Making me ill

Why not take a week off (self certified) and see how you feel during that week?

If you still feel unable to return to work after that, then go to your doctor and ask for some more time off.

You dont have to put ALL your jobs and qualifications on your applications, relevant highlights is fine

I'd do as MissAdventure has said. In the past, I've known a couple of women who were on long-term sick until they retired.

I wonder if I could get away with 10 years LTS ?

How many more years are you hoping to work? If you take time off as MissAdventure has suggested (you need it!) and when you feel more positive look at your CV again. Jobs you did in the 70's are unlikely to be relevant to anything you do now so just list jobs over last 20 years approx. and summarize earlier ones without dates.

Thank you to all of your for your kind advice, I really really appreciate it. I was hoping to work until I get my state pension, but, like thousands of women born in the 1950s, I won't get it until I'm 66. A colleague has contacted me tonight to say that the powers that be are coming in on Thursday to discuss staffing. I'll wait and see if they offer any solutions. If not, then I'll have no option but follow your advice and take some time out to recharge my batteries. However, I know I will feel incredibly guilty at leaving such a skeleton staff in the team to cope whilst I'm away. Also, nobody covers my personal workload if I'm away, it just sits there until I return. It's all so impossible, but, you're right, I need to put my mental health first. Thanks again gransnetters. Thank God for this site.

Evie
I've posted plenty of times on here about work related stress and angst; worried about letting people down, how to word things, feeling guilty about giving in my notice.

I've made myself feel ill with worrying about how everyone will be let down and so on.

Guess what though? I'm still alive, nobody hates me, and the jobs either got someone else to step into my shoes or they didn't.

Really, think about yourself first.

If you ve only got a year to go stick it out with a week off to recover no point in letting it all go for such a short time to work
Hopefully things might get sorted at this meeting fingers crossed

Oh my goodness, I'm not surprised you're stressed, especially if it's not even pleasant at home and you feel under pressure to earn money for a more comfortable future.

You know in all my long working life I never once heard a retirement speech in which a boss said, "I'd like to thank ….. for all those times when they came to work feeling stressed and ill."

The others are right, you need some time away from the job to recover your equilibrium, and if you can't manage that in the time you can self-certify, please go to the GP and tell them what you've told us. (In my practice you'd be lucky to get an appointment in less than a month.) I'm not a medic, but know that the crying is a sure sign of stress overload.

If you are a member of a professional association you might have a word with them, as they often run courses on wellbeing and workplace stress.

What leapt out at me were the reasons you went out to work after your retirement

Husband refuses to try and find any work

so that we have something left of our savings for our old age or to leave to our girls

husband isn't the nicest person to spend time with

Well first I would forget worrying about leaving something for your children and grandchildren - you can't make yourself ill by working in a stressful job to provide for younger family members when you're gone.

Your husband sounds like hard work - I feel very sorry for you.

I hope something comes from the forthcoming meeting and in the meantime I would certainly be off to the doctors before you crack.

The trouble is when you take time off a seriously depleted work force the whole thing collapses, leaving those there at breaking point too. It appears you only have one year before
you get your state pension and can leave having let no one down. Do you get the school holidays off? I would have to keep going for one year. If you don't get school holidays off, this long one through the summer, take all your holiday entitlement and just a week off.

Sorry no advice - except don't put leaving money for your family into the equation - but I hope it all gets sorted out for you, and soon.
Best wishes Danni x

I feel sad that you have to work to get away from your husband. Is there any hope that this situation may improve?

Conditions and expectations in the workplace are absolutely awful.

It looks as though your email might have had an affect so yes see what is said on Thursday and if you are given a chance to speak have something ready. You do need some time to think about things so a week off might help. With one year or so to go I would try and hang in there if you possibly can. Things don't sound very good with your OH but one thing at a time.

Evie64, on the face of it your admin staffing level is way too low for the size of the school, especially considering all the upheaval that always follows conversion.

Your focus has to be your own health, so don’t for goodness’ sake feel guilty if you get to the stage of needing time away from work. You aren’t in any way responsible for this situation and I’ve seen people absolutely broken by struggling on too long because they didn’t want to let others (in a school specifically the children) down.

As a WASPI I really do understand how scary it is to see the savings you thought you’d have for your retirement dwindling away, but it may be that you simply have to fall back on them if you do have to leave and can’t find another job. Your health must come first. I’m so sorry though that you don’t feel you would be happy at home with your DH. Perhaps if you do have to bite the bullet and retire early, you can find volunteering or other activities to occupy your time?

I hope you’ll let us know how the meeting goes tomorrow.

Oh dear - this is a sorry, and sadly not uncommon- situation. Work stress is awful - I was a SW and had to give up eventually as I was being driven into the ground.

I am afraid that "academy trusts" - what a nonsense they are - are notoriously inhuman in their dealings with staff; as and you rightly say, are concerned with only two things: saving money and getting through OfSteds.

I wholeheartedly agree that taking some time off is essential, because, whatever the academy trust might think - you do matter.

But I can see that taking time off to be with an OH who is poor company might be a mixed blessing; as might retirement when the time comes. Is there a way of tackling this problem? Counselling? - if he will consider it maybe? When this goal of retiring comes around you have this problem to face, and it might be worth getting stuck into that now so that retirement really will become something to look forward to.

I am so sorry that life feels so grim for you at the moment.

Do you have a local hospital where you could apply for a part time admin post if you had to leave this job? I have known people getting such work locally about your age. It is true that you may feel guilty about leaving but life will still go on where you currently work regardless and you can stay in touch with colleagues. Let's hope after Thursday it doesn't come to that.
I also hope you are putting the money you earn in your own bank account so that as the only earner you are in control.
I can remember my last year at work. I hated every minute but I was surprised how fast the time went and I kept thinking of the day I would leave and never return and it kept me going, also my colleagues were very envious.

As an old Union rep this is what I would advise.
You are suffering from work related stress, no doubt about that.
You need to see your GP and get signed off work for some time.
Contact your HR dept and tell them.
Also DONT LEAVE.

If they don't like you being away sick then they will have to send you for a medical assessment with Occupational Health. These people will either say not fit for work or inform your work place of the problem and changes for them to make.

If you kicked out due to ill health you might well get an enhanced pension that you can take straight away and that should help with finances.

Good luck but I would say don't let the ba....ds win.

Please let us know how it goes. Also I have been through this myself.

Trouble is, if your job is your sanctuary from home will you be worse off!!! At least at work you have something that occupies your mind, at home with no or very little support would you just dwell on everything and feel no better.

I suspect not, but are you a member of a union.? If so, they may be able to help? Yes, do seek help from your GP, and maybe you should consider Relate ( if that is still the correct name for the relationship helpline). It's not just work that is affecting you.

And I must defend academy trusts, Luckygirl. There are bound to be some bad apples, but to damn all of them is somewhat sweeping and incorrect.

I agree with barmeyoldbat!
Do not resign.go off sick with work related stress,and jump through the hoops they put in front of you.They will be horrible to you to get you to resign but don't do that.
You may be able to take early retirement due to ill health with an enhanced pension.short term pain for long term gain.

...and as a current union rep, could I advise all those in work to consider joining a union? It’s just this kind of issue that a union can help with. Unions can’t take on a problem that has already arisen, but issues arise in even the least troublesome jobs, and the small amount of outlay each month can provide peace of mind and support when and if members need help.

What jumped out at me was the reason you got a job in the first place...to get away from a husband who is not nice to spend time with. You make no mention of whether this has improved. If it hasn't maybe it needs sorting otherwise your retirement will be miserable.