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Should men have their own “Gramps Net” ?

(349 Posts)

GNHQ have commented on this thread. Read here.

Sago Thu 25-Aug-22 08:42:50

I love to read Micks “Good Morning “ thread, Mick is a Gentleman in every sense of the word.

I rarely engage with men on GN, I took exception to a couple of men who were very crude and misogynistic.

I feel it is most unusual for a man to join a predominantly female space.
If for example my husband said he wanted to become part of the GN community I would be very against him joining. .

I realise there could be many men on here that we assume to be women but would you post more freely or discuss more intimate matters if this were a female forum only?

Do you think men should have their own site?

Calendargirl Fri 26-Aug-22 07:36:16

Sometimes words like “clique” or “flounce” are appropriate in the context of what’s been written though Lucca.

Personally, I don’t like to see the ‘f” word or similar, and I don’t think they are acceptable ever.

If others choose to use certain words, that is up to them though, and I wouldn’t say that they should stop using them.

FannyCornforth Fri 26-Aug-22 07:39:25

Lucca

Agreed but without all the conditions….you can’t say that on that thread ….don’t argue…etc etc!

Trouble is I can’t think of anything…..

I know!
I’ve had ‘posters block’ recently.
I also got a bit cheesed off with being called names!

Lucca Fri 26-Aug-22 07:40:35

Done one……

FannyCornforth Fri 26-Aug-22 07:46:05

Ooh! See you there… ➡️

MawtheMerrier Fri 26-Aug-22 08:07:39

Thackeray said something like, ‘life is a mirror - frown at it and it frowns back; smile and it smiles back

Love it FannyC , not one I had heard before and so true.
What an excellent Thought for the day !

Calendargirl Fri 26-Aug-22 08:33:53

How about starting a ‘Thought For The Day’ thread Maw?

Probably been done before though.

MawtheMerrier Fri 26-Aug-22 08:37:45

It’s a thought……?

MawtheMerrier Fri 26-Aug-22 08:41:03

Callistemon21

^Particularly if we have a thread where we write a screenplay for a movie^

We've had several threads of stories wot we wrote ?

Nobody has written one in Italian though, have they?
Perhaps the Duolinguists might enjoy the challenge?

perché non provare?

Chewbacca Fri 26-Aug-22 08:49:41

Ottima idea! Perché non aprirlo con un nuovo thread?

FannyCornforth Fri 26-Aug-22 08:53:33

Oh no! ?
No more languages please! I’m an ignorant heathen as far as languages are concerned.

MawtheMerrier Fri 26-Aug-22 09:04:27

Chewbacca

Ottima idea! Perché non aprirlo con un nuovo thread?

Go for it Chewbacca !

Elegran Fri 26-Aug-22 09:05:50

paddyann54

Some of you must know very odd men if all they talk about is football and cars innards .I've worked in an industry thats top heavy with men all my life and rarely came across men like that .
My OH can talk for Scotland would win awards for it.he'll chat about anything and everything and most of the men I know are the same .
They aren't aliens ,though some of the posts on GN would have you believe otherwise .
Of course men should be on here they have every right to their views just like us women .

The football and cars' innards devotees were an example of the breed of man who wouldn't be seen dead on a social network site called "Gransnet".

Of course men should be on here, but not all men.

Lucca Fri 26-Aug-22 09:07:13

Calendargirl

Sometimes words like “clique” or “flounce” are appropriate in the context of what’s been written though Lucca.

Personally, I don’t like to see the ‘f” word or similar, and I don’t think they are acceptable ever.

If others choose to use certain words, that is up to them though, and I wouldn’t say that they should stop using them.

Fair enough, just my personal view.

StarDreamer Fri 26-Aug-22 09:27:10

FannyCornforth

Oh no! ?
No more languages please! I’m an ignorant heathen as far as languages are concerned.

Would you be willing to try Esperanto?

Everything a language needs without the irregularities of natural languages.

It is a really beautiful language and the life story of the man who invented it is really inspiring.

Esperanto is intended to be an auxiliary language to help people communicate. It is not at all an attempt to replace natural languages.

I have found that knowing some Esperanto and its grammar has helped me with other languages as it has helped me understand more about the structure of languages, what is the central requirement and what is irregularity that is there for historical reasons.

There are some special characters in Esperanto, yet they are helpful as, for example, the letter g is a hard g as in the English word gate and the g circumflex is a soft g as in the English word gemstone. So each word has its own pronunciation guide built-in to it.

There is a Duolingo Esperanto course, free.

