Katyj we had nearly the same situation in my husband's family. His mum had a series of TIAs and was sent home too early. We had to move in with her as she was a different person to the woman who went in.
Since then, loads of things have gone wrong and although she's improved to the extent that we can move out and are back at home (15 mins away), we are back and forth all the time. She has two lots of help but it's still stressful as we are constantly waiting for another crisis.
As we were both working when she came out, my husband took an offered redundancy package. It will affect his pension but I don't believe we could have done what she needs if he hadn't done this.
The medics won't speak to us unless she gives permission. She thinks it's "unnecessary to bother us" so everything we get is second hand.
In fact, she is independent minded and wants to be in control of all her medical stuff (which is great) except she can't process it properly anymore and spends hours worrying about it, trying to unscramble it with us, and generally forgetting who she's told what. If the doctors would give an appointment time my husband could arrange to be there but she doesn't want him there all day.
I'd say, based on our experience, make sure she is stable before she comes home. She will say she feels better, but won't understand the stress it puts on both you, Katyj and, through lack of proper communication, potentially her own recovery.
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