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Where does the time go!

(64 Posts)
Grammaretto Thu 18-Oct-18 12:13:41

Since retiring, in my case 10 years ago, we have never been so busy. It's a cliche but true, there is so much to do. I find it hard to find the time to be the kind of gran I'd like to be for our 7 DGC and to do even half the things I want to do in my later years. How do you all manage?

travelsafar Thu 18-Oct-18 13:05:42

The answer for me is 'i don't' smile Things slowly start to slide and the importance of things that you really enjoy take precidence. I know how you feel and i too wonder where the hours go. I truely believe it happens when your life is happy and fulfilled and you feel content.

GrannyGravy13 Thu 18-Oct-18 13:07:23

Grammaretto, I have no idea where the time goes!!!

I lurch from one school holiday to the next (we have 3 of our GC as parents work). I seem to have a to do list that grows by the day!!! I had visions of long walks along the seafront or wandering into the countryside for leisurely lunches with Husband. Well I shall just carry on dreaming!

PECS Thu 18-Oct-18 13:53:24

Ha! I know October half term already! Time to make the Christmas cakes! I will have 4DGC x 2 days next week so hope the weather is good.. always makes finding things to do easier!
It is hard to fit all the plans in many places to see, things to do, people to meet. I feel like the white rabbit sometimes dashing about trying to beat the clock!

Greenfinch Thu 18-Oct-18 14:02:54

And Gransnet to catch up with !grin

Grammaretto Thu 18-Oct-18 14:54:41

I am glad I'm not the only one chasing my tail.
Admittedly I am writing this but I am waiting for DH to finish his hospital appointment. Its a lovely day so I am enjoying the autumn sunshine in the grounds. No DGC this week. They are away on holiday.
Other people seem to always be having breaks, holidays or cruises.
You are correct about getting priorities right. Let the housework go travelsafar

gillybob Thu 18-Oct-18 15:10:09

Other people seem to always be having breaks, holidays or cruises

Yes "other people" always seem to be doing wonderful things don't they Grammaretto ?

I work full time (30 hours at work 6 from home) look after 3 of my 4 grandchildren 2-3 days/nights every week, the baby 1 night a week. I look after my dad and run errands/do washing/ironing etc. for the entire family. I take my "holiday" from work to fit in with the children's school holidays so I can have them full time. I have virtually zero "me" time and think I will be lucky to live to see any kind of retirement. Bitter? Just a teensy bit.

Grammaretto Thu 18-Oct-18 16:26:15

gillybob that's not fair. Sorry to bring up the subject.
I don't envy their holidays - I just don't know how they fit them in. May be I'm just slow
On the bright side, for you, the DGC will grow up and not need you anymore or at least not as much.
Well done anyway. I'm impressed.

gillybob Thu 18-Oct-18 17:17:52

Crikey, don’t be sorry at all Grammaretto smile To be honest its not about me having no time to myself , I just wish once in a blue moon I could feel appreciated instead of just being expected to do it all. My late mum had a silly saying “they only ever flog a willing horse” which I didn’t I never understood, but now think perhaps it makes sense . The more you do the more you are expected to do .

ginny Thu 18-Oct-18 18:02:25

Gillybob , I know there are lots of things going on in your life and you like to help. But why on earth are you also doing all the family laundry ? Tell them to do their own. With all you do whatever do they use their time for ? Maybe your Mum was right.

gillybob Thu 18-Oct-18 18:29:37

I don’t do all the family laundry ginny (sorry if I mislead you) I just do some of it to help out . DDiL works shifts and three very active children makes for a lot of laundry to wash, dry and iron . I also do all the family handwashing and stain removal cos apparently “I’m better at it than they are” hmm

PECS Thu 18-Oct-18 19:57:04

Hmm gilly I know the temptation to help out busy families but there are limits! When I am at my DDs' homes doing childcare I will do any obvious washing up, load/unload a dishwasher, hang out washing, wipe a surface etc. But would not clean properly or take responsibility for the laundry! I don't do that in my own home!! I worked f/t from when my DDs were at primary school (p/t before then) so know how busy it is for young f/t working families. But it is over busy for you! Care about yourself to gilly

sodapop Thu 18-Oct-18 20:14:25

I agree with PECS learn to say no sometimes Gillybob you deserve some time for yourself now.

