Looking and feeling “matronly”

Are you still there, trish29?

I've a considerably over sized bosom and a small body. I purchase well fitting bras (minimisers typically). I wear shirts that fit very well, fall straight, in a size that doesn't nip in over my bosom.

I like T shirts, slight v necks, no cleavage showing, or 3 button polo type shirts. I tend toward white or black - both somewhat obscuring all that mass of flesh.

Bright pretty lippy. Interesting hair.

Yes still here and very appreciative of all the fantastically helpful responses. Busy day so not really able to take it all in yet! When I get home I’m going to enjoy going through them all.

A couple of things that I hope might be helpful. If you go by feel first of all. So which is your most comfortable, well fitting bra? If the answer is none, go and check out some bras and find what suits you. Also dont just stick to white or black. I have green, a rich brown, red , black and white. The coloured ones have taken more finding , but it is cheering to have a choice. Treat yourself to some lovely silk underwear. I think it feels so lovely and the joy is that you can feel really lmarvellous and no one (unless you want them to!) knows what you are wearing underneath. It can be quite fun to be sat at some serious meeting about something and just occasionally think , you have no idea of the inner or underneath me!! Think which of your clothes you have had in the not too distant past that you have loved, either for the look of it, or the feel of it. I was taught many years ago that you choose carefully what you want to wear, put it on and then forget about it and carry on with your day. Never mind what anyone else thinks about it, they are not wearing it you are!! Look around amongst your friends and acquaintances and see if there is someone whose style you like and admire, but dont copy them. They may have some ideas of where you might find similar sorts of clothes. I am a woman of champagne taste and beer money. My clothes have ranged from super sales things - best of those a blue silk shirtwaister, which never dates, goes with black velvet trousers for evenings , and is used for daytime too, to a great v neck cashmere sweater from a charity shop. These both make me feel comfortable and warm or cool as the case may be, and are a pleasure to wear. I do think how you feel in your clothes matters most. If you feel comfortable in them you will move better and in a less self conscious way. We all have good and bad days, and on a really tough day, putting something I really like on and a dash of eau de cologne gets me through the day. Hope you find something that makes you feel special . Who know we may pass in the street, gliding along in our silk. !

Thankyou all for your wonderful advice.
A few of you have mentioned lipstick. I spent a week in Valencia last year and noticed that a lot of women of my age looked great with their vibrant lip colours. I resolved to do the same but have lacked the confidence to go all out. I’ll try to ease myself in gently but I don’t even know how to apply it properly!
Also underwear - I agree and will get myself back to the specialist fitter I saw (once!) before lockdown.
I have had a quick look at HelenMaryJo ? and will look at Pinterest too. Great idea!
I think a lot will depend on my level of confidence and being willing to step outside my comfort zone. Thanks for your encouragement everyone!

Mar Ann LeCoeur on You Tube gives great styling advice.

I love this idea of going by “feel”. Thanks.

madeleine45 A couple of things that I hope might be helpful. If you go by feel first of all. So which is your most comfortable, well fitting bra? If the answer is none, go and check out some bras and find what suits you. Also dont just stick to white or black. I have green, a rich brown, red , black and white. The coloured ones have taken more finding , but it is cheering to have a choice. Treat yourself to some lovely silk underwear.

Excellent advice for big bosom women. I've bone beige coloured bras, because I typically wear white. However, I have a few really pretty coloured bras for under black or navy shirts. Makes me smile.

I love pretty underware, all colours, and don't care if it doesn't match my bone/beige minimiser bras - still makes me smile.

I'm very careful that my shirts aren't snug across my bosom, as I feel my bosom is better hidden in well fitting shirts, with cleavage well covered. However, I don't think waists need to be obscured, I tuck my shirts in my jeans. I think many people insist on covering a small waist, a mistake in my opinion. Waist and bosom are not nearly the same in the long line of a body.

Some people seem to believe that stripes round a top make them appear chubby, I don't believe that is true at all. My favourite non-solid colour tops are high boat neck, Breton style - black with white stripes, white with red stripes, and white with navy stripes - nipped in at the waist. With a good minimiser bra I look like I have a passable figure in stripes as well as solids.

She does indeed! I’ve had a look at a couple of her videos - very inspiring.

I have a similar problem, I am a apple shape with big boobs ( potato on cocktail sticks) . Wrap dresses , wrap tops , wide leg trousers, do help.
I have also started dressmaking, and have learnt to do full bust adjustments, which has helped a lot.

Casdon

Follow people who know how to dress well on YouTube, and experiment with different shapes and styles of clothes. One I really like is Helen Mary Jo, she’s in her sixties and a size 18, she just has the gift of putting things together and looking up to date (and she’s really funny too).

Casdon - thank you so much for recommending Helen Mary Jo on YouTube. I had never heard of her.

I spent most of yesterday watching loads of her videos on YouTube.

She could be my sister. Same age, same size, same hairstyle (but mine is dyed brown).

Her fashion recommendations are excellent for someone like me. Her 'Haul in my Hall' videos are honest and very useful. She reviews clothes from M&S, Matalan etc. They are all affordable brands.

There is also a make up tutorial. Her make up style is less is more. She also has videos about cruise wear, home ideas and cookery. I have only watched the fashion ones so far but I would highly recommend a look.

pascal30

Try Gudrun Sjoden clothes.. unusual. great colours and really suit older, larger women..

I have several Gudrun dresses, leggings and tunics. When I get bored with them they always sell for good money on line.

I spent a lot of time people watching on hols last week.

I saw some really voluptuous German women who looked stunning. Very cool haircuts, trendy specs, expensive looking trousers and tops and beautiful trainers.

I saw a mother and daughter, maybe 30 and 60ish going out one evening in all black clothes but they looked great as they both had nice tans and good posture.

It seems that most locals in Ibiza are quite small and very, very slender. Not a scrap of fat on them. They love the hippy look and it suits them. Yoga style trousers or harem pants, tie dye vests, fringed sandals and scarves on their heads. I took a photo of one elderly lady and she was easily 80+ and she had all the gear on but it suited her. Her hair was dyed bright red and she was as brown as a nut. Here she is in the yellow see through top.

I have friends in choirs and am always surprised by the styling of their ‘uniforms’. Scoop-necke, short -sleeved, calf length dresses are so unflattering. A slash necked dress to just below the knees with 3/4 sleeves is much more flattering. Not just to the older woman but actually for just about any woman. And works especially well when you’re dressing a varied group..

I don't agree about just below the knee dresses. They don't suit me at all. I prefer a midaxi length and I prefer short sleeves in warm weather (if we ever get any) We are all different shapes and sizes and different styles suit different people.

Primrose53
Think you may have accidentally posted a different photo to the one intended.

(If not, apologies)

Oh, I'm wrong, it could be yellow!
Sorry

Consider opting for well-fitted clothing that enhances your silhouette without being too tight.
V-neck tops can be flattering for a larger bust, drawing attention upwards. A-line or empire waist dresses and tops can also provide a flattering shape.
Darker colors on top can minimize the appearance of a larger bust, while lighter or patterned bottoms can balance your overall look.