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Toddler who likes to say `NO`

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rosequartz Mon 28-Sept-15 23:39:45

I am not above a bit of bribery, or, as I like to call it, psychology,!

Ie not just let's go downstairs but 'time to go downstairs now, let's go and have a drink, piece of fruit/play a game' etc.

If all is safe upstairs you could say 'well, I'm going down anyway, shut the stairgate and go down (or pretend to if she is in a cot) With a bit of luck she will wonder what she's missing and want to come down.

When she was in nappies and struggled I gave her a toy to hold, and did a lot of loud singing (probably worse than shouting grin), Row your boat, if you're happy and you know it, Daisy, daisy etc etc.

No shouting and no smacking - she's not my child!
The only time I have shouted at her was when she was about to leap off the back of the sofa!

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overthehill Mon 28-Sept-15 23:10:27

I have a beautiful, most times cheery, sometimes not, little 2year old granddaughter.

She is definitely her own person. `No` features quite a lot in her vocabulary along with `I can do it`, yes, but not always of course.

There is lots of advice out there of course, on dealing with this. For instance, if they won't put their coat on, give them the choice of the pink one or the blue one and this will settle it. If they kick up a fuss about going to bed say there won't be a story etc.

When mine were young if the screaming set out went on too long they would get a smack, but I wouldn't do that to her, as although I did it then, I do feel it is wrong.

I do shout though and the other day she wanted to remove her nappy before going to bed for a nap and I wasn't having it. A wrestling match broke out between the two of us and I was going to win. She ended up crying a lot but then did calm down along with nappy intact. We kissed and made up.

Later she woke and again after me saying let's go downstairs it was a resounding NO, but I reminded her that Nanny could get very cross and to my amazement she complied and off downstairs we went.

I suppose what I am saying is, giving choices at times of conflict, I don't feel is beneficial and you have to get across who's in charge.

What do other do?

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