As far as I can see, you are well out of it!
I have 2 children, now grown up and both were diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder and my son also with ADHD in their younger years. I had no family support whatsoever as my own mum passed away before they were diagnosed. She had been ill for many years before she died, so even babysitting wasn't an option.
My husband and I had to bring up 2 very difficult children with zero support and that took its toll on us and our relationship, both mentally and physically!
My daughter who is now 29, has always denied her condition, in spite of it causing problems for her all throughout her schooldays! On 12th January, she gave birth to her first child, a little girl! Whilst I am delighted, I have concerns that my little granddaughter will turn out to be autistic too! She has already been diagnosed with a congenital heart murmur, so you can understand why I am concerned. I don't have a very good relationship with my daughter. I suffer from very severe arthritis and osteoporosis and also depression. She is totally lacking in empathy and is often quite nasty to me!
That being the case, and given my experience of bringing her and her brother up, I will be carrying out my grandparenting duties from a distance! ? No way am I getting involved! Fortunately, she lives over 50 miles away from me so it's easy for me to keep my distance!
I do sometimes wish I had a better relationship with my daughter and that I could be involved more with my little granddaughter, but for my own sanity, it's better that I stay out of the way! Good luck with your situation - I hope your daughter will eventually see sense! xx