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Do your kids remember your Wedding Anniversary? Do you expect them to?

(121 Posts)
JackyB Wed 04-Jan-17 11:29:51

I always gave my parents a card, and on their 25th a present, but my children say they weren't there when we married so what has it got to do with them. I suppose they are right, in a way. I prefer not to think about wedding anniversaries, quite honestly, but I am still miffed that my sister-in-law has never once mentioned it, and had found something better to do when I invited her out for dinner for our 25th.

So - mixed feeling here. How do other families stand on the matter?

Daddima Wed 04-Jan-17 17:04:04

No, and no.
The Bodach and I have escaped to Paris on our last three " biggies", and the youngsters weighed in with some yoyos to spend.

Auntieflo Wed 04-Jan-17 17:20:26

Our wedding anniversary is in September, as is DS1and DD, so we usually send them cards. DS2 wedding anniversary is on Valentine's day.
We always used to send cards to each other, until about 5 years ago, when we both forgot. So after that we bought a card, that we both liked, and then give it an airing each year. Daft eh?
I think because my mum was a great card sender, that we have / had, carried on the tradition.

joannapiano Wed 04-Jan-17 17:27:01

No,we don't get cards from our family-and that's fine with us. We buy each other cards.
We did ,however, get a card from our cat and rabbit last year.( Thank you DH!)

annodomini Wed 04-Jan-17 17:43:00

It isn't relevant to me, not that ex would have remembered it even if he were still around. But I do remember my parents' wedding anniversary - 17th February - even though both are long gone.

POGS Wed 04-Jan-17 18:11:03

No.

To be fair I don't bother with wedding anniversaries either so no problem.

I do however admit to giving cards and gifts if I am invited to 'a do' but that is out purely out of courtesy.

Penstemmon Wed 04-Jan-17 18:18:22

To me any relationship anniversary celebration is between the couple! If you make it to some significant numbers then members of your immediate family may feel like celebrating with you but to be honest it is not a big deal for me! We did not do family celebrations for any of ours & we are 5 years away from Golden!

M0nica Wed 04-Jan-17 20:08:20

Mine mark big anniversaries, but are never sure of the exact date.

SueDonim Wed 04-Jan-17 20:16:02

I'm not sure quite why anyone would expect children to mark their parents' wedding anniversary, unless the children were actually at the wedding (which might well be the case nowadays!).

Special anniversaries are a bit different, I marked my parents 25/40th anniversaries, but annually, no, I wouldn't expect it. It's a day for the two people involved to celebrate.

I have sent cards for my own children's anniversaries but even that is petering out as cards send abroad go astray and another son doesn't even remember his own anniversary! grin

rosesarered Wed 04-Jan-17 20:18:33

When we got married we thought that both Mothers would send a card on our anniversary ( but they didn't) so maybe it wasn't done?
Our DC will send cards and presents for big anniversaries, silver, pearl and ruby in the past and in three years it will be Golden ( should we make it) grin
We don't buy cards any more for ourselves, but flowers instead and a lovely meal out.

rosesarered Wed 04-Jan-17 20:19:37

Oh, forgot...we do send cards to our married DC.

Rinouchka Wed 04-Jan-17 20:22:46

We would not expect our children to remember our wedding anniversary, except the special ones. We had a wonderful 40th with children and grandchildren all on holiday together, paid by us.
Neither do we send cards to them on their wedding anniversary, but we do phone.

I certainly agree that anniversaries are for the couple concerned.

Ankers Wed 04-Jan-17 20:24:38

My DH and I barely remember. I certainly dont expect others to.
One of our bridesmaids sends us a card every year, bless her.

Penstemmon Wed 04-Jan-17 20:41:25

Actually I told a fib! I just remembered that when DH & I were away for weekend (ruby wedding anniversary) DDs filled a multi photo frame they knew was in our house (waiting for pics of DGC!) with pics of our wedding, the invite and Order of Service! Cheapskates! grin

NotTooOld Wed 04-Jan-17 22:10:30

No. Why should they - they weren't there. I do remember theirs, though.

MargaretX Wed 04-Jan-17 22:26:12

We don't celebrate our anniverseries I even forget how many years its been. The main thing is we're happy and contented and we lived many years together before being married. The piece of paper is really not important.

Pigglywiggly Thu 05-Jan-17 06:40:43

I don't even know the month my parents got married!

goose1964 Thu 05-Jan-17 09:38:16

No & I can't remember my inlaws either, or my parents either ( although since Mum is no longer with us it's neither here nor there)

rosemaybud Thu 05-Jan-17 09:45:56

Our children don't remember our anniversary but I don't expect them to. Though I am giving them yearly reminders of our 50th which will be in 2020. I have told them that although it's customary for children to send their parents on a round the world cruise for their 50th, I would prefer to go to Venice on the Orient Express!!

Witzend Thu 05-Jan-17 09:47:41

Usually not, and TBH I sometimes have a job to remember it myself!
Doesn't bother me if/when Dh occasionally forgets - until later that day!

The one we did make a thing of was the silver - went to Prague for 5 days.
Seems so long ago now!
But I can remember when it was just 10 - and I felt so old having been married ten years! Dh bought me a lovely watch which I haven't managed to lose or put through the washing machine yet...

cangran Thu 05-Jan-17 09:48:59

Apart from taking us to the theatre on our 40th, our two children don't acknowledge our anniversary. It's very interesting that many others seem not to either as I thought, as ours has not been the happiest of marriages, that anniversaries being ignored was just their way of being diplomatic and not reminding us! It will be our 50th next year and I'm rather dreading it. I am happy to go out with the family but certainly don't want a big do. I'm sure my sister and some friends will start questioning me about our plans before long (one has already).

Leah50 Thu 05-Jan-17 09:49:17

I wouldn't expect our daughters to remember our Anniversary, we don't bother with it ourselves, but this year is our 50th, & they would like us all "to do something", no idea what yet.

Jan51 Thu 05-Jan-17 09:49:27

DH and I always wish each other happy anniversary and used to go out for a meal but never buy cards or presents except on 25th and 40th. Our parents always sent us cards. SIL always sends a card. DDs send a text. We had a party for family and friends for our 25th and went out for a family meal for our 40th. DDs are quite proud of the fact that we've been married for 44 yrs.

Kim19 Thu 05-Jan-17 09:51:04

Yes, happily both my adult sons acknowledge my wedding anniversary but only with a simple telephone call and the date is 'slipped in' casually. I'm VERY gratified by it. Warm feeling........

Lilylilo Thu 05-Jan-17 09:51:28

No and neither do we until probably a few days later!

Teddy123 Thu 05-Jan-17 09:52:37

No. I don't remember theirs either. I often forget too.
I only remembered my sister's last year because it was their 50 years GOLD and we were invited to the party.
So not a big deal in our family.