Hi everyone I'm a mum to a 6 month old girl. I've had lots of pressure to leave my little one, my family aren't bothered so it's comeing more from my partners side.
The pressure to go out and leave her when she was just weeks old was overwhelming, i had postnatal depression, was struggling to bond and was feeling really low. That pressure to give her bottles, give her formula instead of breastmilk, to change my parenting style to make her more available for babysitting. it made things a lot harder on me, I felt the mil was was focusing on what she wanted me to do rather than realising how hard I was trying.
After turning her down multiple times, i'm now getting asked by her family. Im always being told that it's great to get out and to be on your own.
What is with this pressure to leave your child? I know the mil wants to spend time with them, but she lives on the same road and sees her every weekend and multiple times through the week. The little one still cries at the fil but he doesnt make the effort to come to us, I make the effort to go them every weekend sometimes on both days, for hours and hours as they play with the little one.
Maybe ill be a nan one day and I might be asking to have the grandchild for a day like the mil is asking me 😂 I'm not in her shoes, I'm only seeing it as pressure. Do they want me to not be there and if so why? I'm asking here because I wanted answers from nans who have maybe been in my mil shoes. Is it harder to bond with the child if the mother is there? Is it easier for them to be silly when I'm not there? I dont want her to feel she is missing out on being a grandmother. She is only 48 and has watched her mum look after her and her sisters kids when they went to work. I have never needed a babysitter like that because I dont work.
This isnt me being rude, I'm curious and want to understand it from
her perspective and if theres a possibility she feels uncomfortable I want to figure out ways to help that.
Thank you for reading, I know I'm not a nan but I want nans thoughts 😁
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