Ashamed of son.

Sending every good wish, and hoping that when you return to your home things are as you left them.

Perhaps a new baby on the horizon might make your son rethink things and take appropriate steps?

Seems like he has been a second chance with his family, hoping he realises how fortunate he has been to be given it!

I do knit.

Funnily enough n Saturday I packed away a knitting booklet for baby clothes.

"Well i wont be needing that will I" thinks me!

on Saturday.

Oh I agree Phoenix he is very fortunate.

But AlfieBass does HE realise that? And do you think this night be the kick up the arse bottom that might make him change the drink & drugs thing?

I really, really hope for all concerned, you, his wife/partner and children that it will be.

phoenix
On the face of it hes saying all the right things. He gets carried away with life changing ideas. Changing his ways.

I really think he believes it at the time.

We've seen and heard it before so I have my doubts.

My main concern is the GC and offering support for the new child.
Long term if that includes him or not remains to be seen.

When I refer to him changing his ways I mean he plans to change.

Thank you phoenix for the flowers.

Thank you Monica

I don't think he can plan to change on his own though. While he is talking about change, could you get him to accept some counselling?

NanaMacGeek
I'll talk with him.
I doubt he'll see the need for counselling.
He's full steam ahead that everything will be fine.

I will be trying to persuade him to get counselling though.

Hope things work out well. Take a deep breath and try and unwind and relax a little x

Nothing to add to the advice and support here, other than to acknowledge how right you are to express doubt he will see the need for counselling. Best of luck in your attempts to get him to re-consider.
Take care of yourself x

Hope everything works out AlfieBass, and you have happier times ahead Take care of yourselves x

Alfie, I hope you feel able to follow up on some of the support groups and so on which people have mentioned.

I'm so deeply sorry, Alfiebass. Please take some comfort in the idea that it isn't really your son who is doing these things, it's the drugs/addiction. I have no advice to give but sending hugs!

First - you're a great mum and this is NOT your fault. We all do our best for our children and some just take a wrong path. I personally know a judge's son who is in the same position as yours.
Sometimes we have to be strong and say enough is enough. Your son may need to hit rock bottom before he chooses to change. Let him sort his own problems out. I know you love him and want what's best for him but he is an adult and as such we all have to live with the consequences of our choices good or bad. You've done your best. Time to stop trying to push the boulder uphill.
It may get worse or it may get better. But it's not right for you to have your own life constantly ruined by worry. You are a good person and a great mum and you've come a long way on your son's journey.. Let him determine the rest of it himself. Its up to him now.