I reallly want to change my life but dont know were to start

I like Mishap's list idea and Gaga's contentment. Both good imo. I would also suggest find yourself something to be passionate about, sport, theatre, music or whatever. We are passionate about dance and it brings great joy to us. Yes, we like lost of other things but that is in addition to dance.

i wouldn't rule out moving to the 'country' but would suggest that if you think it might be an option you rent for 6 months to help with making the decision. We did it when we retired, a small town in the country and we absolutely love it. Having lived in so many different places it may have been easier for us to adjust than it would be for others and we just love the way everyone has time to be friendly which we didn't find in the London area. We don't think we will ever move again.

Good luck with your search.

To quote John Bunyan

I am content with what I have
Little be it or much

And Lord contentment still I crave
Because thou save st such

I would love to read that book hummingbird and will look out for it. I agree a very good quote.
jo8, you didn't upset me and I love to discuss things but, I would never get personal, I always generalise, well unless you attack my DC and then I would come for you ha ha. Shall we leave it there?

Hi I went on the Homestart website today and volunteered myself for a couple of projects, really happy about that. Hey I used the word happy, well thats all thanks to Proffessor Gran-netters. I was broken and you fixed me with your help advise and information I was just looking to change a few things and needed something meaningful

I haven't ruled out moving because I have moved quite a bit in my life and cliquey villagers don't scare me but I am aware that I would need to make lot's of effort to be accepted.

Thank you x

Galen! I nearly posted that quote! Great minds eh?

You won't find happiness by chasing it; but often it catches you unaware. You haven't chased it, Jadey, but you have allowed it into your life.

Jingle but fools seldom---------

Well done Jadey. What area do you live in?

That'll be it Galen.

Thanks Y london

Research into happiness seems to show that doing kind things for others makes us happier than anything else. So volunteering is a great suggestion. Homestart is a good way for grandmothers to share their kindness and experience. Many towns have a website where charities list their voluntary work vacancies.

I believe you can be "as happy as you make your mind up to be" - it's a conscious act of will, putting aside whatever it is that makes you unhappy - for an hour, a day or even a week. .

I agree with Flowerfriend . It took me a while after losing my Husband to make myself do anything constructive. Then I began to volunteer in a local charity, loosely connected with my previous job, and met others, of various ages, with a similar outlook and life then had some meaning again. I've now gained enough confidence to go to the cinema,and once even to the theatre ,on my own. It's amazing how often I end up talking to someone else on their own. I do still prefer the times spent with friends, and especially with my DD, SIL AND GCH, but,apart from going on holiday, am not afraid to 'go it alone' rather than do nothing with my retirement years.

Loved that book - it was genuinely uplifting and expressed something I have occasionally had the urge to do- just set off towards somewhere and keep going!

I'm feeling down so I'm rereading the Elliot's of Damrosehay series. I always find Elizabeth Goudge soothing. I'm still longing for my favourite, the herb of grace to come on kindle. The other two already are!

Galen, I remember reading those when I was a teenager. I loved Elizabeth Goudge. Some of her books were serialised in the Woman's Journal, which my mother had delivered monthly. I willed her to get through with it so that I could devour it. They also serialised Georgette Heyer's novels. You don't get magazines like that any more. Great knitting patterns too.

I met her when I was doing my house jobs in Westbromwich the herb of grace was in an old bookcase on the doctors residence, as I was bored on call one evening waiting for a case to come in I started reading it! I was hooked!

Oh, jingle, how terribly sad your post made me. Do you really think that most people are unhappy more often than they are happy? It certainly is not true for me. Throughout my life I have had some periods of boredom, or hard work, and lately some sadness, but I am sure if I were able to tot it all up I would find I had been happy for much longer than all the other feelings.

Well, perhaps I was having a bad moment! But I really think most people spend a great deal of time in the middle to lower sphere of the happiness/unhappiness scale. Interspersed with days or flashes of true happiness.

I would include boredom as unhappiness. I think. But I'm not often bored.

With you around , I wouldn't think any body else is either

Not a cheeky question JO, 42 years in January gone . [and it don"t seem a day too long] Why? and lots of them

Hi Jadey. Hope you are feeling better now, more alive, not as if you are just existing. Have a lovely Christmas and a happy new year.

I don't think Jadey is on the forum anymore...there doesnt seem to be a profile for her.