I need a complete overhaul

I always think with the problems you see yourself as having, it is best to seek professional help. Most big department stores have Personal Stylists who you can book for a day or half day to restructure your wardrobe and suggest garments that would suit you.

Similarly, with deciding on a suitable exercise or beauty programme. An advice session with a trainer at a gym or sports centre and qualified beautician can give far better advice than we can.

I would be very concerned about any eating regime that enables you to lose a stone in a fortnight -and probably put it back on as fast. There is so much information in the media at present on different weight loss program from 5:2, 16:8, Slimming World, Weight Watchers, to name but a few, that it should be possible for you to identify one best suited to your medical condition that will enable you to lose weight in a slower manner and more sustainably.

I love a challenge!
But Maggie Smith cannot have been much over 30 when she starred as Miss Jean Brodie and I think she looked amazing!
Cut that fringe, hit the shops and if you are a size 10/12 what are you complaining about!
Go girl!

Good classic clothes are what’s needed, invest in some great trousers/jeans. NYDJ are excellent and keep their shape, the stretch means they will cope with weight fluctuations and they hold the tummy in.
Team with quality cashmere sweaters and buy a few nice shirts with some stretch.
Good leather loafers and some classic Chelsea boots.
All the above are my “ go to “ items.
I buy cashmere in the sales and wear V neck sweaters with nice scarves or put a shirt underneath.
In summer I wear a brand of trouser called Deck by decollage, these come as a Capri or full length and are easy care and very stylish.
I am 5”2 and a size 12 with fluctuating weight?. Finally unless you’ve already done so yet properly measured for a bra and buy a few good bras.
Good luck ??

Go a blonde bob with nice earrings!

Sorry u said they dont suit you -so go shoulder length and flip hair outwards.

If your hair is thin and lank a short cut would be better. You say you don’t suit short hair, but there is a short cut for everyone- you just need to find a really good hairdresser and invest in a good cut.
I don’t think there is any such thing as too youthful dress! If you like it, and it suits you, wear it, from rock star t- shirts, jeans and DMs to maxi dresses and ankle boots. The important thing is to get the fit right- slim jeans, but a looser top to cope with fuller waist days.
Finally, a good lipstick makes a big difference: go to a top brand counter and ask for the assistant’s advice. Similarly, get a good blusher to accentuate the cheekbones- no need for fillers. What fun to have a makeover!

How I wished you lived near me so we could go shopping together! I am 66 but told I look much younger. I keep my hair a honey blonde, have a fringe and shoulder length layered style which I like to wear “messy” or a bit tousled as I think it looks more casual/younger (??) and suits my lifestyle. My style icons are probably Goldie Hawn and Helen Mirren as I like their looks and attitude. After that famous photo of Helen in her bikini, it gave me the confidence to continue wearing mine! I love my jeans, biker jacket, denim jackets of all colours in the summer and still crave maxi skirts and dresses. I definitely don’t dress like a granny, but I also don’t want to look like “mutton dressed as lamb”, so try to find a happy medium. Experiment with bright colours and clothes you would never think of wearing! Try them on in the comfort and privacy of your own home - you may be pleasantly surprised! I prefer boot-cut or straight leg jeans rather than “skinny” ones - and as for leggings........ well, they remind me of Max Wall (showing my age now) but I know they are very popular at the moment and can look ok on the right person and body shape! I often think of the saying “if we could see ourselves as others see us”. I bet you are lovely but just lacking in confidence. As I said before, how I wish we could go on a shopping trip together - one of my friends is always saying I would make a good “personal advisor “ when it comes to buying clothes! Good Luck - and enjoy experimenting! x

To make a start ....

How about finding a GOOD hairdressers... you’ll probably be shocked how much you have to pay ... but bite the bullet ... it’s worth it and go to the best cutter ... usually the person most booked up ..

Exercise... I’d contact the local leisure centre and get onto a Pilates course ... and stick with it ....strength and flexibility...

Then slowly take your self in hand....

Try on lots of different styles of clothing to see what suits you for each occasion. Try on wigs to see what hairstyle suits then get your hair cut and styled. Go swimming rather than run, eat sensibly, don't go down the cosmetic surgery route and smile more, and stop thinking someone else should come up with solutions for you. Sort yourself out, be positive, help others who are worse off than yourself and you will feel much better for it!

As you've already done the House of Colours colour analysis, why not treat yourself and go to one of their Style Days? I found them very useful - they look at all sorts of things like face shape, body shape, bone structure, different styles of clothes, flattering lengths, etc. They also do a makeup half day. About 20 years ago, I didn't have a clue how to improve my appearance, and did the Colours, Style and Make-up days and they really helped me. Also, they seemed expensive at the time but they've saved me loads of money in "mistakes" over the years - I know exactly what suits me and what doesn't. Takes all the guesswork out of it. (20 years ago! Sounds like I'm due for a refresher !)

