Overweight Husbands

ages ago I read that single women live longer than married women and married men live longer than unmarried men

Pamela That doesn't seem right!
You're saying that if a DH becomes an EX and unmarried, his allotted life-span is suddenly curtailed, whereas I would think that being freed of criticism and apron strings, his single lifestyle would bring on peace and contentment and therefore increased longevity!
I'm no trick cyclist, but you know it makes sense!
Cheers!

Rufus sadly not the way it works, the now single lady goes off and has a whale of a time and doesn’t have to do the cooking , cleaning and ironing for 2 people, or remember all of the Birthdays and buy presents for his family as well as hers.
And the newly single man, sits and wonders how he will manage to eat anything as he has never bothered to try to cook anything apart from beans and spag Bol. He will spend his days wondering what he did to deserve such a horrid wife! And will probably sit in a corner and shrivel up.
Heard today that a traditional white wedding dress could be to do with the fact that ‘all household appliances were white.........’ hmmmmm.

Hi, men do need more cals than women, and seeing as you like healthy food, why not make good wholesome meals and serve him large portions to fill him up?

SW ready meals are mostly spicy and no, not very filling for a large appetite.

Good choices are lean mince, chicken, eggs, loads of veg, hi fibre lower cal bread, fresh fruit and SKYR yogurts.

There lots of 79-99 calorie chewy bars...very nice and take a little while to eat too.

Good luck.

Well if he doesn`t take your advice ExD tell him you are going to insure him as you will outlive him.
THAT maybe an eyeopener for him.
It`s the old saying really....you can lead a horse to water but you can`t force it to drink.

DH is as happy as Larry with the meals I serve up, many from Slimming magazine. It is all the extra he consumes when not at the dining table.

Rufus perhaps the ex husband retains the benefits of the married state???

trustgone '*It`s the old saying really....you can lead a horse to water but you can`t force it to drink.* - unfortunately this is the problem for many overweight men I know (and increasingly, women) - they do, drink, willingly.

Very glad for sure that my OH is a social and occasional drinker. We BOTH carry extra weight - but that is due to portion control.

Bluebellwould

Is he diabetic because a serious case of the munchies is one of the symptoms.

As is an under active thyroid gland. It is well worth trying to get him to seek help.
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3112506/#:~:text=Thyroid%20hormones%20are%20known%20to,gain%20%5B3%2C%204%5D.

Its obvious there are a huge number of couples in the same situation. DH eats up the healthy meals, then goes off and indulges in sweet fatty snacks - just because he feels like it. Strangely it makes me feel less of a failure (and I do feel I've failed him when he's so overweight - no let's say it - FAT) because I know what I feed him is healthy.
Last night - Sunday lunch was beef and potatoes, carrot and cabbage with one small Yorkshire pudding (not home made which are nicer) followed by fruit. This morning I find an empty fruit bowl - he's eaten 4 bananas as well as the apples and pears.
Not all that bad - but its the sheer volume. I'd be on the loo all night - but not him.
So I carry on, cooking slimming meals and watching him pig out.

This morning I find an empty fruit bowl - he's eaten 4 bananas as well as the apples and pears

That’s plain greed, ExD. Nothing to do with appetite or hormones or any of the other excuses he might come up with.
If he’s eating 3 or 4 adequate meals a day, there’s no reason to pig out at other times.

How would he react if you showed him this thread?

What does he do? Sounds like boredom eating and similar to when I stopped smoking. Maybe he needs something to to do to keep his mind and hands occupied.

He sounds like a real glutton - I don't know how you can bear it!

beans and spag Bol

Oopsadaisy4 Now what's wrong with that? One of my favourites, second only to chish and fips and the frozen supermarket ones are just as nourishing; no cooking or washing-up! No need for a "pinny" with apron strings either!

Another sign of the times apropos your white frig.!
In days of yore, a marriage certificate was a bride's passport to acquiring a set of whitegoods and although there were probably as many hypocrites then as today, they chose virgin white for their wedding outfits and just as before there are probably as many, if not more, today carrying more than a bridal bouquet down the aisle!

Long live Spag. Bol.!
OoRoo

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When I look at "diet" recipes they look so uninteresting and put me off eating completely. My DD and SIL pile on the veg but they are so tasteless, I find them almost impossible to eat. Food is not just fuel it is meant to be enjoyed otherwise why bother.

