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Feeling left out

(433 Posts)
MoaningTurtle Wed 02-Aug-23 10:48:49

One of my DILs seems to resent our existence!
Today they have had their 20 week scan and thankfully all looks fine, however the placenta is low so she will need a scan at 36 weeks but they said they aren’t worried at all.
My son has just hurriedly texted me to pretend he hadn’t told me as she only wants her own mum to know.
I understand it’s her pregnancy and totally up to her what she does but this is just typical of her, she sees her mum during the week but doesn’t ever come to us, doesn’t want my son to ever tell us anything.
Am I wrong to find this hurtful?

VioletSky Mon 07-Aug-23 14:00:26

Best to use close friends for support and stay neutral in families

If it were a mother talking badly about the other parent to her children, it would be parental alienation

It works the same way

Eloethan Mon 07-Aug-23 19:40:28

She is probably feeling more concerned than they are letting on. I can see that it is hurtful to you, but I expect her relationship with her Mum is much closer and she is afraid you might comment on the matter or want to discuss it when she doesn't feel able to without getting emotional.

MercuryQueen Mon 07-Aug-23 21:01:53

If I knew two friends were gossiping about me behind my back, I wouldn’t want anything to do with them, and absolutely wouldn’t want them to have upsetting news about me.

I don’t see family being an exception to that. Why should someone tolerate behaviour from family that they wouldn’t from others? Isn’t family supposed to treat you BETTER?

lyleLyle Tue 08-Aug-23 12:09:51

Exactly@ MercuryQueen

Hithere Tue 08-Aug-23 12:18:12

Triple that

VioletSky Tue 08-Aug-23 12:32:01

Quadrupled

Dickens Wed 09-Aug-23 17:36:35

VioletSky

Pregnancy is terrifying, uncomfortable and wonderful

Also full of hormones

As is having a new baby

I've never been so simultaneously exhausted and full of energy, joyously happy and miserable in my whole life

Always be a person who doesn't add stress to anyone going through that

They won't forget

Wise words VS