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Dear gransnet

(172 Posts)
soontobe Fri 29-May-15 10:32:31

I would like some advice please.

On some threads, I am asked question after question after question etc[plus a couple of not so nice comments] about what I have posted.

At what point should I refuse to answer any more posts, even if they are incorrect about me or someone has got the wrong end of the stick about something I have posted.

I know I dont have to answer, but I dont like misconceptions about what I have posted. Plus no matter how many posts I answer, there are still more questions. I am actually quite happy to answer them. But is that ok with gransnet ok?
[Any bad feeling on a thread about me,I can more than deal with and I dont have a problem with]

I think this happens to other posters as well, but maybe they dont have quite as many questions asked of them as I do.

soontobe Fri 29-May-15 10:34:40

I know there are not allowed to be threads about a thread.

This is a strategic[if that is the right word] question.

annsixty Fri 29-May-15 10:40:53

I am not "gransnet" but I think when you say you are leaving the thread you should do just that.You are perpetuating the argument.
I started a contentious thread recently and when I realised I just said I was leaving the thread and I took no further part.A saying involving stop digging springs to my mind.

Anne58 Fri 29-May-15 10:43:41

Oh dear. confused I have a feeling that this will not end well.

Anne58 Fri 29-May-15 10:45:46

As Confucius once said "If you see someone with a can of worms, don't hand them a tin opener."

Ana Fri 29-May-15 10:45:50

You can't seriously be expecting GNHQ to answer your OP, soontobe, surely? You're just inviting more responses from those who are mystified by your sometimes rather strange attitude on various threads.

whenim64 Fri 29-May-15 10:48:32

You're being disingenuous soon. Just join in the threads without trying to railroad the OP or turning it all back to you.

Reminds me of that jokey comment 'that's enough of me talking about me - what do you want to ask me about me?' (Note - no 'grin' emoticon!)

soontobe Fri 29-May-15 10:53:32

It probably wont end well phoenix. But the situation of me answering and answering and anwsering questions, sometimes with some jokey banter from posters added in, happens from time to time. so I think it is time the situation is sorted.

If it is ok with gransnet, then there is no problem.

Anne58 Fri 29-May-15 11:00:30

I will try to make this my last post on this thread, but can't guarantee it,

so I think it is time the situation is sorted

I don't think there is a "situation" (as you call it!)

All that needs to be done is to walk away from the thread whenever you (that's the general "you") feel it's the sensible option. If you choose to stay, then stay.

soontobe Fri 29-May-15 11:03:15

Thank you phoenix.
As I have begun to realise, I dont think there likely to be a gransnet HQ problem at all.

Elegran Fri 29-May-15 11:04:17

So don't answer. No-one has thumbscrews on you to make you reply.

If you don't like the question, and you don't want to be drawn into more on the subject, don't even look at that thread again, then you won't know what the question was.

It may surprise you to hear this, but no-one will even notice that you have not replied. The conversation will move on. Other people do it all the time, and they hold back from commenting when someone says something stupid, too.

There is no law that says you will be thrown in jail for not answering a question you don't like - or even a question you can't be bothered answering.You don't have to go and find out the right answer - it is not an exam. All replies are voluntary. You don't even have to say "I am not answering that" Just go and do something else.

There. You now have permission to say nowt! does that make you feel better?

annodomini Fri 29-May-15 11:06:11

If I were you, soon, I'd take a little break from gransnet if it is so upsetting for you. Then come back and start afresh. smile

LucyGransnet (GNHQ) Fri 29-May-15 11:09:12

Hi soontobe - please refer to our guidelines if you're unsure about whether your posts are breaking any of our rules:

In terms of answering or not answering questions on a thread - that's a personal choice that we'll leave down to you, but it's perfectly acceptable to simply leave a thread that you no longer want to contribute to.

Anya Fri 29-May-15 11:16:40

Good advice here S2B let us ALL (including you) leave it at that perhaps?

baubles Fri 29-May-15 11:19:27

Could we have a 'head in hands' or 'banging head on desk' emoticon? Even a biscuit would do.

Ana Fri 29-May-15 11:20:17


soontobe Fri 29-May-15 11:20:31

Thank you LucyGransnet. That answers my question.

Agus Fri 29-May-15 11:35:57

(*hand-head-hand*). Best I could do Baubles

This is just a repeat of the many thoughtful pieces of advice soon has received before re her understanding of posting.

Ariadne Fri 29-May-15 11:44:02

But you do ask a great many questions yourself, *soontobe!!

mcem Fri 29-May-15 11:57:53

I believe that this notion of having to answer every question and comment stems from a need to have the last word.
It may be (given other snippets of information offered) that GN is the only place where this might be possible. Another example of trying to exert control.
Good advice given about ignoring posts or taking a break.
My last words on the subject ( I hope ) - attention-seeking!

jinglbellsfrocks Fri 29-May-15 12:07:09

FGS soon toughen up! You are a grown-up! And just how could Lucy's stock answer possibly have told you anything you couldn't work out for yourself? hmm

I think you joined this site hoping to be the resident mother-hen/consultant Christian. It can't possibly work that way. You just need to deal with it like the rest of us do. biscuit

janeainsworth Fri 29-May-15 12:08:05

Soontobe there are such things as rhetorical questions.
These are questions that are asked for effect, to support an argument point of view, and do not require an answer.
Many of the questions you feel yourself obliged to answer fall into this category.

Lilygran Fri 29-May-15 12:21:44

I like the biscuits, Ana, jingl

Ana Fri 29-May-15 12:26:57

We've had them for a while, Lilygran but they're not in the Smileys list.

Just type 'biscuit' between square brackets.

thatbags Fri 29-May-15 13:02:04

You can have cake too, lily birthday3