Don’t want to go

Definitely go along, it's for someone you like and I always try to put myself in some elses shoes. I imagine that she would be glad to pop along to a party for you. Who knows, it might be great!

either go but just say you can only pop in, and then leave, or do something like a lunch with just your friend, i like most people now distance myself from negative people, i dont need it in my life and im happier without them, as you would be with just a good lunch

I think you should go - your friend would be upset if you don't. You'll probably enjoy it once you're there (& yes, I do sound just like my mum when I was six and didn't want to go to something) If it's quite a big party you can avoid the ones you don't want to talk to. And if it's a small do then your presence will even more valued. Me, I'd go and listen to everything the snobby ones said but then with my job, it's all potential material.

I don’t do anything I don’t want to do and I don’t ever give a reason. It’s up to you of course but if you don’t want to go don’t.

I’d go with your friend who also isn’t keen on going and you two can huddle together for an hour or so giving each other ? looks. Then also organise your own thing as you suggested as well.

I don't know when you planned to go out for lunch. If it were to be on the same day as the party (his birthday), which I'm assuming would be in the evening, then why not still meet for lunch? Then when you pop in to the party you could say something along the lines of "I won't stop long as we celebrated at lunchtime. Just wanted to check you are having a good time!"

If it is the kind of party where you can just pop in for a while, then leave, then that is what I would do.

If just showing your face then leaving is likely to cause offence, you can be unable to attend. You don't have to give a reason, but if they can see that lights are on in your house, then you will just have to go out somewhere for the evening.

You will no doubt hurt your neighbour if refusing to go to the party Grin and bear as this refusal to go will only serve to put the ball in your friends daughters court and no doubt give her something no doubt derogatory to say about you to her father. The choice is yours .

If you know he would like you there why not do it for him. Tell yourself you are just as good as them.I imagine maybe you see him more than they do as you are also a neighbour as well as a friend dont you think he may be hurt if you do not make this effort.

If you don't want to go, then don't go. I don't particualrly like 'get togethers' as someone always misbehaves either through too much to drink, or they tend to show off.

I always make an excuse or just say it's not my 'thing'.

Go with your other friend, there's strength in numbers and you two can chat. You might even have a good time.

I refuse to consider that anyone is better than I am. They might have more money bigger houses etc. That is not what I think of as a better person, especially if they look down their noses at you. It just means they are ill mannered.
Go enjoy yourself as you normally would, if they don’t like it, tough it’s their loss

I think you should go for your friend. You might find that you enjoy yourself!! But also have the quiet meal with him later

He’s your friend of course you must go. It’s only for a few hours, what’s that in years of friendship? If you don’t go you may regret it. Who knows you may even enjoy it.?

Take your friend out for lunch but tell the daughter you will go, then on the night you could have a migraine or something similar.

I think ALL invitations should be accepted! It’s because the hosts want you there.

Snobby or not - they’ve extended an invitation.

Go!

Your 70y old friend will be DELIGHTED to see you at his surprise party.

Just relax and be YOU - it’s who the birthday boy loves.

Difficult one, this. Easy to say go and enjoy yourself, your friend will like it and you can ignore his daughter but in real life, these dislikes can permeate around.

If you genuinely don’t want to go, can you pop a note through their letterbox the day before saying you are feeling rather flu-y and don’t want to spoil the party or make anyone else ill, but you’ll take your neighbour out for lunch when you feel better.

On the other hand, if you are feeling brave, as it’s for your friend who would like you there, you could go with your other neighbour and find a corner to sit in and enjoy the conversation, canapés, cake AND drink! ????

How upset would your friend be on his surprise 70th birthday party if you weren’t there? If you think it’d bother him then I’d smile, grit your teeth and go. If you think he wouldn’t be bothered there’s no need to put yourself through it.

I would attend and if things get a bit iffy, just develop a migraine. But still take your friend out for lunch.x

Friendship between neighbours is a really precious thing. Go. If your fears are realised have an exit rehearsed - Glances at watch - Oh gosh I have a very early start tomorrow. etc - do a bit of googling.

Hi Good Evening my thoughts are with you all I can say is never put yourself in a situation that you are not happy with, I have a phrase in these situations ? be economical with the truth you never have to explain yourself, take your friend out just you and her to mark the occasion.

Your friend could be looking for you to 'rescue' him from all the other guests

Go just for your friend. You never know you might even enjoy it. You don't have to stay to long,

What's the food going to be like?
any 'talent' there at all (?)
That used to be the way we weighed things up for a party, didn't it?
all best
painting

Perhaps your friend wants to demonstrate to his family that he does have friends of his own rather than them thinking that without them he is a 'Johny no mates'. If it saves his pride perhaps it would be worth going?