Anyone having major anger outbursts with 75 year old DH?

Good idea.

Bad day. Got shouted at for not looking after his jacket in garden centre. On to my 4th G&T

Help?!

Is there a pub near you with a garden? If so, go there and take a book or something else to amuse yourself. If you carry on drinking home measures you will have another row, and feel bad in the morning and start blaming yourself. THIS IS NOT YOU, It's HIM!

Don’t speak to him tomorrow! Monosybles only! He can look after his own bloody jacket next time! Maybe even cook his own dinner.

Are you keeping a diary? It helps. You can then see that you’re the sane one.

And Ilovecheese is right. Dilute the gin!

Gin diluted !

Doesn’t want to speak to me ever again! All over a stupid jacket. Well I can do that. Monosyllabic from now on Nfk Dumpling

. And serene. Stay serene! Can you go to stay with your daughter for a while? Just vanish and leave him be to ponder for a bit?

Kate13 it is good advice to get away if you possibly can. This sounds an appalling existence for you and he needs to learn (old dog, new tricks) that his bullying behaviour is entirely unacceptable. Yes counselling may help you, but he is the problem.
Please, please a) look after your own interests, b) look after your own safety and c) get help.

Echo that.

No it is Not your fault Katie13 definitely not .. sounds like you have an in patient un kind husband sorry to say but this is what it does sound like How about you give him a bit of his own medicine and tell him that in fact hee is getting on your nerves and is in Your way!

You are doing all the right things Katie13, getting out and seeing other people, but it must be such hard work.

Yes I can go to DD but have decided to stay put

I’ve worked hard for half this bungalow, contents and garden. I’m not going to give him any ammunition.

I shall just go out as he comes in, see how he
likes shouting at the wall

I wasn’t thinking of permanently. Just a break. If it’s too dodgy to leave though, you’re right, you must stay put. Perhaps a visit to a solicitor may be an idea? Just to know where you stand and help you feel secure.

Yes that’s an idea.

Perhaps get my will changed too

At the moment he’s out so am enjoying the haven of peace and quiet

It won’t last.....

Who does the housework, cooking etc?

I do and he does the garden and the car and outside jobs

Well I do some gardening (if I’m allowed to!) but he generally pulls his weight one way or another

Seeing a solicitor and councillor will help you know where you stand and what you want and make you stronger. As you say, you’ve worked for what you have, but only you can decide your feelings and priorities.

It’s good that he does the outside stuff. Summer is here so hopefully he’ll be out from under your feet a bit more. What would happen if you tell him to get out of your kitchen?