Come on HQ!!

I think GN is in more trouble than it realises.

I agree Jane10. Let's hope they are continuing to read this thread and taking our comments seriously. If advertisers were getting twitchy back in the day over controversial posts, then heaven only knows how they'll be reacting now.

Lisagran, ?

I too am appalled that someone can make really nasty sexist comments and someone’s says something innocuous like ‘weather a bit chilly’ and gets deleted
I ve reported threads that are obviously fake to be told by HQ they think they re fine and will keep an eye on them, but meanwhile they get nastier
The comments to MawBroon were horrible and should have been deleted and dealt with and the poster laughs it all off and carries on merrily
PLEASE don’t anyone leave you are my friends even if I don’t always agree

Jane I think you've hit the nail on the head and GN is in more trouble than they realise.
We see slaps on the wrists and deleted comments which are not justified, while wearisome and tacky posts are indulged.
It simply isn't good enough to chant the mantra "it breaches our guidelines".
If the guidelines need a thorough overhaul then GNHQ should get on with that - maybe even with some meaningful feedback from members and I don't mean faffing around with a pointless survey which is then disregarded!
The guidelines are not engraved on tablets of stone so let's change them so that they are acceptable to the membership!

That's exactly what they are, GUIDELINES!

Guidelines can be adapted. Many people rely on GN for company and an opportunity to socialise.
When regular, long time and respected posters are treated badly and GNHQ do nothing about it, there is a very strong possibilty that they will leave. That will be a great loss to the GN family.

Can I stick my neck out and say that Gransnet can be a difficult place to navigate as a newbie. You all 'know' each other, you know the rhythms and style of writing, for people trying to join in the conversation, it can be hard to get the tone right.
Some of us sit quietly and try to make an odd comment, some jump in with both feet, assuming the regular gransnetters will 'get' them.
I have a very dry sense of humour which I am keeping in check whilst I find my feet, but others, who are more confident, might want to just join in.
I have found it a bit difficult, because since I posted, there have been several threads saying how terrible GN is now with all new posters posting rubbish etc.,
I am one of thse new posters, and far from feeling welcomed now feel utterly disillusioned.

I will go back to lurking, i do enjoy the personalities on here, and love reading what you are up to. But thought a different perspective might be of interest first.

Take care all flowers

I ve only just read the husband home thread
That was appalling Admin what’s the matter with your abilities and please don’t say there’s not t enough of you as you come on very quickly when the word ‘onside’ is mentioned

I firmly believe there are a few new posters ( and it could be the same one) who have come on here purely to disrupt and set poster against poster and to make accusations of bullying to give everyone the wobbles Please don’t let it unsettle us and please don’t take it to heart

Hopefully the three I m thinking of will flounce off As promised

As others have said, in the main, it’s not a happy or pleasant place to pop into these days. It’s a pity as for many its been a bit of enjoyable and valued human interaction. I’m becoming less and less inclined to engage with it all, a pity since I’ve got “know” some interesting folk and seen how supportive many are to any who are struggling.

Surely advertisers only get twitchy if you say something derogoratory about their product.

I doubt they care if one GNr makes a derisory remark to another. Or how many feathers get ruffled along the way.

I agree. It has become particularly bad over the last week or so, no longer a pleasant place to interact with like minded people and surely we all understand that is a very broad area and covers many people in many situations & circumstances. As a website for the more mature, we, (most of us) make allowances for that and agree to differ, voice opinions forcefully sometimes but stay within the parameters of good manners & decency. Postings which start quite innocently seem to increasingly turn unpleasant with really nasty, rude, unkind comments. If as we all suspect the troll count has gone up then surely a more rigorous check by GNHQ should be brought in to deal with this.

EllaKeat, it is difficult to navigate GN, when you are a "newbie". However, we don't all know each other, as you seem to think.
I got to know some posters by joining in the lighter threads, like Good Morning and the games and going to the Edinburgh meet ups. I lurked for a long time, before I plucked up the courage to join in.
The thing is that recently, some newer members, instead of coming in gently and finding what the lie of the land is, have come in either with fake threads or with all guns blazing and becoming quite personal towards some posters, who have disagreed with them. The result: people get upset and things escalate.
Posters need to understand and accept that not everyone will share their opinion and just move on.
Yesterday was not a good day on GN, so different from when I first joined.
Please stick with it and find your way around, there are many lovely people on GN.

