Grandaughter does not want to visit me to her Grandfather .

Nothing...my wee grandaughter is 4 autistic,non verbal and with learning disabilities. I get no affection whatsoever and it hurts terribly but I just have to go with it as do you.Sorry if tgat sounds harsh but you cannot force her. Hooefully she will come tmround again plus she is a pre teen....

Nicolenet, that is a despicable thing to say! She has ADHD and is 10 years old. You obviously have no idea about children on 'the spectrum' it's not bad behaviour it's a condition. .educate yourself!

Katekeeprunning,I just said same thing... a despicable uneducated thing to say.....

This happens and will indeed probably blow over. But meanwhile my advice is to ask her what she would like to do with you two. Have a holiday break somewhere, or what my 14yrs old grandaughter wanted - a visit to a comic shop?

Our ND grandchild much prefers we take them out to coming to our home - if favourite food is on offer it helps a bit but if not going out they much prefer to be in their own home or one much more familiar to them. We live an hour away, other family are close by. Try not to worry suzieq. It’s worth trying to think of life from their viewpoint. What makes them happy, what doesn’t. We just try to support ever changing needs.

Katekeeprunning

Nicolenet

Ignore her, no treats or presents, no hugs or smiles. She isn't worth bothering. Happy New Year x

Harsh words

She’s ten for goodness sake, talk about a hanging judge.

Families can be awkward but what would we do without them.
Some of you may have read my message about visiting my son who lives in NZ despite his comment a few months back,
‘We want you dead’.

As I know this is definitely not my son and he did add that he shouldn’t have brought up the comment also he would kindly meet me at the airport but I have no idea how he intends to come.
Yesterday he mentioned, as the day before I arrive they will be in Auckland to celebrate a niece’s 21st then my DIL intends to drive back in their one car and take my granddaughter with them so have no idea how Nigel will get to the airport This now is making my visit awkward
While my DIL never speaks on the phone and now their daughter has become less affectionate.

Thank you for all the useful comments ... I will always be here for her ... I think I feel the loss as she has always been cute and sweet in past years ,,I will wait till she comes to us , and Im sure she will come around ,

Exactly , I have 4 who I lavished love on and half raised and it's like I now dont exist, my grandaughter got married ,a big wedding, everyone went except she didnt invite her grandpa and I, I really dont care about them anymore, it took a long time but I got there, karma will get them

Is there a way you could meet her with her parents on neutral ground, or in their home? If you are on her ground she may be more relaxed and then you could just behave as is normal to you and not raise the subject of why she is not visiting you for a while and just see if it eases in a while. focusing on her lack of visits will I think not improve things. Hope things improve

My granchildren range from 3 to 25 years old. They go through phases , they are busy with friends, bored because there is nothing to do at yours then work begins and time is hard to find. Have you tried arranging to take her out somewhere of her choice ?
ADHDcould affect her and will take time for her to accept. Give her time and keep messaging reminding her of your love.

Is she your Sons or Daughters child? If it's your Sons, how is your relationship with your daughter in law? Or your Son for that matter.

Sorry if this has already been asked, I did not read all the comments.

Wow! I don’t think that’s the answer at all.

@ Bucci were you referring to my reply?

As I've seen this happen a few times. Especially where the MIL and DIL don't get on.

So I only wondered if this could be the case.

A simple answer from Suzieque66 saying no problems there, that's all.

Sorry if I offended.

Thought that was a relevant question.

Nicolenet

Ignore her, no treats or presents, no hugs or smiles. She isn't worth bothering. Happy New Year x

Surely, you do not mean this seriously?

If you do: what a way to attempt to teach a child to show consideration to others!

My eldest granddaughter is 10, nearly 11 and while my daughter and her family visit me every week at the moment, I’m not sure how much longer this will continue. I’m sure it’s quite boring at my house for the 10 year old!