For your hair I would buy a hair piece. Veronica Gray is very good or there are lot on Amazon. Then look at a site called African Butterfly. Put your hair in a pony tail, cover with the hair piece then hold in place with the butterfly grip. There are lots of tips on how to use them and they have a huge range. Although they are much dearer than the ones on Amazon, they are much stronger. The Elastic seems to sag on cheaper ones.

John Lewis have a style me page. I have found some lovely things on there, which I would never have found just using their website. You fill out a questionnaire about styles and colours and they give quite a big range of suggestions.

Thin hair usually looks better if it's very layered - can be short, shoulder length or longer, but the layers give the illusion of thickness.

Blunt cut works well with fine hair. It avoids whispiness.

A good haircut by a good stylist is priceless, it looks good with minimal upkeep and takes years off you. When you next see a woman with a hairstyle you like ask her where she has it cut, she will be delighted to tell you. With haircuts it really is true that you get what you pay for and, of course, the result is on show every day. I spray mine with water every morning, do a quick blow dry, it always looks salon fresh and goes right through to evening ‘do’s’ with just a finger through instead of a comb.

There is a great online service called Try Tuesday from M&S- like a web based personal shopper- suggests outfits both outside and inside your comfort zone, taking inspiration from current and classic trend. After never buying anything from there for years (apart from food and undies) I love their suggestions - give it a go? As a thin hair sufferer myself - highlights can make the hair look a little bit thicker rather than a solid colour I find.

Why don't you love yourself - faults and all.
When we are older things change and we no longer have the youthful bloom but we have wisdom and maturity to help.
We are not just how we look which is what society dictates but so much more.
Homeopathy can help with your health challenges.

Actually I think you sound beautiful with many positives
I have very fine Med blonde hair lucky not to have any greys I uses a touch of silver shampoo to keep it bright and if I do dye I use Avon dyes as they cover well look natural and are gentle. They do a lovely dark blonde or med ach blonde that will just cover the grey and freshen your natural colour and give you lovely shine and they are always on offer.
Have you considered updos putting your hair up can give the illusion of thickness again there are loads of Bloggs on You tube I use pretty hairy clips to hold the short wishy bits into place but soft and wispy is better than tight and prim. There are loads of products such as spays gels and moose that will give the illusion of body again Avon have an excellent range. You can also buy pieces but I have never found one in a mid-blonde that works .
I cut my own fringe in there are lots of blogs on you tube that show you how including celebrity hair dressers. The trick is to cut in, not along to keep it soft and wispy . MY friend got her daughter to cut the first fringe in but now maintains it herself. It is really easy as long as you keep it soft and wispy. I roll my hair with spongy rollers sometimes to give it body
. I do not fillers have I use make up contour and highlighter to give me definition, again this takes time to get right but there are loads of blogs or go to a beauty counter. I look at young girls see how they do there make up then just do it myself I take it down a bit as some young girls wear loads the trick is keep it soft and eyes Smokey .Eye brows will give you definition I use Primark eyebrowed definer in Dark blonde I use setting spray to keep them in place .
the trick is to use brushes and blend I also wear false eyelashes in natural to give my eyes definition. Lis stick will help give colour and definition and take the eye away from the my jowls to your face. I am blonde and fair so I tend to wear pinks, plums and coppers but do wear red now and then

As for clothes I shop around and look in younger shops or shops that sell trendy but appropriate clothes as well as high tend such a Dorthey Perkins, New look Zara, H&M. George and Matalan all sell trendy but classic bits, Wallis and Joules are ok to but can be a bit prim it’s a fine line I think the key is keeping things simple and striking I wear black but also lots of bright colours too. I shop in charity shops as well to find labels I couldn’t otherwise afford.

. I wear high-waisted skinny jeans, and trendy tops for clausal with trendy trainer like pumps mostly from New Look I stick to classic jackets and very simple dresses or skirts for work and slim fitting work trousers with crisp shirts.
I don’t go to the gym but I maintain my size 8-10 figure by walking to the train station to work every day and back about 7 miles a day I also fast two days a week which makes me feel more healthy than I ever did before but I know that not possible for everyone so I am not suggesting you do that but for me it works on the 2 days I fast I am running around I just don’t notice I havent eaten I eat a small health meal when I get in and drinks loads all day. Perhaps your doctor good advice you on Weight flu fluctuation. I do have an hour class figure and Find simple body comp dresses to the knee look lovely I pop smart jackets over to hide any tummy issues.
If you live anywhere near south East England, I would come out shopping with you and help you find a style that suits you. Do you have a daughter or a friend that could do that ?
You sound to me like you have lost your confidence This happened to me when my husband died. I found by just looking around me at other smart women my age, checking out blogs and mags I soon found my style again.

