OP,
You have to be kidding me!
Do you want your mil to come for a full month, take over your (excuse me, HER) child, demand your dh takes vacation while she is there, she is not happy with the name, etc?
If that is what you want, be my guest.
She is taking over your life, your postpartum period (which is no joke. Recovering from birth is not easy), your dh's vacation to be with he AND you remain silent aka polite?
Boundaries will not work with her. Why do you keep chasing her? Making her feel included? You give her an inch she takes 100 miles.
Her entitlement has no bounds.
Start by saying no, before the visit
For example, you want her to come, but only for 2 weeks
"No, mil, you are welcome to stay for weeks"
Seriously, your dh and you are doormat. Stop letting your MIL tell you what to do and take control of your lives.