that I hear you and there does need to be enough to work with. If the person is nice enough try dating a few times before writing them off.

Good luck. Many older people have fallen in love again. I hope you do too!

I was approached on a dating site by a guy who l thought was interesting and worth meeting. I was a little put off by his lack of height (5ft 6). How pleasantly surprised l was when he turned out to be 5ft 11. It was a typo on his part. We are married now and l would still have married him had he been 5ft 6 as he's an absolute gem.

OldFrill

I was approached on a dating site by a guy who l thought was interesting and worth meeting. I was a little put off by his lack of height (5ft 6). How pleasantly surprised l was when he turned out to be 5ft 11. It was a typo on his part. We are married now and l would still have married him had he been 5ft 6 as he's an absolute gem.

What a lovely post!

I wouldn't bother with online stuff. A lot of men on there are undesirable one way or another. I haven't done it myself but a friend has and she had some awful experiences. Why not just get out to meet people? One of my friends met her partner by chatting on a park bench. Another met her partner when she was dog-walking and is now married to him. Another friend met someone when she joined a walking group. There are people of all ages doing all sorts of hobbies. Find what you enjoy and give it a go. This is where you are more likely to meet someone suitable to yourself.

No, of course you are not unreasonable. You have stated your interests clearly. If a man whose principal interest is stamp-collecting, playing with model trains or watching TV contacts you, without your having indicated that any of these pursuits interest you, and he is not interested in walking or dancing. what on earth was he thinking about?

When my ex husband traded me in for a younger model I initially dabbled with online dating sites. Unfortunately most of the men seemed only interested in one thing! There was one who seemed nice who suggested meeting up, but I was nervous. I waited a while before agreeing to meet, but by then he'd met someone else and said it wouldn't be appropriate as he was seeing someone else. Clearly he was one of the decent ones. It's quite a few years ago now and I soon realised I was able to be self sufficient so I stopped looking for a new man. I've remained single but have a full and busy life. I'm a member of a 'simply walk' group where I've met people of both sexes. Some of us get together and go out for a meal together occasionally. None of the group is romantically involved but we enjoy each other's company on these occasions. I did have a male friend with whom I sometimes attended quiz nights and other social events but his job moved and he now lives at the other end of the country. Since becoming a granny I find I've got more than enough to keep me busy and really don't need dating.
Joining a group of like minded people is the way to go. I expect there are plenty walking groups everywhere at a level to suit you. You may not meet the man of your dreams but are sure to find friendship and companionship.

Your not being unreadable, you would end up being a carer - not what you want.