Actually I think you sound beautiful with many positives but you have claerly lost your confidence and feel lost in the style zone.
I have very fine Med blonde hair, lucky not to have any greys I uses a touch of silver shampoo to keep it bright and if I do dye I use Avon dyes as they cover well look natural and are gentle. They do a lovely dark blonde or med ash blonde that will just cover the grey and freshen your natural colour and give you lovely shine and they are always on offer.
Have you considered updos putting your hair up can give the illusion of thickness again there are loads of Bloggs on You tube to help. I use pretty hairy clips to hold the short wishy bits into place but soft and wispy is better than tight and prim. There are loads of products such as sprays gels and mousse that will give the illusion of body, again Avon have an excellent range. You can also buy hair pieces but I have never found one in a mid-blonde that works .
I cut my own fringe in, again there are lots of blogs on you tube that show you how including celebrity hair dressers. The trick is to cut in, not along to keep it soft and wispy . My friend loved mine so much she got her daughter to cut the first fringe in but now maintains it herself. It is really easy as long as you keep it soft and wispy. I roll my hair with spongy rollers sometimes to give it body
I do not fillers and never would, I use make up I use contour and highlighter to give me definition, again this takes time to get right but there are loads of blogs or go to a beauty counter. I look at young girls see how they do there make up then just do it myself I take it down a bit as some young girls wear loads, the trick is keep it soft blended and eyes Smokey. Eye brows will give you definition I use Primark eyebrowed definer in Dark blonde I use setting spray to keep them in place.
The trick is to use brushes and blend I also wear false eyelashes in natural to give my eyes definition. Lip stick will help give colour and definition to your face and take the eye away from the "jowls" . I am blonde and fair so I tend to wear pinks, plums and coppers but do wear red now and then
As for clothes I shop around and look in younger shops or shops that sell trendy but appropriate clothes as well as high tend such a Dorthey Perkins, New look Zara, H&M. George and Matalan all sell trendy but classic bits, Wallis and Joules are ok too but can be a bit prim, it’s a fine line I think the key is keeping things simple and striking I wear black but also lots of bright colours too I sometimes just use colour to pop, so yesterday I had a simple black dress on with a bright pink jacket then everything else black apart from bright pink earrings. A bright jacket can take the eye away from the tummy. I today I have completely black on with a floral shoe. I shop in charity shops as well to find labels I couldn’t otherwise afford.
I wear high-waisted skinny jeans, and trendy tops for clausal with trendy trainer like pumps mostly from New Look. I stick to classic jackets and very simple dresses or pencil ( stretchy ) skirts for work and slim fitting work trousers with crisp shirts.
I don’t go to the gym but I maintain my size 8-10 figure by walking to the train station to work every day and back about 7 miles a day. I also fast two days a week which makes me feel healthier than I ever did before. However I know that not possible for every but I works for me I on days I fast am running around and busy, I just don’t notice I havent eaten I eat a small health meal when I get in and drinks loads all day. Perhaps your doctor could advice you on Weight fluctuation. I too have an hour class figure and Find simple body comp dresses to the knee look lovely I pop smart jackets over to hide any tummy issues. High waisted jeans are wonderful too.
If you live anywhere near south East England, I would come out shopping with you and help you find a style that suits you. Do you have a daughter or a friend that could do that?

Perhaps a search on Youtube would give you some ideas and either on Youtube or Facebook if you're on that search for Sharon Danley. She has lots of advice for ladies of a certain age.

Gilly1952 I loved your answeryou are older than me but have the same style and attidue as me. Good for you

Thank you pinkjj27, that’s lovely of you to say so! x

Being a size 10 or 12 isn't an advantage at our age because all clothes made to fit these sizes are suitable for 16-30 year olds. You can't find anything in charity shops either except for jeans because only large women are charitably inclined or bent on saving the environment.

Check the internet for clothes - you may not want to buy them there, but you can find out what you like and would consider buying.

There are various gentle forms of exercise, check local evening classes or ask your GP for a referral to a physiotherapist who could advise you.

A little exercise every day is far better than doing a lot one day and not being able to move the next.

Oh and try to find a hairdresser who will do what you want with your hair.

grandtanteJE65 qoute "because only large women are charitably inclined or bent on saving the environment"
This is not my expeience I use charity shops that are near univeristys and town centers and find lots of younger styles, lots of designer lables and lots of smaller sizes. Also I am a size 8-10 and belong to lots of enviormental groups some that invlove lobbing and I always give to chairty shops and I upcyle . I teach young students in college and find most of then very hell bend on saving the enviotment
they run clothes swapping parties, donate to chairty, wear vinatge used stuff and upcyle their clothes many of these girls and 10 to 12 size or smaller.

Please gransnet get an edit button smile

I rest my case (smile)