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Bit upset over work issues

(58 Posts)
Sallywally1 Wed 30-Mar-22 17:01:07

I retired from my nearly full time medical secretarial role after eight years, I felt good about myself at the end there and felt satisfied I had made a success.

I then applied for a ten hour a week job at a local surgery (I got my state pension) and feel I don’t fit in. The manager says I am slow, I took too long to open the post. I have what I think is arthritis in my hand which makes movement difficult. I have tried to be friendly and obliging but feel a couple of people don’t like me. Some of their methods are difficult for me to pick up. I really feel the sack is on the cards and feel so down. The little bit of money was useful, but I just feel so disappointed with myself and wish I had never gone there. Sorry for the own!

sodapop Wed 30-Mar-22 17:31:52

That's a shame Sallywally I can understand you feeling disappointed but I don't think you need to. Things do change and move on so often we are suited to different things as we get older. After a working life in nursing and social care I now have a voluntary role in a small library and I love it.

Septimia Wed 30-Mar-22 17:41:39

It is a shame, but you don't deserve to feel bad about it. I'd be inclined to talk to your manager and say that feel that you've bitten off a bit more than you can chew. That will open the way for you to resign, rather than being sacked, or the manager might even realise that they've expected too much of you too soon and give you a break.

Jump rather than being pushed, though - take control, you'll feel better for it. Regroup and look around for something different that you can enjoy.

Sallywally1 Wed 30-Mar-22 17:42:25

Meant to say sorry for the moan. It’s true, I am slow, but like to think I do things properly. I know the ‘talk’ is soon, which will begin ‘how do you feel you have settled in here’.

I should never have put myself forward, pride cometh etc!

Calendargirl Wed 30-Mar-22 17:42:41

It sounds like the manager was not on the interviewing panel.

Perhaps he/she thought the job should go to a younger person?And the difficulties with your hand don’t help obviously, plus it’s taking you a bit of time to pick up new ways.

Early days, but if you still feel miserable after a while, is the extra money worth the hassle?

Why not enjoy your retirement, if that proves to be the case?

Chestnut Wed 30-Mar-22 17:50:55

I had a similar problem some years ago. I had been very successful in my admin job and was highly praised. My computer skills were so good that people came to me for help. I got on with my colleagues very well and everyone gathered for my leaving meal and said how sorry they were I was leaving. Then I left the area and took a part-time job elsewhere. They weren't happy with me and asked me to leave! I was gobsmacked, wrote a very strong reply letter defending myself, but left anyway with my feathers very ruffled. I was upset by their attitude but I guess you can't win them all.

Maybe your new job is high pressure and you are expected to work very quickly? I would try elsewhere in a medical role that is not so demanding, maybe in an office rather than with the public?

Sussexborn Wed 30-Mar-22 17:53:50

If you can manage without the money it might be better to hand in your notice, rather than be edged out. Working on reception is pretty complex and it takes time to learn the ropes. The manager doesn’t appear to be helping or supporting you

crazyH Wed 30-Mar-22 18:08:51

To be unhappy in your job/workplace is the worst thing ever. You obviously don’t actually need the job, so just give your notice and leave.
In between separation and divorce, I worked in a Surgery. The Doctor took advantage of my background, and got me to see patients and complete Disability Claim Forms etc,( the part mainly reserved for the GP to complete). After 2 days, I rang the Family Practitioner Committee and made a complaint. They came over the next day and took him to task about it. I left ( fortunately, I didn’t need the job). I later learnt, that he had left and returned to his homeland.
I do feel for you. Don’t let anyone make you feel this way. Just leave Sallywally

Nannarose Wed 30-Mar-22 21:43:06

It is always difficult to know in such situations. Should they find a way to accommodate you, or are you really too slow for such a job?
Would you fit in after awhile, or are they really difficult to get on with?
I do think GP surgeries can be difficult places to work. They don't have the clear hierarchy of other NHS workplaces, but they are under a great deal of stress. Practice managers can be so variable as well.
You say you have your State Pension, but don't make it clear if you have other income or savings. I would broadly agree with those who say 'leave' - to me it sounds as if you have reached a point where the job is doing you no good. There is a deal of difference in winding down in a job you are familiar with, and taking up a new one.
You may be able to pick up a few hours of other, more congenial work if you look around.
I wish you luck.

Hithere Wed 30-Mar-22 21:58:41

"It’s true, I am slow, but like to think I do things properly."

Different jobs have different expectations
You may not be a good fit for this office

Does this job require a fast pace?

CanadianGran Wed 30-Mar-22 22:18:14

It is a blow to the ego when you think you are doing well, and hear otherwise. Try to understand that not all jobs will be a good fit, and there is somewhere else that will value your skills.

Try not to stress about it too much, and start looking for something else.

Shandy57 Wed 30-Mar-22 22:40:40

So sorry to read this, but if your work place is anything like our local surgery, the pressure is on everyone and speed is of the essence. Do not allow them to sap your confidence through less than constructive criticism, resign and find something in a less pressurised environment.

Do you think it might be RSI after all those years of keying in? I was a secretary from 1973-81, then retrained as a lecturer. My fingers are bent now, like the keyboard!

GagaJo Wed 30-Mar-22 23:28:00

Not every employee/employer combination works. I had a horrific experience in a job once, 4 years ago. It should have been a fit. I knew my boss before I went to work for her, but it was just awful. The company was terrible and the senior managers were bullies. I didn't really want to have to leave and look for another job so quickly, but had to really because I was so unhappy.

I found another job and started it the day after leaving the horrible one and it was great.

