I can see no reason for you to discuss your feelings with your daughter. What would be the point? She can't do anything to resolve the situation for you bar limiting her mother in law's access to the baby and I truly hope that isn't something you see as a solution.
Instead of aggrieved about them having chats you're not involved in, can't you try to feel glad for your daughter that she's got some nearby support?
The only possible solution is to remove the geographical distance but even then I suspect that you might still struggle with feelings of resentment since this issue seems to run so deep with you.
I've always thought that the more people a child has who loves them and takes an interest in them, the better.
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