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I'm disappointed

(60 Posts)
yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 13:33:03

I had been planning a visit to see my DS in Canada at the beginning of October. I was going to spend the weekend with him and his family (both parents work & kids at school so weekend is the best time). All flights booked several weeks ago and now I get a WhatsApp from him saying that, on checking the diary, they realise that they have a Halloween weekend campsite booked for that weekend, trick & treating, pumpkin carving etc. Plus they have booked a pitch for their trailer near some friends that are also going. "How you you feel about that" he asks.
I'm really disappointed as I was hoping to spend time with them and halloween is really not my thing, neither is spending the weekend in a caravan.
My plan was that I would spend the weekend with DS then go on to see my brother on the Sunday evening and stay with them for three days then home again. My previous trips to Canada have always been for less than a week as that works best for me. Three days with my DS and three days with my brother.
My question is what would you do?

Septimia Tue 20-Aug-19 15:02:21

Can you change your booking? If so, how about spending 3 days with your brother first, then the next weekend with your DS?

The hallowe'en camping wouldn't suit me either - for the hallowe'en events rather than the caravan.

crazyH Tue 20-Aug-19 15:07:27

Wouldn't suit me - why are you going for just a week? Gosh I couldn't do that. It would take me a day each to get over the flights itself and then , camping. No Thankyou. I wouldn't go, unless you are a seasoned and strong traveller . Hope it's all sorted for you .

Scribbles Tue 20-Aug-19 15:16:31

Your trip is at the beginning of October? But Halloween is at the end of October! Was this a typo or is there something odd going on here?

yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 15:37:56

septima that won't work as I'm flying out on Thursday (weekend with DS) then fly home the following Wednesday

yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 15:40:11

crazyH I always do a very short trip (it's not a holiday or sightseeing visit) it's just to catch up with the family there. I've done that for the last ten years, luckily I never have jet lag

Day6 Tue 20-Aug-19 15:40:25

I'd be disappointed to find the family were going camping when you arrived. Was there any discussion about the best time for you to stay with them?

Surely they knew you were coming that weekend and would have discussed a change of plan with you before making their camping arrangements Sounds very strange - like a lack of communication.

You are fitting a lot in to a very short break in Canada. I wouldn't like a Halloween weekend either. I don't celebrate Halloween and I wouldn't fancy camping either. Could you change your dates so that you see them the weekend before or afterwards? I imagine that would be tricky though if flights etc have been paid for. They sound a tad thoughtless. I'd be hurt that I'd not been consulted.

Hope you can work something out. flowers

yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 15:41:51

scribbles that's not a typo, it's the American / Canadian way of "celebrating" Halloween. It goes on for weeks and is everywhere. Grumpy old misery me hates Halloween!

yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 15:43:49

day6 my flights were booked in June after what I thought was discussions about the best days!
It's actually cheaper cancelling the flights than altering them

Jane10 Tue 20-Aug-19 15:57:36

Halloween hasn't changed dates! It was predictable that a family with young children would be occupied that weekend.
Are you flying from UK?

yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 16:02:13

jane10 if you'd read my original post you'd see that my visit was early October. In fact I fly out on the 3rd of October

GoodMama Tue 20-Aug-19 16:06:33

I can see how you might be disappointed that your visit isn’t going to go like you expected.

However, try and focus on the positives. You son and his family want to spend time with you, have invited you to join what is obviously a fun family weekend and you still get to see them and your brother.


Scribbles Tue 20-Aug-19 17:48:35

A month of Halloween? The mind boggles!
Is there somewhere you could stay close to but not at the camp site so you can have basic hotel comforts and food? Then you could spend some time each day with family without getting totally immersed in the Halloween nonsense. Not ideal, I know but it might help to salvage something from your trip.

Summerlove Tue 20-Aug-19 17:52:47

Can you stay with your son when they get home from the weekend instead?

Lessismore Tue 20-Aug-19 17:53:55

to "celebrate" what exactly? Devil worship?

I just don't get it.

yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 18:44:59

summerlove that would be perfect but both parents are working full time & kids will be back at school so I wouldn't see much of them anyway

yogagran Tue 20-Aug-19 18:45:59

I like scribbles idea best of all

Sara65 Tue 20-Aug-19 19:03:05

Wow! A month of Halloween!

I quite like it, but that’s mainly because it’s all over and done with in a day.

I think Scribbles plan sounds good, everyone should be happy with that.

PamelaJ1 Tue 20-Aug-19 19:10:43

Scribbles plan is good but have you seen where some of these campsites are in the US and Canada?
Miles and miles away from anything that resembles human habitation! Well lots of them anyway.

Summerlove Tue 20-Aug-19 19:11:26

I hope you can find a nice hotel nearby.

Doodle Tue 20-Aug-19 20:42:50

I can understand if mum and dad both work and the kids are at school that the Halloween trip with friends would be something all of them are looking forward to. It would be a shame to spoil their plans even if it is their mistake. Could you not grin and bear it just this once. It might be fun to see your grandchildren all excited. It’s only a couple of nights could you not cope and then catch up on some sleep when you get to your brothers? They obviously want you to be with them so why not give it a go

mosaicwarts Tue 20-Aug-19 21:04:45

I think it's great you'll be with all the kids at such a special time, pack your outfit and go and enjoy, it's so nice they want you with them smile

Do you go via CDG? My daughter was at McMaster for a year, in Hamilton, and I decided to go over and surprise her. My husband had just died and I was still in a 'fog' and nervous of going to Toronto alone, but really enjoyed the stopover at CDG, such a peaceful airport. I only went for five days - I don't think I felt normal for about two weeks upon return! Cracked a tooth at the airport too, those skinny chips are rock hard sometimes!

Enjoy your trip whatever you decide smile

Grannyknot Tue 20-Aug-19 21:40:27

I'd be disappointed too, but I would 'adjust my expectations' and make my mind up to be happy (I really do think that sometimes that is a choice) - and therefore I would go with the flow.

flowers ... at least they're not suggesting that you cancel.

CanadianGran Tue 20-Aug-19 22:02:19

Although I'm Canadian, I've never heard of Halloween camping event. At the beginning of the month, no less!

However, camping is a big part of many Canadian families, and some of the parks put on special events to entertain the campers. The weather will be cool at night, better to enjoy the evening huddled around the fire with a hot toddy! The leaves will be bearing their brilliant fall colours at that time of year. This may be an opportunity to experience something entirely new for you.
If your son has room for you to sleep, do consider it. You will enjoy the kids while they are having fun, and meet new people.
Also consider a nearby hotel and join the festivities for the daytime if there is no room for you in the family camper. Or you might be the coolest Granny ever if you rented an camper-van for the weekend and showed up to join them!

GoodMama Tue 20-Aug-19 22:19:44

I have to admit I love the fall season. The air turns crisp, i get to wear my scarves and sweaters. Leaves turn and crunch under my feet when I walk. Root vegetables are in season to make yummy soups and comfort foods. Everyone puts put pumpkins and gourds for decoration. It kicks off the holiday season, big changes and excitement in the air. Halloween is a (small) fun part of it. Kids get dressed up, walk with their parents around the neighborhood trick-or-treating, meeting and greeting neighbors and friends.

It's my favorite season.

Yogagran, it's wonderful they want to include you on such a special family time. Perhaps take other posters advice and "grin through it". I'd advise against being grumpy or complaining. If you do find a hotel, be pleasant about it. Show you are excited to be included. Don't let on you are upset.

Keep it light and fun, you might surprise yourself and have a great time if you bring the right attitude.