Ella it simply is not true that everyone knows everyone else. How could it be?
Many, many new posters are warmly welcomed but if a first post is rude and unpleasant or, as is currently happening, a disruptive 'windup', what do you expect.
It's not unreasonable to think that a potential poster might lurk for a few days to get the feel of the site, then make an introductory post on an non-controversial thread.
Choosing a provocative username and then jumping straight in to carp and criticise is hardly a recipe for success.
Imagine walking into a party, introducing yourself as Idon'tgiveadamn and proceeding to tell the guests that they're a bunch of boring old farts whose opinions are worth nothing! Hardly a promising start is it?

Hello! I'm not a regular poster and joined only a couple of years ago. I had hoped this could be a surrogate
social life as I do not have any female friends within 100 mile radius and I sorely miss the regular chat, laughs and social outings of my group of good friends. The idea of being part of the Gnet family really appealed. I felt I was getting to know you all -your ups and downs, your pains, your Joy's, it was a good feeling. I wouldn't recognise a troll if it wore a badge stating so. I'm afraid I always believe what people say to me as truth. Naively probably. But yes I'm afraid I've been logging in much less often, losing heart with some of the unpleasantness, fear of posting something that would be misinterpreted or mis understood or worse, causing offence. Some posts become in depth debates and very good for seeing alternative points of view. Some can be just a bit of pointless fun, even childish fun, it can lighten the load, there is a place for it. But I have to agree with some of this mornings concerns about unpleasant arenas. Its disheartening. I did think about not coming back atall recently but I'm still here so far.

That’s an excellent post mcem , really worth thinking about .

Don’t be put off EllaKeat , we aren’t a bunch of nasty bullies , honest ! Now and again , like in any family, there are ruffled feathers but it settles down . There are lots of threads where dipping your toe in is easy and usually not confrontational.

Once upon a time the political threads were incredibly cut and thrust and I quickly learnt not a place for the faint hearted so no place for me. Now I give those threads a miss .

You’ll quickly find where your comfort zone is and also those posters you enjoy interacting with. It won’t be long before you’re comfortable here , promise !

Bring back Geraldine.

I'm pining for the days of "black plimsolls from Shoezone".........

For anyone genuine PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don’t be put off and ellakat and Marthjolly1 no we don’t all know each other I don’t know anyone on here except one poster I clicked with but she only rarely posts and we just found we had a lot in common and we pm each other and I really value that

We must not let a handful (or I think more likely one or maybe two posters using different names) disrupt us, divide us and chase us off a wonderful site I d be lost without this, even when I don’t agree with comments or opinions

Please don’t let this divide us

It’s getting ridiculous on GN now, people who register just to have fun with the ‘old dears’ or to be disruptive and fantasists and attention seekers abound.
I’m not wasting time sending messages of good wishes to those, you can’t believe everything that you are told on here, ( and if you do it isn’t a virtue it’s being naive and gullible.)

It’s nothing to do with being new, so newbies needn’t be put off.

Spot on marydoll

Although I have commented on a few threads I am terrified of saying the wrong thing and if a good amount of you are fed up with GN then what is stopping you setting up your own forum and inviting only those you love and trust. I don’t know how to set up a forum but have belonged to several that are now defunct, I do agree GN is not a welcoming, share the love kind of place, there are a lot of strident, opinionated people who scare the shit out of any newcomers.

Advertisers will buy space only if they think there's a good sized audience for their ads. If GN membership reduces it reduces the whole site's value to its owners. Its worth while for GNHQ to give some more thought to making us who are currently regular a bit more likely to stay.

I dont post as much as I used to mainly because I dont have the time but when I do like today I am amazed at how many delayed posts there are - what is going on - what is it I cant say now. I dont mind if someone is rude to me really I just ignore them just as I would if I met them in real life. I do think its possible to debate things as a adult without resorting to personal comments though. I wouldnt want to leave here but its not the fun site it used to be.

Perhaps the opposite could happen - if there is a lot of aggro on the forum, membership could soar as thousands join to observe the fireworks.

That was to Jane