My husband weighs twice as much as I do.
We both go for an annual checkup at the same practice: I have height, weight, BP, bloods etc. done.
According to him he's never been weighed. His weight has never been mentioned nor is it an issue. I think (know?) he's lying.
He's on statins and BP tablets but seems to think that means he can eat what he likes.
I found a multipack of crisps in his car but "they were for the guys at work."
My Mum used to tell me off for "letting him eat so much." We eat out of the same cupboards.
He's bought an automatic car because his knee hurts.
The nurse told me the stress of worrying about him was contributing to my raised cholesterol levels and I should let him get on with it, he's an adult. I told her he's also my future and I'd prefer him to be healthy.
Seriously, what can you do? So many similar stories on here ☹️

sparklingsilver where do you see these recipes? I buy Slimming magazine, the magazine of the Slimming World classes. They use ordinary everyday ingredients and their recipes include all kinds of different ethnic foods as well as everyday dishes like casseroles and stews, all well flavoured and very tasty.

A lot of the diet recipes in newspapers are related to strange diets that exclude food groups and try and convince you that courgetti is a satisfactory replacement for spaghetti and cauliflower mashed up is a substitute for rice.

My husband weighs twice as much as I do.

The nurse told me the stress of worrying about him was contributing to my raised cholesterol levels

V3ra You're the opposite of Mr, Jack and Mrs. Spratt then!

Seriously though; before I retired from full-time work we were having annual check-ups courtesy of the Company cardio and he reassured me that cholesterol levels never changed unless you suddenly went over the top and changed to an unhealthy diet. He never had me re-tested after the first was OK. That was 30 years ago and I don't believe I'm "lucky"; more a case of genes!
With all due respect to your nurse, I'd rather leave diagnosis to a doc.
Good Health. .

He might be eating because he's bored, ExD. You can't make the weight loss happen for him, he has to make the effort himself. You are doing your bit by serving up healthy meals. Piling on extra veg (not extra potatoes though) won't hurt, otherwise it's down to him. Does he have any hobbies? He needs something to take his mind off snacks.

If you do the shopping don’t bring high calorie snacks home, bring fruit instead let him munch on that, ration his alcohol too. At the end of the day he has got to “want“ to loose weight, it may be that only a major health scare makes him see sense, let’s hope it isn’t too disabling.

I'm fed up trying to get my husband to eat less. He's not grossly overweight but his stomach is growing. Every dinner is finished with a slice of bread to soak up sauce or gravy! I don't buy fatty foods cakes etc, only now and again as a treat.
Hes intelligent enough to know what he's doing. Leave him to it.
You can't make someone eat less. They have to want to.

Please try him with low carb food. My brother (6’) worked away a lot and was heading for 18 stone with all the eating out and 'handy' snacks. He's lost around 5 stones in 2 years by cutting way down on carbs. The first week was hard but after that it was really good. The Diet Doctor website gives a lot of information that may help. Good luck!

Davidhs if you read up thread you will find that the whole point is that the majority of us are not bringing home high calorie snacks and do have full fruit bowls. We are also serving balanced and nutritious meals.

As for 'rationing alcohol' any idea how one does that in a way that is not likely to drive the object of the exercise to drink even more, just to annoy?

I rarely drink at home and not often when out, and I do think that does perhaps limit the amount DH drinks. He is a relaxed evening drinker, not a pub visitor and usually doesn't drink alcohol when we eat out.

But at the end of the day he is a responsible adult and has to make his own decisions.

Davidhs fruit is not calorie- or sugar-free and the OP has already mentioned that her DH consumes industrial quantities of it.

I do a healthy online Tesco food shop and I produce healthy meals.
My husband goes to Morrisons for biscuits, lunches for work and Magnums, and eats after I've gone to bed (crumbs on the worktop!).
He's not a child, I cannot control him.
It annoys me that he has so little self-respect that he thinks it's ok to look like he does.
If I try and discuss it with him he gets defensive and we end up not speaking, so I don't bother any more. It's been going on for years.
His mum isn't happy about his weight either and she tackled him about it but to no avail.
He walks about 14,000 steps a day at work and he walks the dog twice a day so it's not lack of exercise.
It's purely down to portion control, he's just greedy ?

Just to add that one of my sons (fit and slim) owed me £1,000 some years ago and I offered to write off the debt if he took his dad in hand, took him to the gym etc.
He said he'd rather just pay me the money back, it would be easier ?