NfkDumpling Thu 18-Oct-18 20:22:40

My DF reckoned that time went faster when he got older as he moved slower.

gillybob Thu 18-Oct-18 22:09:32

My grandma always used to say that time was relative to your age . When you are a child time moves slowly but speeds up as you get older . At 99 she said a day to her, was no more than the blink of an eye . smile

Willow500 Fri 19-Oct-18 07:45:48

My 'retirement' (redundancy) is looming at the end of the year and with no children to look after I'm wondering how I'll fill the time. However as the work has virtually all but dried up now I seem to have a lot of time on my hands which I'm struggling to fill. I think mostly due to the feeling I have to be near the pc in case I'm needed - hopefully once the ties are cut I'll be able to go out and do other things.

Gillybob I know your situation and can only echo everyone else - you need to try to find some time for yourself even if it's only an hour in the bath x

NanKate Fri 19-Oct-18 08:04:46

Willow within a few months you will wonder how you fitted in work.

Here are a few suggestions

Voluntary work
Meeting up with friends
Cinema in the daytime, how decadent 😀
Short holidays
Reading books

I could go on and on. Enjoy your retirement.

NannyJan53 Fri 19-Oct-18 08:43:39

I retired May of last year, and I really do not know where the time has gone,

As NanKate as mentioned, U3A, meeting friends for coffee/lunch, gardening, holidays (3 this year and a short break to Krakow), reading, gym, walking group. Oh yes, and cinema in the daytime (£3.00 and a cuppa and biscuit smile .

Then there is always the odd call of 'can you collect the girls from school today'?

I do not miss work at all !

Harris27 Fri 19-Oct-18 10:06:05

Yous all give me hope I have four grandchildren and don't see them as often as I want as I am still working and work school holidays s well. Got another 6 years before pension if I live that long ha ha!

Grandma59 Fri 19-Oct-18 10:20:33

I do not know where time goes and I honestly don’t know how I found time to go to work before I retired. No sooner is it Monday then it seems to jump to Sunday as the week is so full what with GC, seeing friends and family, lunches out.

Coconut Fri 19-Oct-18 10:25:55

My juggling skills are second to none 🤪 and my diary is full up .... I love it as it’s all stuff I choose to do instead of what I have to do 💃🏃🏻‍♀️🤸‍♂️🏸

kittylester Fri 19-Oct-18 10:43:48

DH and I were talking about this yesterday. He retired 2 years ago with great plans of walking the Leicestershire Round and The National Forest, doing another degree and volunteering. Well - he does do the volunteering bit. I think he should halve his volunteering commitments.

I never had a proper job, working a bit for Dh when necessary but have always volunteered. Nothingg much has changed for me except I have more childminding responsibilities!!

We have a big family and meet friends but we never manage to find the time to go to the cinema and have not had a proper holiday this year because we are so busy..

And I love it!!

Kim19 Fri 19-Oct-18 10:55:53

I absolutely love retirement but it takes huge courage (I find) to say to no to requests for help and voluntary stuff which I would sometimes prefer not to do. Getting better. Even managed to resign from a 7 year commitment last month. Wowwee! Finding 'free' time to do absolutely nothing can be difficult but both wonderful and reinvigorating when it happens. Think I have some looming next week. Bring it on!

Jane10 Fri 19-Oct-18 11:20:46

I was feeling racked with guilt yesterday as all I had to do beyond ordinary chores was read or watch TV. I've been retired now for almost 4 years and most days are meaningfully occupied one way or another but with the occasional slack lapses like yesterday. Lovely!

kittylester Fri 19-Oct-18 12:04:50

Aren't days like that great, Jane?