Bellanonna Fri 26-Aug-22 10:11:55

The thing is, SD, it wouldn’t be very useful for communicating with others as I don’t believe it’s widely used. What you say about the circumflex is interesting but we already have the same thing in English. Gate, hard G. Gemstone, soft G. We use an E or an I after the G to get that effect.
It’s interesting that you have studied Esperanto but it seems like something one would do out of interest rather than to help with communication.

Doodledog Fri 26-Aug-22 10:19:22

Lucca

Calendargirl

Sometimes words like “clique” or “flounce” are appropriate in the context of what’s been written though Lucca.

Personally, I don’t like to see the ‘f” word or similar, and I don’t think they are acceptable ever.

If others choose to use certain words, that is up to them though, and I wouldn’t say that they should stop using them.

Fair enough, just my personal view.

I think the words, ‘clique’ ‘flounce’ and ‘derail’ are quite specific words that describe some situations perfectly.

Cliques exist offline too, but it is more obvious online when a group of people make it impossible for others to join in by talking to one another instead of everyone, particularly about something that others are not privy to.

Flouncing is announcing you are going to leave (a thread or a forum) and blaming others to control the narrative. It’s quite specific to online (or ‘real life’ toddlers grin). Most adults just stop posting - either on a particular thread that is annoying them, or take a break from the board while they are annoyed. It is attention seeking to announce it, and even more so to claim to have been ’hounded’. Other members can read the threads and decide for themselves if others are behaving badly.

Derailing can only happen online I think. If the conversation is about politics and people suddenly start talking about kittens they would be considered bonkers in real life. Online it is extremely rude - particularly as boards are often read asynchronously so it is easy to come to posts hours after they were written, and if someone has taken it on themselves to stop a discussion in its tracks it can be too late to have a say.

As these are particular behaviours they need particular words to describe them, I think. The alternative is to be unable to describe them/pretend they are not happening, or to have to laboriously explain them every time, instead of just using the words.

Have a flounce on me ?

Glorianny Fri 26-Aug-22 10:28:43

Perhaps those who object to men posting should ask GNHQ for some sort of indication at the start of any thread that men are not welcome to post on it. Then they could be quite happy and free from contamination. I can't help thinking though that if men said similar things about women as have been said about men on this thread (They only talk about sewing, cooking and babies for example) there would be loud cries of misogyny. Funny how things shift isn't it.

Galaxy Fri 26-Aug-22 10:31:44

I love the word flounce. Theres a flouncers corner on MN. It always makes me smile.

Callistemon21 Fri 26-Aug-22 10:41:18

hollysteers

I think some Gransnetters need to lighten up, male or female, take some comments on threads with a pinch of salt and a shrug.
It’s just chat, we don’t know each other, will (probably) never meet each other so why can’t we be objective and just enjoy the various topics without getting emotional?
Gransnet is not going downhill as far as I’m concerned, I really enjoy it and try not to get my knickers in a twist if someone strongly disagrees with me?

Well said hollysteers

I felt at one point as if much of what I posted was being pounced on and sneered at but then decided I didn't know the poster in RL and didn't care two hoots. Now I just laugh when the poster does it.
Mostly it's enjoyable and you can learn something new every day on GN ?

Bellanonna Fri 26-Aug-22 10:46:02

Good point Glorianny, I think the full wrath of the GN sisterhood would descend on any such male poster,

Callistemon21 Fri 26-Aug-22 10:47:54

We could start a car thread

FannyCornforth Fri 26-Aug-22 10:52:25

Callistemon21

We could start a car thread

There was a car thread about a year ago, called,
‘Do you remember your first car?’

It was started by a male poster.
He was quite new and didn’t hang around for long.

I kept reading the title as
‘Do you remember your first cat?’
So I started a thread called just that…

nanaK54 Fri 26-Aug-22 10:53:07

hollysteers

I think some Gransnetters need to lighten up, male or female, take some comments on threads with a pinch of salt and a shrug.
It’s just chat, we don’t know each other, will (probably) never meet each other so why can’t we be objective and just enjoy the various topics without getting emotional?
Gransnet is not going downhill as far as I’m concerned, I really enjoy it and try not to get my knickers in a twist if someone strongly disagrees with me?

Absolutely!
Add a little tolerance and kindness too.

Galaxy Fri 26-Aug-22 10:55:22

My first car died in the middle of crossing a dual carriageway, I have never forgotten it strangelysmile.

Sago Fri 26-Aug-22 10:57:21

OPhere Thank you all for making this such an interesting thread, I have read all the responses.
I was disappointed not to have more input from our male members.

I agree we should be inclusive and am overall happy to welcome men.

In the past posts from a couple of men made me want to leave the site, however I stayed, changed my username and stopped corresponding with certain posters.

I have set my boundaries and just keep away from most spats.
I think because male members are so few and far between when one does behave badly causes more consternation!