Too young for Alcohol?

MissAdventure

Would you all feel the same if it was a mum and dad on a council estate, giving a can of two of beer to their teens?

Praise them for being responsible and sensible?

I think that would be more likely to result in a referral to Children’s Services MissAdventure

I don't drink, apart from a shandy - last one was about 15 years ago, and I wasn't given drink at home.
All this anecdotal evidence is just that.

I'm sure if teens are at a party they won't say "not for me, thanks, I had some wine with my dinner last week".

We always have our DD a sip of our wine from a young age and when she was about this age allowed her to have a small glass of sparking low alcohol wine ( Lambrini) at special meals at home. We found that after her University years she very rarely drinks these days. I am from a European background so it didn't seem strange to us .
They may be buying low alcohol larger for him? Which is readily available these days.

When I was young my parents let us have a drink with Christmas meal. We also had a tot of sherry on Christmas eve, alledgedly to make us sleep, it didn't work. Alcohol was not a mystery to us and not one of the six of us grew up to have an alcohol problem. I was in my 40s the first time I was really drunk! Make it taboo and kids will do it in secret. Neither of my own children have had issues with alcohol either, for the same reason

Of course, it’s you. A very concerned, loving grandma. We are of a generation that have some rules of etiquette, manners and probably more concerned about appearances.

I would let it go. Parents are in charge. Maybe it’s best that he’s drinking with his folks and not sneaking around too much. As long as he’s with his folks, he has parental approval.

Think about waay back in the old days when young girls of 15-18 were having babies! So what is a beer? I’m sure young lads were hitting the ale with their dads then too.

In Australia it is illegal for a person under eighteen to buy or consume alcohol in a licensed venue and at home must have the parents consent.

I think he's far better off having a drink with family than being out with his mates and a few litres of Cider, or what ever they go for now. My grandfather used to give me a glass of orange with a spot of Gin in it when I was 5 or 6, and a Cherry Brandy at Christmas. I liked the taste but it didn't turn me into an alcoholic.

Do people's teens never have have drunken teen shenanigans if they have a drink with mum and dad?

I don't believe that, unless the teenagers I've known are particularly terrible.

As a child I was always given a small glass of wine with my meal on special occasions such as Christmas, weddings, etc. I did the same with my children. If they’re brought up with it there’s no novelty, so no reason to drink to excess.

The reason to drink to excess is in order to get drunk.
Well, it was when I was a teen.

It is illegal here,at that age, on any licensed premises, including cafes and restaurants. The parents would be fined. Plus the restaurant or cafe owners would get into trouble and may lose their liquor licence. You can provide alcohol for under 18 s in your own home provided it is the parents supplying it. Very clear and none of my children have supplied my grandchildren with it u derange. It can be quite damaging to developing brains.

Alcohol. My drug of choice

When I was 17 I knew I was a female ready to take on the world. On my 17th birthday I walked into the hardest pub I knew in the locality and bought myself a drink. It was all a bit of a letdown. There was only one other customer. I drank my bicardi and coke and checked out the premises, never to return. Box ticked.
I did though acquire a liking for alcohol. I liked it enough to realise that I may have an addictive gene. That was enough to warn me that maybe I shouldn’t try anything else. So I said a firm “No” to anything else I was offered.
Lots of wine has passed under the bridge since then. The health implications have finally caught up with me.
Should I quit or just carry on doing something that from time to time fires lots of unused neural pathways and gives me some of my best /or not so great ideas.
I was just wondering if this reaction to alcohol strikes a chord with anyone else.

Perhaps you should start a new thread FranA.
This thread from February last year is more about adults giving children alcohol, whereas you seem to have made that decision yourself.

rafichagran

They are perhaps teaching him to drink responsibly.

Agree.

My parents ran a pub for many years.
Right from a very young age I was allowed to drink a weak shandy, a sip of spirits or watered down wine, usually with a meal.
When I was older, in my teens, I could try full strength alcohol.
I don't know whether this relaxed attitude to drinking contributed to the fact that I rarely drink other than during meals out or social occasions, or whether it was because I lived in a pub and saw what prats people made of themselves when they drank to excess.

According to the UK government

"However, if you’re 16 or 17 and accompanied by an adult, you can drink (but not buy) beer, wine or cider with a meal."

www.gov.uk/alcohol-young-people-law

Our children were allowed to have a beer at home if they wanted when they were 15, when it was available it never became a big thing and none of them have become big drinkers.

From about 14 or so I was always allowed a glass of wine with Sunday lunch at home & I haven't turned into an alcoholic!! I like a drink but not to excess, nearly 16 and the odd lager sounds perfectly acceptable

My children were allowed M&S Buck’s Fizz on Xmas morning from about 10 years old. Once they got to 15/16 we bought them low alcohol lager to drink at home with us. My eldest AS doesn’t drink more than 2 beers at any time. AS2 doesn’t get drunk either as he hates any loss of control. My youngest AS didn’t drink at all until he was 19/20 following the breakup of his relationship with his gf, he couldn’t control his intake which caused a lot of heartache and worry for us and his siblings. So perhaps controlled drinking could have helped him understand his limits.

I don't know how such an old thread has ended up on the daily email thing

Parents ( and grandson) decision I think.
My late father born in 1921 spoke of taking warm beer in a flask to school! It seemed to be the normal at that time!

Here in Denmark it has always been held that it is far better for 15-16 year olds to be allowed to drink a beer or a glass of wine at home, or when they are out with their parents, as they need to learn to drink responsibly.

This is far more likely to be achieved if they are with their parents than with their contemporaries!

Unless the boy's parents ask for your opinion, obviously you should say nothing.

I still remember visiting friends just before Christmas one year with my toddler daughter. We were given sherry and when we had finshed, the empty glasses remained on the coffee table. DD picked one up and drained the tiny remaining drop then said "Yummy yummy". We found it amusing. She then did the same with another 'empty glass'. We asked 'what is it?' expecting a repeat of yummy yummy but her response was "Gone!" At the time I was unaware of it being illegal for a child under five to have any alcohol!

I don't think my children experienced alcohol apart from that until they were teenagers. and both drink sensibly as adults. DD was usually the driver when out with friends at age 18 onwards so didn't drink at all. She did occasionally overdo it while at university, but now is teetotal as she finds it sometimes gives her headaches and she usually has to drive everywhere anyway. DS drinks regularly at home with meals but I don't think he overindulges.

I also remember taking my DS out for a meal while he was a Uni student. He went to the bar to get us drinks and was refused service as he looked too young! I think he was 20 at the time, but isn't very tall. I had to go and get the drinks as he didn't have any ID on him!

Personally I see no harm in a 15 year old having a drink with family as it's far better than drinking with friends who may encourage getting drunk.

Poppyred

The OP is the parent!

Is he? Or was there a word missed out or typo??

I agree with those who have pointed out that we have a strange attitude to alcahol - it is a drug but we treat it as if it is not. Culture and history are at play here. If it suddenly appeared today we'd ban it! Young people need to make choices about alcahol and some younger ones I know do not drink it at all.