Who do you turn to?

I live alone and sometimes really need someone, anyone, just to talk to. For me it helps to come here and join in a thread.

Once when very depressed I called Samaritans, they're there 24hrs a day and they saved my life. That's about it really...

I've just moved to be closer to family so I have seen them far more which is nice as I used to go days without seeing anyone. But if I need practical help I have to pay someone.

My new neighbours on one side seem nice but apparently the chap on the other side is something of a recluse.

Fortunately I still have my DH and our family all live within 20 mins of us.
In fact as youngsters of 70 and 72 we are still the ones who look out for DHs mother ( 92) and one neighbour ( 86 ).

Our children both live in the same town as us but at the moment it is usually the other way round they call us for help.

My AC live close by and I also have MrA here now but I did spend many years alone. some years ago.
All the neighbours keep an eye on one another here too, which is good too.

We have children fairly close and good friends and neighbours close by so are fortunate. My port of call has always been my DH , but since his dementia diognosis I have to recognize that he is no longer quite as reliable and rational as he was - and I know it will get worse. That is hard!

Half of my family live abroad, DS lives a 45 minute drive from me but I have a sister who lives at the other end of my town. I have a neighbour who has door keys in case of emergency.

Neither of my DC live within a hundred miles so I have to be self sufficient though I am very grateful for helpful neighbours, two of whom sorted out my cow damaged rear fence yesterday. On the whole, though, I pay. At least living in a village there is usually someone fairly local to tackle most jobs.

We have no one to turn to, all notions of community seem to have disappeared in England. We have three daughters spread around the UK, all are incredibly busy with careers. The nearest lives 45 minutes away. We have a family WhatsApp but we only actually see any of our three half a dozen times a year.
I often feel lonely.

Me!

I moved here after 35 years in Kent, where I had few friends. My DS lived nearby but died not long ago, just before my DH.

DD lives not far which I why I moved here, but both she and her husband have demanding jobs and they have two just teens, one of whom is disabled.

DS lives in India ATM and only comes home for a month in July.

I am fortunate in being in excellent health and manage everything despite not having a car. My neighbours would help but they have worse health than me and have lots of family nearby.

So I am totally self-reliant. I hate to think what would happen if I needed help…

I had an accident about a month ago and hurt myself quite badly. I wondered what would happen if I ever needed help but my son came and stayed with me for almost a week and I had help and offers of help from friends and neighbours too.
My children all live a distance away apart from one son.
I hate needing help but was so grateful for the care I was given.

After a major operation in August, both my AC came and stayed to look after me for 2 weeks. They were able to "work from home", as both live more than 2 hours away. Then DS put in place a private care package.
Meanwhile I have also been visited frequently by kind neighbours.
I know I am lucky, but it's been tough recovering from this on my own, and the coast is not clear yet.
DH had me to look after him when he was ill, but in a way I'm glad he doesn't have to see me going through the tough and uncertain recovery.

My family don`t live nearby, the nearest is an hour away and she has patients to deal with so would not be able to down tools, another dd is 2 hours away in Wales and my ds is in Scotland, I live in s somerset. They would sort me out, if needed but it would not be instant

I look after myself, am hale and hearty and fit for my age, also very self-reliant, self-contained and knowledgeable about my own health.

The thought of `what if` does not concern me, if it did I would not eg go cycling along busy roads or up steep hills. Prevention is a better way for me, holding a hand rail on the stairs is one example as is taking a shower rather than a bath, being careful with sharp knives, watching out for trip hazards. Prevention of muscle weakness too, very important

Nope.
Nobody springs to mind, as they live too far, although willing, or live close but are not so willing.

Talk is cheap, I've found.

Get a dog. You would be surprised how many people speak to you when you are walking the pooch. They are also great company,. welcome you home if you have been out and you get a great reception first thing in the morning. It's another heartbeat in the house.

boheminan

I live alone and sometimes really need someone, anyone, just to talk to. For me it helps to come here and join in a thread.

Once when very depressed I called Samaritans, they're there 24hrs a day and they saved my life. That's about it really...

PM me if you ever need a rant/chat/shoulder to cry on

We are so blessed, great friends (not many, but very reliable), reasonable neighbours and 5 AC, 3 of whom still live at home, oh and 1 naughty cocker spaniel and 3 even naughtier mini sausage dogs.

Happy to receive PMs if anyone needs to chat

When yiou choose to live alone then you choose to be independent and self sufficient. I sometimes talk things over with my nephew. People dont get trust from me. They earn it.

I have to rely on myself really. One son in Australia, one down south where I couldn’t afford to buy when I moved from my former, rather remote residence. I wouldn’t bother them unless there was an extreme crisis.
I live on a new estate of young couples and families. The two middle-aged households I got friendly with have moved away, I wouldn’t like to bother the others with their busy lives and not being about in the day.
I keep my mobile about me and hope I’d be in a state to use it if necessary.

This question has been bothering me during most of this first year of my widowhood.

I have three good friends I can ask for help, should I need it, and probably the nearest four neighbours would also help - if I can bring myself to ask! Big if.

We have a Senior Citizens' association that provides free help with small repairs, offers a morning phone call daily to make sure you are all right. Look into if there is something similar where you are.

GrannySomerset

Neither of my DC live within a hundred miles so I have to be self sufficient though I am very grateful for helpful neighbours, two of whom sorted out my cow damaged rear fence yesterday. On the whole, though, I pay. At least living in a village there is usually someone fairly local to tackle most jobs.

I tend to speed read posts and read yours as ‘cow damaged rear’😲then went back to read it properly, the difference a word makes.

I have DP and both my AC live nearby, also my Mum, but I’m the one helping all of them usually 😄of course if I did need help then they’d all chip in.

I am so blessed I have lovely family close by and dear friends - I lost my turn to 4 months ago, my D H ❤️

I asked this because a friend needed help which I was unable to give. Fortunately another friend was available.
It is all very well saying how independent we are but sometimes there are times when we urgently and seriously might need help. We need to have a Plan A, B and C.