New user? Old user? Lurker? We'd love your views.

I'm fairly new. I occasionally respond to a thread, but basically I just don't have time to read all posts. I do feel sometimes that the original poster asks for advice but just doesnt want to take it!

That happens quite a lot, Damdee, unfortunately. As I said earlier, if someone asks for your opinion, they don't necessarily want you to give it. Some just want their own opinions validated or their ego stroked.

You can end up being accused of being all manner of mean if you don't realise that, even if your intention was to offer practical advice.

Maggie, yes, and then sometimes the new poster leaves because they did not get the responses they wanted.

Damdee it's just not always possible to read all the posts on a thread and sometimes you could post a reply and repeat something someone else has posted.

Don't worry about it though.
If it's worth saying, it's worth saying twice.

I'm very new and have only posted once - I was and still am very wary of forums as I have heard so much about them being aggressive/critical. I don't have and have never had any social media, again because I've seen what it has done to friends and family - either stress them out/anger them or make them feel inadequate.

I appreciated all of the replies to my post, even the ones that sounded quite harsh as people had taken time to read and offer advice.
I am very sensitive and find it hard dealing with people in general. I made sure I thanked posters on my dilemma but I haven't gone back to update it yet as I'm unsure of what to say or what is happening withe the ongoing problem at the minute.
I have a had a brief look at some other posts and I would say what stops me doing more is lack of time. I only have access to the internet on my pc and don't have a tablet or smart phone so when I'm on the pc I'm usually working and have little time to do other things.

I am a returner. I used to post regularly on a variety of threads from light-hearted to political. However I gave up posting when I felt that some folk were almost 'stalking' ..sound a bit dramatic … but no matter how innocuous my comment the same 2 or 3 people would make opposing comments. Now I can enjoy a good debate as much as anyone but it got very tedious!

Nice to see you back again PECS

I have also picked up on the cliques on Gransnet.I have no idea how friends are made on here as I haven't connected with anyone at all.
Some people seem very rude and aggressive on certain threads when others have different views. I feel this does not show Gransnet in a very good light. I expected more maturity quite honestly.

bluebirdwsm or at least a level of debate beyond the primary playground... I think that was what I found frustrating.. the petty bickering.. huge generalisations with no evidence to back it up...almost like being in the HoC grin

oops I used the wrong brackets for ...been away too long

Hi PECS ?
Good to have you back!

Now I can enjoy a good debate as much as anyone
PECS Welcome back; I've missed your debating skills.
Remember me? Frankie "Strangers in the Night"; "Dooby, dooby, doo!" You didn't like the way I modified that line so you gave me a BIG serve!
All is forgiven, although obviously not forgotten, so let's start debating; anything you like! OZ? Btw, what does the acronym stand for?
OoRoo

I have also picked up on the cliques on Gransnet
bluebirdswm So have I, except I call them "Clans"
OoRoo

Nice to see you posting PECS

I am on for the information, particularly around health. I am very reluctant to join the forums however because of some of the responses I have seen.

Some of the posts on this thread just serve to illustrate how cliquey GN is! I have been a reader for several years, but I seldom post as I'm put off by the "look at me I'm in a privileged group and you are just an outsider" thing. I've also been quite disturbed by the sheer nastiness of some posters (and not necessarily just on the political forum).

I am now going back down behind the parapet ....

Gulligranny I agree with you. I've come to think that I'm invisible where some posters are concerned. But I do love reading the posts on this site.

bluebirdwsm ... Some people seem very rude and aggressive on certain threads when others have different views. I feel this does not show Gransnet in a very good light. I expected more maturity quite honestly.

I think many of us feel the same.

I joined Gransnet when I first became a new grandmother, in the hope of gaining advice/tips from those already with a wealth of experience as grandparents. Sadly, not all in the GN community are here to offer constructive advice. However, I decided to stick around, as I've come to recognize those who are genuinely here to help, and those who are here for other reasons.

I notice that many (not all) of the 'not-so-helpful' posters are from another very popular website, and have no experience of being a grandparent. Of course, there's nothing wrong with hearing views from the 'other side', so to speak. Indeed, we often need to hear a different perspective on certain matters, but it would far more helpful to everyone if certain posters didn't become rude and aggressive. It's so unnecessary.

It’s very quiet - probably like how mumsnet was 20 years ago.

There are quite a few negative comments on here about GN, which is what you would expect on a public forum, as everyone's perceptive and experience will be different.

I have experienced negativity, but it has been far outweighed by the positive experience and much warmth from some posters. Having been stung in the past, I just stay with the threads I feel safe in. Weak, pathetic? I don't really care!
There are thousands on this site, so of course there are many times when our posts go unnoticed, but I don't take it personally.

What does annoy me is when someone actually asks me a question, I respond and the posters never replies. That is rude! ?

What do you mean by ‘quiet’ Kandinsky? I don’t understand what you mean, sorry.

Slow?
Not many posters?

Hello Gransnet, I think gransnet probably reflects the nature of the human race generally.

There are so many lovely, kind, generous people, and sadly, many foul mouthed, bitter characters with angry shrivelled hearts.
Feel sorry for latter group, their minds and lives are so sad, tormented even....
The first group are lucky, empathetic and sprinkle “feel-good” all around.

Anyway, so main reason I don’t post, I’m usually too late!! My opinion has already been posted on whichever subject many times by the time I read it!
Is there any way you could incorporate a ‘like’ button? So posters can see how many people have read the post and liked it? And a ‘not like’, to show we sympathise, but won’t comment,as it’s already been said.....
Thanks for the site, I only found it about three months ago, I really enjoy it. I’ve got 6 sons and 8 grandchildren so far, so find lots to be interested in! ???

Good ideas Janiepops.

Posters have been asking for a like, button for years, to no avail.