family preparing a big party

Thank goodness I am one who loves a good party whether it's a surprise or organised. Play some great music and let me rock around the clock. At 81 years of age I don't have many left.

BigBopper - presumably your loved ones know you are a party person and will act accordingly.
That is excellent- I hope you have the opportunity to celebrate in the way you are happiest.

In response to your remark -
I feel sorry for people who must endure something they find unpleasant because someone else would like it.

When I want to do something special for the people I love I check it's what they would enjoy and I don't give them MissAdventure's spiders and snakes for example!
I'm fortunate that my family is loving and caring - in spite of the fact that we annoy each other now and again!
I do know how lucky I am.

Bingbangboom is concerned that her family are doing something (a party) that she won't enjoy - she would rather do something else.
I think at least some of us understand that this isn't something that appeals to everyone.

I hope you find something that works for you as well as your family, Bingbangboom.
💐

Tell them. I hate any fuss, and my family know that. We always have a family gathering with food, for birthdays.

I would hate a big party arranged for me but my girls know that. I have a big birthday next year and DH and I plan a city break away and a meal with the family in a nice restaurant. I will also plan a meal with close friends.

Ditto...tell them that's not what you would enjoy..... appreciate the jesture but let them know

I'm glad you know about the plan for a party.
Nothing worse than being dragged out of bed, in need of a hair wash, putting on your gardening clothes as first at hand, then being driven to a venue, to your worst nightmare of lots of people in a small room, all dressed nicely, singing "happy birthday". Especially as you had given strict instructions to never spring a surprise as you don't like and can't cope with surprises. Even more especially that several of the guests had also said the same to the party arranger. Needless to say, he was very soon after the ex.
That said, as you know about it, can you help organise it so that you can enjoy the occasion. You never know, they might club together to give you a little holiday as a gift.

Sarahr
😱

It's so nice when your loved ones try to make the holiday special. Do you already know what they have planned? Will it be a classic house party or something unusual? In any case, I'm sure the emotions will be unforgettable!

I’m another who wouldn’t want a surprise party where I’m the centre of attention. We have our Ruby Wedding in May and my 70th in December and we intend being away for both…and yes, all family and friends are aware!