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The Queen's Speech on Thursday

(53 Posts)
Gaunt47 Mon 16-Dec-19 07:24:25

We have been told that the Queen's speech at the opening of parliament will be shorter than usual, so I would like to suggest the following text:
"Listen up, you horrible lot of time wasters. Just get on with it. I've had enough of the arguments and the procrastination. Alright? Right. Otherwise heads will roll. There's probably still something in the constitution which allows me to get rid of the lot of you if I want to. You've been warned."
Does anyone have any other ideas about what could be succinctly added so that the poor woman can get home promptly to take her crown off and have a nice cup of tea?

trisher Mon 16-Dec-19 11:14:50

Well she doesn't write it Boris (or his underlings) does. So perhaps she should start with a disclaimer. "Some of what you are about to hear is true, some of the things may be implemented, some things I haven't mentioned might happen as well. There are no guarantees in life and certainly none in this parliament. None of this is my responsibility"
Or she could paraphrase her ancestor Charles 11
"My words are those of my ministers as are my actions"

jannxxx Mon 16-Dec-19 11:15:27

i would say do your bloody jobs or ill fire you all

Margs Mon 16-Dec-19 11:30:14

ReadyMeals: what about Phillip doing the deed? The air would be blue with Home Truths......

RubyGran Mon 16-Dec-19 11:37:26

Put aside the personal ambition and start helping people badly affected by over a decade of cuts to rebuild their lives, giving them hope and self-respect again.

sodapop Mon 16-Dec-19 12:09:42

Oh yes, Philip allowed free rein would be wonderful Margs

ReadyMeals Mon 16-Dec-19 12:22:37

Lol, Philip, yeah :D

Brigidsdaughter Mon 16-Dec-19 12:25:12

Margslove it. Wed all want to see that!

CraftyGranny Mon 16-Dec-19 12:36:59

Most definitely Phillip tchgrin

endlessstrife Mon 16-Dec-19 12:43:15

Yes Nannan, my mistake, didn’t read it properly ?. I was talking about the Christmas Day speech.

endlessstrife Mon 16-Dec-19 12:45:02

and yes, I’ve been saying all along the Queen is our safety net if it all goes pear shaped. She definitely could get rid of them all.

granbabies123 Mon 16-Dec-19 12:46:28

Elegran
Well said.?

Annecan Mon 16-Dec-19 12:46:37

I want you all to realise that its time for a complete overhaul of the NHS
It’s not more money you’ll be getting, but better management
Pay by results and successful business leaders helping to sort out the total chaos.
My Gp has 9 front line staff and 6 practitioners. Crazy!

BusterTank Mon 16-Dec-19 12:55:13

She would say get this brexit malarkey done I'm not sure I have another 3 years left in me .

Lizoe Mon 16-Dec-19 13:07:10

We would like to see our dear son Andrew as Minister for Home or Foreign affairs. He will excel in any role that involves affairs.

Rufus2 Mon 16-Dec-19 13:07:19

Careful! There must be a Guideline somewhere outlawing treason! This thread is destined for the shredder pretty soon, a la "Usual Big Mouths etc." thread so make your prints or otherwise it will be anther case of "You don't know what You've got until it's gone!" hmm

Nanaval4G Mon 16-Dec-19 13:12:05

I wish she would say that Gaunt47 , I think the whole country are thoroughly fed up with the fiasco at the moment

Sawsage2 Mon 16-Dec-19 14:07:52

Love many, trust few and always paddle your own canoe!

Gaunt47 Mon 16-Dec-19 14:45:27

Some great ideas here!
Love the point about Queen of Scotland Tooting29, but with your permission I'd like to add another sentence:
"And while I am Queen of Scotland, if you ever so much as think about selling another swathe of your glorious countryside to that orange-faced git over the pond, you can forget about another referendum."

blueskies Mon 16-Dec-19 15:16:38

" All who voted for my wicked cruel government must go to the back of the queue for hospital/doctors appointments and shall have no social care. Serves you right. That's all folks. "

Callistemon Mon 16-Dec-19 15:42:54

Oh, missed endlesstrife's post, grannygranby
Apologies Marjgran

I was too busy laughing at some of the others

Nanny41 Mon 16-Dec-19 15:48:59

We would like to say to the honourable gentleman, stop this nonsense and get on with Brexit, you have promised to "get it done" well please do it.

Callistemon Mon 16-Dec-19 15:51:03

'My Prime Minister is ready to stuff Brexit'

'Or did he say oven-ready? I can't remember'.

Maremia Mon 16-Dec-19 15:58:26

Hi GNs, I expect a full and detailed description of how all of those amazing promises, made to us before the election, will be made real, by becoming government policy in this new parliament. There can be no excuses for not getting things done, as there is a clear majority to push through all the lovely things in the manifesto. I shall look especially at the details about social care.
If we don't cross internet paths again before the 25th then have a Happy Christmas or a Sweet Solstice or a Good Jul.

Callistemon Mon 16-Dec-19 16:04:07

Is that HM talking to us or you Maremia?

I know HM belongs to the WI, is she on GN do you think?

Gaunt47 Mon 16-Dec-19 16:08:12

Callistemon if HM isn't, she should be! We should perhaps look more closely at the estrangement threads.