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Style & beauty

Do you want to look "smart"

(123 Posts)
eddiecat78 Mon 03-Jul-23 12:37:48

Reading the thread about how much we spend on clothes made me think that we all have a certain way we like to look.
Well - when asked his opinion about anything I am wearing my OH is inclined to say "You look very smart". Frankly I don't want to look smart unless I have a business appointment or going to a funeral. I would like to look stylish - or, in my dreams, gorgeous.
Incidentally when he saw our daughter try on her wedding dress he responded - "yes you look very smart"! No woman wants to look smart on their wedding day!
How do you aim to look? And what reactions do you get from nearest and dearest?

Scribbles Tue 04-Jul-23 17:22:34

I've rarely asked a man how I look because I dress the way I want to. However, if SO sees me tweaking in front of a mirror or dithering over choice of shoes, he generally says something like, "Come on; time to go. You'll do."

MerylStreep Tue 04-Jul-23 17:29:38

Mandy74

My short answer to the original question is “No” (I don’t want to look smart). I wouldn’t want to look scruffy if I’m out in public, but equally I wouldn’t feel relaxed and comfortable wearing, say, ‘slacks’, a crisp white blouse, a navy blazer with gold buttons, navy kitten heels, a blue handbag with a gold chain handle - which is how I think of ‘smart’.

What’s uncomfortable about the clothes you describe: they’re clothes. They’re hardly a Victorian corset.
The only item I agree on is the gold chain on the handbag 😟

rockgran Tue 04-Jul-23 17:33:44

I aim for clean and tidy - anything else is a bonus.

Helenlouise3 Tue 04-Jul-23 19:31:56

Unless I walked past him naked I don't think hubby would comment on anything I wore. I'm always clean and tidy around the house and always change if I'm going out. I like to wear perfume on a daily basis, but the funny thing is, on days that I happen not to wear it he tells me I smell nice lol

Bijou Tue 04-Jul-23 21:24:34

I have been housebound for six years and rarely see anyone apart my daily help or District Nurse but always wear a nice dress in summer and skirt and top in winter. I tried one day to stay in nightdress and dressing gown but by lunch time felt scruffy so got dressed.

Georgesgran Tue 04-Jul-23 22:49:30

I’ll settle for presentable!
When I’d ask my late DH if I looked ok to go out, he would reply ‘don’t worry, it’ll be dark in there!’
I’m a trousers and top person, usually in one colour, brightened by the odd pop of colour. Years ago, we had the builders in and one day, I was going out, wearing a black and white dress and heels. I can still see the tiler doing a double take - ‘bloody hell, you scrub up well’ we’re his exact words

Deedaa Tue 04-Jul-23 23:18:49

Before so much was done on line I used to make an effort to dress for the situation. If I was trying to get round the bank manager I would dress like the sort of woman he might see socialising with his wife - one manager was surprisingly easy to take in! For a while I dressed up to deal with the consultant treating my husband, basing my look on the female consultants he worked with. Then I realised that he liked me anyway so I went back to being me.

Now I don't really have anyone to impress and I can wear what I like. Not sure what the neighbours think but I like to think I add a bit of colour to their lives wink

annodomini Tue 04-Jul-23 23:28:45

What do you say to your DH when he is dressed appropriately for a social occasion? Mostly we tell menfolk that they look 'smart', so perhaps that accounts for the gaps in their vocabulary when it comes to complimenting their womenfolk. However, when I was sent a picture of DGS (almost 18) dressed for his school prom, I couldn't quite say 'smart', so resorted to 'smooth' or 'cool' I don't know if these would be appropriate for an older man.

Gundy Tue 04-Jul-23 23:53:39

Dressing smart? I just want to BE smart. Still working on it.

When I dress I aim for a “completed” look, a little trendy, smooth and clean. Nothing worse than having one piece jarring out of place - something ripped or dirty, a mismatched jacket or forgetting a scarf, horribly worn down shoes.

I don’t wear a lot of jewelry either - earrings and a good watch, certain rings do it for me.
I’m totally into shoes, though.

