Sex after 60 (NAME CHANGING ALLOWED)

Group sex kitty (your post 7:28)

wobbly, you are awful, but I like you .

Specki hope all goes well for you both.

Crafting - well, we are children of the 60s!

Why is it that some people keep pushing others to carry on with sex after 60? Surely that is a personal choice? Some people cannot enjoy sex because of health problems, others are glad to see the back of it and I don't just mean women, men as well. They just do not want it anymore. I know a couple who have had a very loving relationship without sex. Anyone would think that people cannot be happy without it. Look around you, not everyone is sex mad.

I am fed up with all these people who lay down the law about what we should or should not be doing. It is the same for the young wives with breast feeding. They are pushed in to believing that breast feeding is the only way and some cannot do it and are made to feel guilty because they cannot feed their babies.

If you enjoy sex fair enough, if you do not it is no concern of anyone else'. I think we all should mind our own business!

Sorry for the rant. This woman Marie de Hennezel and others like her really annoy me. Stop insisting that you know best. People will make up their own minds. We certainly are living in a Nanny State these days.

To be fair yorkshiregel Marie doesn't seem to be insisting that she knows best, she seems (to me) to be trying to help people to enjoy sex at any age, which also may help with their health and wellbeing.

Yorkshiregirl I see this thread has hit a raw nerve and I am sorry about that but if discussing sex makes you feel uncomfortable just change the page.
"If you enjoy sex" seems to me a very odd thing to say. Loving consensual sex is the most wonderful experience ever and It is sad that some people never (or no longer) experience it.

I think it is great that some of us can talk openly about sex in later years and still enjoy it, even if less gymnastic. Other simply get their enjoyment from a loving relationship where sex no longer plays a major part. Either way it is great that the older generation can feel young at heart. Our son has bought a new car today !, wonder if we will be asked to babysit again soon.

Behave Wobbly!

My question is what do you do if one wants sex and the other has lost interest. We have been married only nine years and up to the last 18 months enjoyed a good sex life. However, that has all disappeared with my husband saying he has little or no interest in making love any more. I'm heart broken as I love sex and always have done. He is on medication which of course may have something to do with it but what hurts the most is he has no intention of doing anything about it even though he knows how unhappy I am about the situation. I always keep myself nice and slim , hair, makeup etc, but am beginning to feel very unattractive. I love him to bits and he says he loves me but doesn't have any desire to go back to how we were. I try not to dwell on it and get on with my life. But it's a major factor missing in my life. Thanks to Gransnet for letting me offload.

Perhaps hotmama the medication has more of an effect on your DH than you think. Also perhaps the reason for the medication could impact him. He might be concerned for his health or just lost interest (I don't mean in you). Try looking up his medication or condition on the Internet and see what the side effects are. Hope you can persuade him to discuss it more as it is obviously upsetting you. I do also agree with others that it is possible to have a very loving relationship with or without sex. Depends on the individuals involved.

wobbly remember your bits. Take care in the car and don't get a puncture

I really DON'T have a problem with talking about sex. What I DO have a problem with is people who think they know best and who make others feel guilty because they do not agree with what they are pushing.

I do not believe that anyone should discuss their sex life with other strangers because I think it is a beautiful, wonderful but PRIVATE human intamacy. I think it is a betrayal of the OH when you talk about their needs or their lack of interest.

Yorkshire my reason for posting on here was because I had a specific physical issue that had put paid to my sex life. It took me a long while to get it sorted despite many trips to the GP, I saw one young Dr who was more embarrassed than me. When I finally got to see someone who could be bothered to actually examine me it was an easy fix. I hope my post might help someone else because I couldn't find any info at all, I thought I knew what the issue was but all the Drs were diagnosing vaginal atrophy and prescribing HRT, which wasn't the problem and made no difference at all. I haven't discussed with any of my friends or family except of course DH and nor would I but this looks like an ideal place to share the knowledge because it has improved our lives immensely. Sometimes people need help and information that they can't ask for face to face, an anonymous forum like this is brilliant.

LOL Crafting, I won't be getting up to any gymnastics in any car.

Yorkshiregel, Thank you for your post, I agree with you ,so much emphasis is put on the physical side of relationships these days, to the point of it making it seem to be more important than love , compassion &a caring, great for us all if it's still happening but get a grip girls, (no not there!) there are actually other activities out there (dare I say more than / just as enjoyable !) we could start a list ?

I'm missing out here, new car in April, getting another one soon and no one to share it with.

And it's going to be an Alhamba too, big enough to get a mattress in!

Ruby it looks like you've set yourself a challenge, five months to go, you'd better get your glad rags on and get out there.

Mattress !!! That's defeating the object surely ?

Shouldn't it be - " Are you enjoying this as much as I am ? well I would be , but that's the gear knob"

Crossing out not intended. Must get the hang of this.

GertrudeGrace Your post is exactly what I mean. Some people, for one reason or another, just cannot 'do' sex. What I was trying to say is we do not need people like this lady giving us a lecture. Where there is a way to express their love to each other people will find it. It does not have to be sex, sex, morning, night and day, wherever and whenever. Flowers, kisses, cuddles and words play a part too. What happened to romance?

I am sick of sitting watching something on tv with my family and then suddenly there is an explicit sex scene with women being thrown on to beds or slammed up against a wall. Love is not like that. That is lust. If I wanted to watch that I would switch to a pornography channel.

How does she think soldiers who are disabled because of war feel? Useless because they cannot perform? Apart from that it is harder and harder for shy people to undress as they get older and feel less attractive.

I am not talking about myself here....I am happy with my life....but I do not discuss it with anyone except my husband.

norose4 Yes, lets start a list:

Chocolates
Cuddles
Hugs
Kisses
Loving phrases
Flowers
Treats out
Complements
Chocolates
Holding hands
Fun
Chocolates

:-)

Yorkie, I see Chocolate is high on your list, what do you do with it ? (if the answer is boring, say nothing, let our imaginations run riot )

Lots of things you can do with chocolate as well as eating it wobblybits ! Same with cream or ice cream which can be fun. Love the ice cream with a chocolate flake in it. :-) Chocolate mousse lasts longer though.

Brilliant girls I'm liking the list, especially the chocolate ones , can include hubby or not so a win win situation, I love reading, but think he might object if I tried to combine the two .... unless !!?

I enjoy sex more now than when I was younger and had to worry about the children being in the house! I have had younger partners which I prefer. I was married for 24 years but our sex life was boring. I'm a lot less inhibited now and not having to worry about pregnancy is a bonus! This reminds me of something Ken Bruce of Radio 2 said years ago - one of his children came in while they were "doing it" and he pretended that he was inspecting the headboard for woodworm! Made me laugh!

I am still trying to get over the image of ice cream with a flake. Cold shower didn't help.