My son, Annie's daughter and all taken too young

Thank you for your support, I am new to Gransnet - but it seems a wonderful place to share so much

It is absolutely lovely, sandie.
Just be aware though, that the forums are open, and what is posted here can end up on Facebook, Twitter, and in newspapers. So... Its just something to remember, as it's easy to disclose things you may not be happy to be shared elsewhere.

Welcome, Sandianne.?

I'm really struggling at the moment. How can I not when I've lost my best friend. As poorly as she was, my daughter always looked after me as best she could: she was my rock.. cancer strips away almost everything that's 'normal' in the end. Friends fall by the wayside, it takes over. Then, when its over, there is nothing left. No comfort. No joy. Its just too bloody hard to deal with.

MissA your last sentence is absolutely correct - the death of someone loved and cherished at any age is hard, but when it happens to someone young it seems unbearably so. Too hard to deal with as you say. And yet.....the days go on, the grief changes and life eventually develops new rythms - and the grief doesn't go away, but somehow it is borne.
On Sunday my grandson, now almost eight, was playing rugby for his school. After scoring his second (match winning) try he turned and winked at my daughter; who promptly dissolved into a sobbing mess. She said in that moment her son so resembled his late father that her grief devoured her. The moment passed and life resumed, but it was a reminder of how grief ebbs and flows through days and months and years. It's been almost eight years since she was widowed.

Thank you, grannyactivist. I'm at a low ebb, I think. I lost my mum this time last year, plus I'm tired out physically - and I have a cold that feels almost like flu! And boils, all over my face! What a picture!
You're right, in that it ebbs and flows.. sometimes its almost bearable. Sometimes not. Early days though, I know. Thank you though.

Oh ladies, I am so very sorry to read your very poignant posts. Of course I have lost people close to me, but the death of a child is imo the worst thing that can befall anyone, closely followed by the death of a beloved husband. My heart and love goes out to all of you at these unhappy times.? xx