Jody1234 Thu 31-Mar-22 01:48:51

Sally, I would seriously think about packing the job in. You have worked hard all your life, been a success at what you do, you honestly don't need to put yourself through this. If you can afford it walk away, life is very short and we only live once.
Good luck, I hope you find a solution.

Whitewavemark2 Thu 31-Mar-22 07:43:44

Honestly if you can afford to do so I would think seriously about retiring full time.

Life, in any case should always be about balance and there is definitely a much more enjoyable existence outside of paid employment.

I loved my working life, but oh how much more stress free and relaxed is my retirement. Each day is spent entirely as I wish.

Do think about it and embrace the chance to live life to the full.

Galaxy Thu 31-Mar-22 07:47:13

I am so jealous about the way you have described that WW, I am in my fifties, I think you strive on stress when you are younger, or I certainly did, but now it just all seems so much effort and I can feel myself dosengaging which isnt good either.

Nonogran Thu 31-Mar-22 08:21:16

In younger days had two spells in the GP practice arena.
The first was absolutely dreadful. There were parochial and bullying staff and a complicit bitch of a Practice Manager. The doctors were toothless & uncaring. I was so glad, after more than two years of worry, to triumphantly hand in my notice.

The second was as a peripatetic trainer within surgeries throughout the UK. I enjoyed my job & had good employers but I never ever visited what I thought of as a “happy practice.” Some had a terrible atmosphere, lots of bitching amongst staff & indifferent managers.

In your shoes OP I would hand in your notice. It’s just not worth the worry.
Needless to say, I found fulfilment & appreciation in the two jobs I took afterwards & retired from the Civil Service on the crest of a wave,
Chin up & good luck,

JaneJudge Thu 31-Mar-22 08:29:44

Please just hand in your notice and leave.

Sign off sick if you need to temporarily but make the decision to leave and do not go back.

I have recently been through similar. You are not slow, their expectations of you are unrealistic. The working atmosphere is unpleasant. It will not change.

I stuck my last job out for far too long and I felt mentally unwell when I finally left. Your health is more important, including your mental health. There are loads of nicer jobs available at the moment. Apply for one of them instead smile

JaneJudge Thu 31-Mar-22 08:31:18


I am so jealous about the way you have described that WW, I am in my fifties, I think you strive on stress when you are younger, or I certainly did, but now it just all seems so much effort and I can feel myself dosengaging which isnt good either.

I got accused of not listening properly to instructions in my last job but there was so much drama and toxicity I think I actually switched off to it all blush seriously, who needs extra stress in their life? I certainly don't

H1954 Thu 31-Mar-22 11:33:22

I had a similar issue a few years ago. I'd taken my occupational pension but didn't qualify for the state pension at the time. So, I applied for a job in a local supermarket.......big mistake!

I was employed part time on either the wet fish, fresh meat, hot food to go, or deli counters. I never knew until I arrived at work which one I was allocated to on that shift and the rest of them in the team were so cliquey. One would train me with on a section but then a few days later smears me else would say I was doing something wrong, they all had different methods and ways of doing things. I soon noticed that whatever section I was on I always got lumbered with taking the rubbish out at the end of the shift, the team were clearly taking liberties. They would all stand around chatting whilst I did the final clean down of all sections.
I didn't stay long, I had far more self respect that to allow them to use me and in their power games. Yes, the extra money was useful but not at the cost of job satisfaction.

Growing0ldDisgracefully Thu 31-Mar-22 11:36:28

It's them, not you - you were successful in your previous job so don't let this sap your confidence in yourself. Find something else to do, paid or voluntary which will give you the satisfaction this post isn't giving you. You have only one life, so make it enjoyable, not a misery. Good luck with the next step.

Camelotclub Thu 31-Mar-22 11:44:12

I've had jobs where I've fitted in well and others where I've felt like a fish out of water and that everyone was looking at me as if I was an alien. It's the luck of the draw and usually nothing to do with performance, that's just used as an excuse. I'd get out of there and try something else or just enjoy retirement.

Cossy Thu 31-Mar-22 11:48:22

I think your work mates and manager sound like a bunch of unprofessional and rude judgement tossers !! Don’t give them the satisfaction of sacking you, walk away immediately and if you need/want to work take your talents where they are appreciated ! Good luck x grin

Lin663 Thu 31-Mar-22 11:56:14

Sally Wally1 don’t be despondent…I briefly worked at my local GP surgery and found most (not all) of the staff to be a bunch of bitches…it’s not you, it’s them. I resigned - life is too short to hang around nasty people.

jaylucy Thu 31-Mar-22 11:57:16

Sadly, I experienced something similar to you when working for the NHS.
It seems to be an excepted way to deal with new staff.
Sometimes it may be caused by jealousy, Often by the person that had a say in if you would be employed in the first place!
Rather than just say straight at the end of your trial period that sorry, you are not right for the job, they'd rather make your life uncomfortable and hope you leave of your own accord.
I was dragged through a disciplinary meeting, unaccompanied - something that seems common in the Health Authority I was working for - I was even warned by my predecessor it was likely to happen.
If you have a problem with your hands, they should find a way and supply you with equipment that could help you. They should give you time to learn their system as well.
I think you may be better looking for another position elsewhere instead of putting up with this toxic behaviour and on the way out of the door, make sure that you make a complaint to the practice manager in the first instance about your treatment, If it is the practice manager that is nasty, complain to the GP partners.
There are jobs out there that would love to have you, with your experience and you deserve, as we all do, to be treated well.