Gransnet forums

Ask a gran

Was I wrong ?

(116 Posts)
Mauriherb Mon 23-Oct-17 09:29:14

Yesterday, while in town, I needed the loo. I went into the public ones and there was no queue but all the cubicles were occupied except the disabled one, so I used that. When I came out a lady mumbled something about me not looking disabled so I pointed out that the door said "disabled" not "disabled only" which I assume means that anyone could use it. I certainly wouldn't have used it if a disabled person was behind me in the queue. My question is.... was I wrong to use the disabled loo ?

Luckygirl Mon 23-Oct-17 09:32:14

Of course not - it is total nonsense for a loo to be empty when others need it. Just tell her to piss off! grin

Marydoll Mon 23-Oct-17 09:43:13

I agree Luckygirl.
I have disabilities, but common sense says use what is available if there is no queue. I certainly wouldn't object.
Also, looking at me, you would never realise I am disabled, I look really well.
Some people are just nasty.

Lona Mon 23-Oct-17 09:50:52

Of course you weren't wrong. I often use the disabled toilet in Waitrose, especially if I'm with my little gd. I've never seen anyone disabled using it or waiting to use it.

Charleygirl Mon 23-Oct-17 09:52:39

I popped into a male loo once, thankfully there was nobody there. I just misread the sign on the door.

There is no reason why you cannot use a disabled loo. Some people are plain nasty.

MissAdventure Mon 23-Oct-17 09:53:23

I would say the 'disabled' sign just means the toilet is more accessible for disabled people, not that nobody else is allowed, so I use it with impunity. U

luluaugust Mon 23-Oct-17 10:13:43

Don't worry, any port in a storm!

quEEEniE Mon 23-Oct-17 10:15:22

what about when you go in to the toilets and there is a que but nobody has tested the closed doors! Truly despair of my own sex somethimes.

Mauriherb Mon 23-Oct-17 10:17:46

Thank you. I'd never really thought about it before but she made me feel guilty! I always use the disabled loo when I have dgs with me as it's the only one big enough to take the pushchair in

Nanny123 Mon 23-Oct-17 10:18:48

Not at all - if it were empty why not.

My mum uses to suffer badly with Crohn's disease and needed to use toilets in a frequent basis - she didn’t “look”
Disabled but she was. That could have been you - that woman had no right in having a go at you

goodgran Mon 23-Oct-17 10:22:18

I have a blue badge but never use the disabled loos cos I haven't got a wheelchair. But in hindsight it's crazy! No, you did nothing wrong at all and I'll be doing the same in future!wink

glammanana Mon 23-Oct-17 10:23:10

Its just what you class as disabled,I don't look disabled but could claim that my weak bladder entitled me to use it and I would use it if it was all that was available.Some people can't help in sticking their noses in other peoples business can they.?

Grandson2008 Mon 23-Oct-17 10:23:10

Of course you've done nothing wrong I use disabled toilets if the others are full. Also as in my case not all disabilities are seen

Esspee Mon 23-Oct-17 10:31:55

I would only consider it an issue if a disabled person was being prevented access because a non disabled person was using the facility.

Coco51 Mon 23-Oct-17 10:32:28

Would you also park in a bay designated for blue badge holders? If not, there is your answer. Why use the facilities that might be more urgently needed by a disabled person? You could not possibly know when you were in there whether there was someone outside with a greater need than your own.

Altissimma Mon 23-Oct-17 10:34:58

You can purchase a RADAR key which opens accessible toilets under the RADAR s cheme which has been a lifesaver for a husband who's always needing the toilet. It can be extremely frustrating when an able-bodied looking person comes strolling out of an accessible loo when my rollator-using husband has been standing "holding it in" for 5 minutes! Yes not all disabilities are visible. Thankfully, male toilets don't end up with queues the way female ones sometimes do!

Jaycee5 Mon 23-Oct-17 10:35:38

I was at a tourist spot once where there was a long queue going out of the door and a way outside. They only had two loos one of which had a disabled sign on it and the queue was for the other one. It was ridiculous. Politeness and consideration is important but sometimes it just gets silly and people can't use common sense and discretion. No one wanted to be the one to break the 'rule' that everyone had imagined existed (including me). I considered it but I wasn't in the mood for the argument that I knew would follow.

grannygranby Mon 23-Oct-17 10:42:00

Yes common sense must rule. It is not like the 'disabled only' parking bays which are legally restricted. The loos are 'disabled friendly' to allow wheelchair access by the law which is great....and are not 'disabled only'.

michellehargreaves Mon 23-Oct-17 10:42:02

Of course you weren't wrong. A disabled parking space is an entirely different thing. When people park they are usually gone for ages. A quick pee in a disabled loo is unlikely to lead to a long queue of wheelchairs outside the loo door!

RetiredRGN Mon 23-Oct-17 10:42:13

I like the way places like Asda are changing their signage to Accessible Toilet Not All Disabilities are Visible I have a dicky hip which I prefer using a higher toilet seat for I also have a radar key for a bladder condition too even though I'm not eligible for a blue badge

Jaycee5 Mon 23-Oct-17 10:43:13

Coco51 It is illegal to park in a disabled bay and that is quite different.
If there are a lot of toilets then I would wait even if there was a queue but there is a difference between toilets designated for disabled people and those which are accessible for disabled people.
I share glammanana's problem and would either have an accident or be in pain if I had to wait too long (in fact I have to consider the loo situation when I go anywhere nowadays).
I would definitely not spend 5 minutes in a disabled loo and that is inconsiderate but does that really happen often and I can't actually remember the last time I used one but it seems that people are less and less able nowadays to use discretion and common sense.

ruthjean Mon 23-Oct-17 10:46:40

course not! mind you when I used one in Australia once (I'm not disabled) a police officer glanced at I started limping, much to my sister's amusement !

kwest Mon 23-Oct-17 10:49:24

You were absolutely right to use the empty disabled loo.
You used practical common sense. Don't worry or even give it another thought.

Ellie Anne Mon 23-Oct-17 10:53:39

I don’t see a problem. You weren’t preventing someone else from using it and I don’t expect you were in there long. I also have used it when I had children with me. The doors are wider so you can get buggy in.

Smithy Mon 23-Oct-17 10:53:54

Exactly right kwest! Anyway when I've got to go, I've GOT to go so I'd even go in the gents (only in a nice place and if there was no smell!) if I was desperate.