Should I be worried about DH?

My husband has dementia and, like you, I watched and waited for at least a year trying to choose the right time to say something. In the end he admitted there was a problem when he found he could no longer tell the time and was finding driving very worrying. There are many different forms of dementia and all have different initial aynptoms. I think you are doing the right thing by waiting for the right moment. However it proved a relief to both of us once my husband got a proper diagnosis and started to get support and some treatment. Do keep a note of all the odd problems he encounters and it is useful for you to read up about some of the symptoms. There are simple tests for dementia on line and eventually I persuaded my husband to do one of the paper based tests and showed the results to the GP when we finally went for an opinion. Good luck. I hope in the end it just proves to be a medical problem that can be solved!

There are various conditions where symptoms are similar to those in Dementia (infection, thyroid problems, anaemia). ‘Word finding’ difficulties are a symptom of dementia. Hubby definitely needs to see doc and either have this ruled out or refer to a memory clinic.
Suggest call the Admiral Nurse Dementia Helpline for expert advice 0800 888 6678

We finally managed to get DH to acknowledge that he had some problems. It is difficult if you cannot get them to acknowledge that they have a problem. They need to be willing to go along with it. However, we got an appointment quite quickly with the occupational therapist in the local hospital (memory clinic) and have an appointment with the consultant in a couple of weeks. The occupational therapist also made us an appointment at the Hearing Clinic, as I feel that this is part of the problem. And we have an appointment with the Talking clinic - assume that this is some sort of counselling service next week. At his regular diabetic check up, I mentioned all of this and it seems there could be the possibility that high sugar levels over the last six months have not helped. Have been very impressed with all the help we have been given. I now try to attend all appointments with DH, as otherwise he does not tell the truth to the Dr/nurse etc!!
So MamaCaz, best of luck - there is help out there! It is all very worrying as we all know how serious dementia can be...

MamaCaz, does your husband take Statins? My husband's memory went downhill after he started to take them. They also caused severe muscle pain so he was taken off them and his memory improved too. It might be worth reading the info leaflets of any drugs he takes regularly.

Hopefully you are worrying unnecessarily but I would suggest a trip to the GP. Three years ago I was in your position with my DH, a very gentle kind human being changing before our eyes. I suspected dementia but a period of severe anxiety and depression followed. The good news is while he’s on lots of medication, he has made a great recovery and I have my husband back. No dementia thank goodness.

No MamaCaz, you can't trick him into appointments but you could write to his doctor and explain your concerns or ring that surgery and describe the problem to them. Asking for advice always seems to go down well.

To me it is significant, Mamacaz, that you say the thought of getting old depresses your DH, perhaps this is something you could discuss frankly with him? Airing worries about the future does sometimes help.

Unfortunately, all the good advice about consulting a doctor may be very necessary, but the kind of memory loss you are describing might just be due to your DH no longer using his brain enough. Something very similar happened to my father in his old age, after my mother's death when he no longer had the daily stimulation of talking to her.

So please, have a word with you GP on your own, and ask him to check memory loss etc. next time your DH comes to see him. If the GP feels everything is normal, and perhaps even if he doesn't, is there any possibility of getting your husband to use his brain more? Crosswords, scrabble, Sudoku, going out to a club or meetings for the elderly? Joining a book club?
Using his brain more did help my father, who when we visited, or he came to us, would tell us the same story three times in 30 minutes, but after an hour or so of talk, would remember what we had been discussing and the repetitions stopped. I can see Starbird is on the same track here as I am. Do hope some of all the advice here is helpful.

He needs to see a professional, so a visit to the GP in the first instance. If he objects, see if you can discuss it with the GP. Some areas have community mental health nurses who can make a home assessment.

* goose1964 * - thanks for the translation! You will have to come and stay!

Hi. My husband's behaviour altered, his moods, memory etc then he dev loped a slight tremour eventually he went (after much asking) to the doctor. After many hospital visits and tests he's been diagnosed with Parkinson's which can affect behaviour, moods and memory. He is much easier to live with since he's been on medication. So ask him to visit your doctor but go with him.

Thank you for all your responses.
In the very short term, I think i will just keep an eye on things, but if the opportunity arises to raise the issue and discuss it with him, I will do that, and see where that leads.