Would this irritate you?

Glammanana - we had a house called Eyrefield Lodge on Damhead Lane, Willaston. I used to work out of the Teachers' Centre in New Brighton. It certainly is a small world!

We go to Willaston for the rabbit straw and food for the school pet's it is a lovely part of The Wirral,I can't remember the Teachers Centre but DH will prob know where it was,not many place's he does not know,specially the local pubs

Greatnan thanks lovely lady

Grannylin, yes I have come close to what you suggest (can't really afford to do otherwise!)
I have my own friends, interests and social life AND my own bedroom!
Greatnan this is my second attempt to say thanks for a lovely offer I don't know where that post went! Do enjoy your trip to N.Z.

OH! it was there all the time!

I've just come back to this thread, and find it strangely comforting that so many of you have had an experience so similar to mine: No real financial support from your former husband upon divorce, no pension rights based on his pension, and most significantly - a man with no real interest in his own children or grandchildren.
It always seemed to me that every other divorced woman in the world had got half of everything (at the very least!), and ergo, I had been far too much of a wimp to demand my rights! Good to know that's not actually true, and I too feel pride in having made it on my own post-divorce, and providing well for my children (even though life has gone belly-up over the past 2 years due to a life-change gamble that didn't work out, but what the heck - nothing venture, nothing gained, and being at the bottom of the trough means there's only one way to go!)
As to the fathers incapable of giving a damn about their offspring ... it's so sad that so many men seem to be like that, but I do find it comforting that my ex is not the only useless father out there. Sad for our children, but at least they had damn good mothers! Cheers to us all!

Barrow - I am sad for you [flowers]

Strangely, we live in a village called Barrow!

I have heard several women say that their husband would never be mean or vindictive if they split up - my advice would be to get a solicitor anyway and get everything in writing. Call me cynical, but I have seen so many women left nearly destitute while their ex-husband lives it up with his new (probably younger) woman.

I have seen some very good financial advice on other threads. When I worked as a financial consultant in Brussels, I gave seminars on financial planning for women. These were well-heeled ex-pats, mostly married to successful business men. I was staggered to find how many of these presumably intelligent women had no idea about their family's finances. Some did not have their own bank account, did not know the name of their bank, did not know if their husband had adequate life insurance, left their husband to fill in all forms. One American woman said she thought it was morbid to talk about life insurance.
Some of the men were equally misinformed - one was earning about £100,000 p.a. I asked him what life cover he had - it was £250,000 which he thought was more than adequate. He had two children who were at expensive private schools and would need supporting for at least ten years. His wife had never worked and had no money of her own. I pointed out that she would have around £25,000 a year (he was self-employed and had no pension plans). I asked him he spent £75,000 a year on himself and of course he vehemently denied it, so I asked him how his wife was going to manage on such a reduced income. His reply was that she was an attractive woman and would soon find another husband!

I am sure that all Gransnetters are completely au fait with their family finances and know exactly where they would stand in the sad event of widowhood or divorce.

greatnan what times the next trian???? I will lost of and my inflatble friend!! (long story,previous thread) lol

lol I havnt been drinking hic!! I meant to say! I have lots of hic! just packing my bag !

biker, behave! Halloween is over now! Save it for New Year .

Can you give me a clue, bikergran? I am a new member!

biker are you still having problems with your inflatable friend ? I thought you bought a puncture outfit ?

This thread is sounding very strange now -- pompa will be back soon to add his tuppence worth I expect. He admits that he's always lurking somewhere... hellooo

Greatnan, if you want some background into how crazy/imaginative some of us are, I recommend this thread:

www.gransnet.com/forums/am_i_being_unreasonable/1190010-Anyone-fancy-a-flight-over-PENDLE-HILL-tonight-Broomsticks-at-the-ready

or this:
www.gransnet.com/forums/am_i_being_unreasonable/1188873--to-create-a-virtual-camper-van-hop-aboard-everyone

Don't let this put you off - there are some sane contributors here.

No problems, Annobel, I am a veteran of several ex-pat forums and may even have contributed to some of the madness.