When I receive compliments - especially from other women, it makes my day. Altho I don’t seek their approval - only mine.
One of my husbands was always very complimentary (even when I felt down), the other not so much.
USA Gundy

Coolgran65 Wed 05-Jul-23 04:48:03

We were at a wedding last week. Before leaving I told dh that he looked very handsome and smart. And waited...... dh got the message and told me I looked 'fine'. I replied that a roast chicken is fine. He managed...You look good. (For some reason he chokes on effusive compliments.... Tho he did once tell me that I suited a colour I was wearing).

Later at the wedding we sat chatting with ds, dil and dgd. Dgd is a gorgeous 16 year old. I was happily relating how dh 'complimented me....I thought it was funny.
Dgd leaned across me and said to dh..... Granda I hope you told granny how nice she looks today. Dh replied, of course I did. She asked him, what did you say? Dh replied that he had told me I looked good. She told granda.... Well I think you could do better than that!! With a smile dh said .... I think granny is looking very nice. To which dgd said... Oh grandad you're hopeless but just as well we all know you love her to bits.

MrsKen33 Wed 05-Jul-23 05:04:00

Smart…. Me? Not often. I have my own way of dressing. I dislike most patterns so most of my clothes are plain. I wear specific colours, mostly blues and greens with white T-shirts etc. I never wear red or orange. A little bohemian my DD says but clean.And I always wear pretty underwear, clumpy shoes and big jumpers in the winter. That’s my style and I’m happy with it

Skyblue2 Wed 05-Jul-23 11:36:30

My new DH loves clothes and loves to buy me things. He actually has very good taste. If I don’t look good in something he would be quick to say so.!

Wyllow3 Wed 05-Jul-23 11:42:31

Colourful casual, always. I have no longer anything I'd call smart. Maybe dressed up casual.

Theexwife Wed 05-Jul-23 11:51:23

I prefer a casual look, smart to me looks out of place in a day-to-day setting, people in supermarkets well groomed with makeup and smart clothes make me think it is the only outing they have.

I do think that if you feel more comfortable being smart then it is right for you, what I or anyone else thinks is irrelevant as you wont know what others think.

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 05-Jul-23 12:02:59

I would be well groomed and wearing makeup and smart, but not in the sense of wearing a suit and heels! Jeans and shirt type of thing. Not sloppy.

Norah Wed 05-Jul-23 12:09:49

Germanshepherdsmum

I would be well groomed and wearing makeup and smart, but not in the sense of wearing a suit and heels! Jeans and shirt type of thing. Not sloppy.

I feel the same, with nice sandals.

Hetty58 Wed 05-Jul-23 12:27:24

Only on Gransnet do I hear (so often) the words 'smart' and 'stylish'. How do I aim to look? What a weird question?

I like to feel comfortable instead, that's my main concern. I do scrub up very nicely for special occasions - but I've never been one to dress up for daily life.

I wear dresses in the summer because I like them. Who would be looking at me anyway - and do I care what they think? No! Who really looks at old women - except maybe other old women?

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 05-Jul-23 12:48:01

I might be 72 but I certainly don’t look like an old woman !

Hetty58 Wed 05-Jul-23 12:53:23

Germanshepherdsmum, in our imagination, we are, of course, forever young!

Casdon Wed 05-Jul-23 13:08:25

Hetty58

Germanshepherdsmum, in our imagination, we are, of course, forever young!

In our sixties and seventies though the difference in appearance between somebody who has always taken a pride in their appearance and somebody who doesn’t is perhaps at its most stark. It’s important to be happy in your skin, but being comfortable doesn’t preclude taking pride in looking your best surely?

nanna8 Wed 05-Jul-23 13:12:48

I’m president of a couple of organisations so when we meet I like to look smart because I have to do a lot of public speaking. Otherwise, just relaxed. One thing about the lock downs here, I spent almost 2 years in trackie daks and t shirts, bliss. Nice trackie daks, though!

Staceyann Wed 05-Jul-23 14:12:03

These clothes threads - what do you wear / how much do you spend, etc - are odd, in that people seem to need to frequently defend their choice of clothing / level of sartorial elegance, whereas, in reality, there is no right or wrong - just what’s best for you / your lifestyle / your finances / your level of interest in clothes, etc.