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What do you want ‘ professionals’ to call you?

(116 Posts)
Daddima Tue 30-Apr-19 12:42:28

Following on from ‘what do you want professionals to wear?’, I remember we had new nursery teachers who said they had been taught in college that to be called by their first name was more ‘ friendly’. I disagreed, and went for Mrs/Ms.
When working in Marie Curie, I noticed that calling patients by first names was the norm, but I know that my mother and wee auntie much preferred to be addressed as ‘Mrs’.
( I don’t care, as I’m older than everybody!)

MamaCaz Thu 02-May-19 15:44:28

I think using no form of address is usually the safest option in a shop nowadays, Phoenix, though I don't dislike 'Madam' (or Sir) to such an extent that I would even think of complaining if someone addressed me that way. I just find it outdated.

The problem is that IMO it no longer seems appropriate for a young woman.
I doubt if any us would be likely to use it to address someone that we guessed was in their twenties, or even thirties, would we? Well I certainly wouldn't, anyway.
This means that the speaker has to make a decision based on how old someone looks to them, which can open up a whole can of worms. ?

MamaCaz Thu 02-May-19 15:48:30

A nice, polite, 'Good morning/afternoon/evening'. Can I help you?' is always a good start. Or even a friendly 'Hello' instead of the more formal greetings.

Jacinta55 Thu 02-May-19 16:26:36

From people other than friends and relatives I would expect to be called Mrs. I'm not keen on the current vogue for informality.

M0nica Thu 02-May-19 18:09:59

It is not what I am called, it is the tone and expression of voice used to say it. If I get that patronising 'talking to an old lady voice' I may make it very clear that it is not acceptable.

instagran Thu 02-May-19 21:00:23

Hear hear, Monica - spot on as usual!

instagran Thu 02-May-19 21:04:14

Bijou - a belated very Happy Birthday! You often make me smile with your words of wisdom. ???

Rufus2 Fri 03-May-19 11:51:33

duly put on a board above my bed
Dottydots: Good idea, provided it's correct! wink Once, I was returned to my ward bed after an op. for acute pancreatitis and gall bladder removal and when I surfaced, noticed the board said "Neil O'Reilly"; Not me !; until told it actually said "Nil Orally! i.e. total starvation, for one week; standard post op. treatment! sad Mind you, my appetite wasn't what it used to be until fish-and-chips was back on the menu! party

watermeadow Fri 03-May-19 18:28:50

When my very prickly mother was admitted to hospital the nurse said, “Longname Longname Longname! What shall we call you?”
Mother replied,”You may call me Mrs Surname”

Tweedle24 Sat 04-May-19 10:38:09

I don’t understand the objection to ‘madam’. Yes, it now has some dodgy connotations but, it is only on a par with calling a man ‘sir’.

goldengirl Sat 04-May-19 11:32:02

I quite like being called by my first name; it makes me feel young!!!! Mind you call centre callers don't get away with it! I'm also quite happy to be called 'Mrs' too. However I find 'love', sweetheart etc rather patronising but I appreciate that it's just a habit for some people.

notanan2 Sat 04-May-19 12:02:56

It is not what I am called, it is the tone and expression of voice used to say it. If I get that patronising 'talking to an old lady voice' I may make it very clear that it is not acceptable.

That is the problem with Madam.. it is always accompanied by that tone..

SueDonim Sat 04-May-19 12:28:33

I got used to being called Madam when we lived abroad, just as Dh got used to being called Boss. Those are terms of respect in that particular culture. Our young Dd was called Miss or sometimes Princess.

I did draw the line at being called Mummy, though! That's another term of respect but as I already have four children, I felt really didn't want any more. grin

Alexa Sat 04-May-19 13:47:48

I have taken to writing my first name on those queer electronic writing pads that I am asked to sign for deliveries at the door. It's an enjoyable challenge to make a legible mark of any sort.

Tweedle24 Mon 06-May-19 10:45:15

Just as a follow-up to the ‘madam’ thing, I was in church yesterday and an American visitor called me ‘madam’. It sounded polite and respectful.

Alexa Thu 09-May-19 11:28:27

I'd have liked that too Tweedle. During the war when I was a small girl a French officer enchantingly addressed me as "Mademoiselle".