Adult Sons, any good experiences?

Mair...At the moment, "cared for" means things like changing lightbulbs we can't reach, popping round milk when I run out, and anything to do with computers!

I was said that mantra on my wedding day off my mother in law who now needs me more than ever in her 90's but I have three sons and it's only the youngest that really shows concern as the other two have partners and he is still single. It you work at relationships and I do have three entirely different relationships with my sons but I live in hope!!!

P.S. I ended up with three grand-daughters anyway, which is another blessing.

Like most of the previous posters, they're all different.
Our 2 sons, now in their 50s, live far away. I'm not sure how they got this wanderlust, maybe because they spent their early childhood in Singapore. They keep in touch, but forget birthdays etc, whereas the 2 girls haven't moved far from 'home'.Eldest girl has the most conact with us ( we live in France.)
I do worry though about us starting to need more help as we get older as we're so far from all of them. Just hoping we 'go' quickly!

ps forgot to add, eldest son is very generous and has helped us out financially occasionally. He's also helped his brother and one of the girls.

I have 3 lovely adult sons. The eldest has a partner with a beautiful son. I see them a lot and the partner I treat as a daughter. My lovely daughter in law contacts a lot has a beautiful little boy too and see all of them. One son has a lovely male partner. Love them all and see them a lot - am very lucky. ?

I had 3 sons before my daughter was borm, followed by a 4th sonl I used to get so anoyed when people said how sorry they were that no.3 was another son and felt like putting a notice on the pram saying " It's a boy and we're delighted. " They now have families of their own but are still caring and supportive, as are their wives.

If anyone could be forgiven for feeling a bit sorry for herself it is my daughter. Her eldest son is at uni and has just spent a year in Japan. He has a lovely Japanese girlfriiend and it is quite clear that they intend to get married and live in Japan. My DD and SIL went over to Tokyo to meet her and her family last year and she spent Christmas here. They think the world of her and are simply pleased that their son is so happy.

Biscuitlover, you are indeed blessed to have two lovely little boys and a good relationship with your own MiL. I predict that in due course, you will also be a supportive and understanding MiL yourself.

Do not worry about the future but enjoy your sons now and show them love and encouragement. Yes, much of your later relatlionship will depend on the partner they choose, but this should not dismay you now.

My only son is less demonstrably affectionate than his three sisters( or his wife), despite the fact that he was very affectionate as a child. People develop as their personality dictates. But he is no less loving, in his way, than his sisters.

Be happy, have fun and enjoy your sons. The rest takes care of itself!

I was reminded of this thread when I bought a birthday card for one of my very dear daughters-in-law it reads front cover: Happy Birthday to a lovely daughter-in-law, the woman who knows our son better than anyone.
Inside it reads: No you can't give him back!

MY two adult sons not married and both live at home but are both caring and considerate to both me and DH.

I have a DD and 2 DS, daughter calls most days,Boys call when they need me. Would i want 2 DD and 1 DS instead ? no thanks, boys are easier

My sons are great. They're now 31, 28 and 26 but they're always there if I need them.

A mixed bag, but on the whole good, there have been some experiences I could have happily foregone, but then that would apply to whatever the sex of one's offspring in certain instances. Quite a small upside, my sons never criticised my appearance on the contrary were always flattering, I have known mothers of girls who say that daughters have been quite harsh in that respect but I wouldn't want to generalise. I think I had my sons (late 20s and early 30s) at a time when here in the west the tide had turned against boys being the favoured sex and it seriously pissed me off at times when some people had the temerity to suggest that somehow having only sons must be a disappointment. Also, and my sons agree with me on this, education here in the UK is not always geared up for boys, possibly the way it precluded girls once and still does in some cultures. Both my sons bemoaned the serious lack of male teachers during their school years and both have said there was a bias towards the girls by some of the female teachers, who frankly made it plain that they didn't enjoy teaching boys. Of course, I would stress they had some excellent female teachers during their school years. However, I think boys benefit from male teachers during adolescence and teens, but unfortunately, as we know,there is a shortage of male teachers.

I don't worry too much about the mother in law aspect, I get on with both my sons current and hopefully long term partners, especially in the case of one of them as they've bought a hosue together. Cardinal rule should be don't interfere and keep opinions to yourself. Biscuitlover continue to enjoy your boys 2 and 4 are lovely ages and I'm sure they will turn out to be very loving sons.

My lovely 33 year old son is still at home - he's Aspergers, but we're really proud of him because he's loving, caring, hard-working 1 in a million. We want him to become more independent of us, and desperately want him to fly the nest - I feel so sorry for those sad "mother's boys" who are still at home in their 40s.

When my DH was taken gravely ill on La Palma (one of the smaller Canary Isles) (I was told he was dying) my two sons, 48 and 50, dropped everything to reach me, by train, car and 3 planes, and then hired a car to be with me in 24 hours. I was so relieved to see them, especially as very little English was spoken on La Palma. They visited the ICU with me and stayed till he was out of danger. Fortunately he eventually made a complete recovery but no daughters could have done more, leaving both jobs and families to help when I needed it most.

I Love my son. He has always been and I hope always will be my rock and one of my best friends. He has a super partner who I also love dearly, so instead of losing a son I've gained another daughter and a beautiful 4 year old granddaughter to boot.

I hope you have as much love and fun with your sons as I have had with mine, lucky you, double the joy x

Thanks for all your lovely replies, it's been really helpful for me to read them through. I think the thing is a small part of me would have liked to have a daughter as well as sons so perhaps that's why these negative comments make me feel so sad.

However I do feel very lucky to have my two sweet boys and will continue to enjoy them. for you all!