In Memoriam thread - would it work?

kircubbin2000

I don't think it would work. I have no idea who any of these people are and I think it would only be a clique who would post. It would alienate the rest of us.

Why would it "alienate" anybody? If you didn't know the person, you would just move on. There are loads of other posts to follow where everybody can participate.

I think it would be a good idea, too. No one has to go to a particular thread and those who didn't like it, or didn't wish to participate, could just not go there.

Kate1949

This brings to mind a poster from a few years ago with the user name willsandco. Does anyone remember her? She seemed like a fantastic lady. She had lost her husband and had found a lovely new man in her 60s and was asking advice about wedding outfits. Not long after the wedding, she was diagnosed with Motor Neurone Disease. I think of her sometimes when I am whinging about something ridiculous.

Yes, I 'knew' willsandco, a lovely lady. We used to communicate away from GN too. I remember that her MND diagnosis came before the wedding, but her lovely man wanted to go ahead and look after until the end. I often think of her and count my blessings.

Re the “clique” word on Gransnet.

I don’t want to cause an argument, I think I am a ‘middle ‘ sort of GN member. I am not a long established ‘been on it for years’ person, neither am I a newbie.

But if you are relatively new, I can see how certain posts come across as ‘cliquey’, because you obviously aren’t aware of back history, as was very evident by the Phoenix one.

And as in many walks of life, it can sometimes appear that a few members like you to know that they are part of the old guard.

Someone once remarked how certain members felt they were ‘Gransnet Royalty’.

This always makes me smile, particularly on the actual Royalty threads.

Do you mean that we cannot have a past in case it upsets someone?

Whenever and whatever you become a member of, it will have a history not known to you but shared by ithers.

it was suggested that the 'In Memoriam' thread could include posts from those whose loss has been personal,where the deceased is only known to the poster.

I think many people have anniversaries of those, where, they are overwhelmed by memories and emotion and wish to express them and will immediately have the sympathy of those who have experienced a similar loss.

Gransnet royalty ? Funny, a bit pathetic really. But then I am not a monarchist.

This ‘clique’ v. new posters thing really annoys me.

I joined two years ago.
I knew no one.
And to be honest, I didn’t get the easiest of rides to begin with!
Now I know everyone.

It’s done by joining in; being polite (I hope) and being interested in posters (most of them) and what they post (most of the time).

You wouldn’t walk into a pub or new work place etc, and then walk out complaining that others knew each other.

Likewise you wouldn’t sit down with a group of women who were chatting amongst themselves; then immediately act all affronted because you didn’t know what or who they were talking about/ didn’t agree with them/ thought that they we’re boring.

You get out what you put in.
If you resent others friendships and relationships on here, you’re not going to get anywhere.

Anyway back to the Memorial topic: my beloved Nan died last year. She was a wonderful woman with a long and interesting life.
I would have loved a specific place to talk about her.
In the event I posted about her in the Night Owls thread.

As I said previously, it’s a brilliant idea, for lots of reasons.
It would be a good space for when we lose famous people too, and want to share our memories of them.

Fanny ????

Thank you Meryl
<Adjusts tiara and curtesys>

Well said CalendarGirl

I joined about 6 or 7 years ago and do not consider myself to be anyone other than part of the crowd. Which suits me. A couple of years later my dd became seriously ill land I posted my distress on here and am still in direct contact with one gran who was so kind. I found it very sad that the post fir Phoenix was destabilised as it was.

As for a memorial thread for anyone to remember past GN members or anyone who has lost someone in their personal lives who want to talk about their person or those who don’t have anyone to share their feelings or memories with. they could use that knowing it will be received with kindness.

Fanny I do remember you posting about your gran, it’s hard to lose someone dear but how wonderful you had her for so long in your life.

It’s a very good idea it’s somewhere you know you would get support from other posters. Those who wish to share their memories of a former member of gransnet or a loved one.

Redhead you put that succinctly, where I spend ages rambling along with ‘more is better’ when words are concerned.. and am doing it again!

I’m sure there are many who have nobody close with whom to share memories of a loved one who would find such a facility very helpful.

A lovely idea ixion. I knew the aforementioned deceased GN posters but whether I knew any of the deceased names to follow is of no matter as I share their sorrow.

To spoil such a sensitive thread complaining certain people where not known to us is in very bad taste.

Very sad shysal

She was very brave Greenfinch

I think it’s a lovely idea ixion.

Calendargirl there are some names I recognise from when I started on GN which is quite a few years now and yours is one I’m always glad to see.

I like this idea too. If not a new forum, then it could take on a "continuing place" thread in the same way the soop kitchen, the argy bars and one or two other threads have. That would allow for repeat mentions of deceased GNers, which I'm sure will happen.

Lovely idea.

I think it us a wonderful idea. We have all lost loved ones , many people don't have the opportunity to talk about those people they no longer have in their lives so an In Memoriam Thread would fill that gap. Some times even family are reluctant ( for their personal reasons) to discuss
a person that has died. Also people do not want to off load onto friends!
I feel sure a thread like this would be beneficial. As for GN being a clique - that is not the case. We each use GN in a way that is right for us , we dip in and out as we need to - some people much more involved than others.

Baggs continuing threads are really hard to maintain, especially if you aren’t already ‘on’ them.
It’s also difficult as many threads don’t appear in the Active List and keep disappearing (don’t get me started on this!)

Lucca

kircubbin2000

I don't think it would work. I have no idea who any of these people are and I think it would only be a clique who would post. It would alienate the rest of us.

I think it would be perfectly acceptable

. But I’d like to put in a plea at this point for no more use of the “clique” word. People who have similar views or “know” someone in common are not a “clique”.

I agree, Lucca
Posters who have common experiences or had close connections with other posters are not a clique.
The word is being freely bandied around as an insult and, on a thread remembering a well-liked poster, it is very upsetting.

I think it's a good idea, ixion, although perhaps posters could keep fond reminiscences about cats, dogs etc, under the Pets section?