What I would tell my 20 year old self if I could

I would say nothing. Because ones 20 year old self, would be highly unlikely to to listen because older people will have said all these things to us when we were that age, but we just took no notice.

That, despite all my fears and insecurities, it will all work out fine.

M0nica

I would say nothing. Because ones 20 year old self, would be highly unlikely to to listen because older people will have said all these things to us when we were that age, but we just took no notice.

No one said those things to me Monica or I wouldn't have been full of insecurities.

kittylester they probably did, you were just not listening. All of us are full of insecurities. All that would have happened, if you had listened, and taken notice is that you would have been full of different insecurities.

I like your list Allsorts a lot, but I'm not sure I would have listened!

I would add one thing particular to me. I was having a bad time at uni and wrote to Dad saying he didnt love me. (he never outwardly expressed love and I was feeling down). I got the most thoughtful letter back imaginable and an invitation to talk. But I wasn't ready - it was all too much after years of silence.

then he died a year later and we never did have that conversation. So I treasure the letter and say to my younger self, have more courage, trust.

don't get married

I don't think it matters that or if our 20 year old selves would not have paid attention for the purposes of this thread...

So I'd have said "You're beautiful". And "Walk tall".

Stop doubting yourself.
You are far more capable than you think.
Stop trying to please everyone.
Be brave , go for it!
Be more assertive.

Be braver

I'd have just said, carry on having the fabulous time time you're having

Live your best life.

I told myself not to have a husband, mortgage and children but I didn't listen!

I would say - Listen to your dad!
Stick with the civil service for the pension.
Marrying a shepherd and living in the middle of the countryside is NOT romantic ??
Dad was right about so many things ?

Be more confident.
Be more assertive
Try not to always please everyone
Have some time for yourself cos your worth it!

Have more confidence in yourself.

No one said those things to me either kitty.

Don't get married too young.

At 20 I was a nurse, engaged to be married I don’t think I would have changed any of that, after 40 yrs both went sour and my life changed but it’s not possible to see that far in front.
I had 4 children in my 20s carried on nursing through all that, family friendly employment helped a lot, there was little child care those days.

No one said those things to me either kitty.
I got very little advice about life at home or school.
My mum loved me but had seven children and was very young.

I would tell myself you're as good as everyone else.

I couldn’t change my 20 year old self because I love my life and family. But a 20 year old person today I’d advise relax and believe in yourself be happy don’t worry, be kind work hard have respect for yourself and others. Save a little spend a lot.

Do what you really want, not what others expect.
Go to Italy (for singing) or London.
Don’t listen to my fearful mother.
Really use your talents.
Tell the naysayers to jump in the lake?

Learn by your mistakes but don’t let them define you. Wise words from my father. I made a few and moved on from hard lessons.

Have confidence in yourself and your abilities.

dogsmother

I couldn’t change my 20 year old self because I love my life and family. But a 20 year old person today I’d advise relax and believe in yourself be happy don’t worry, be kind work hard have respect for yourself and others. Save a little spend a lot.

That was really what I was trying to say, dogsmother.

I had no confidence that it would be ok when, actually, it is much more than OK. D