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80th birthday present inspiration- please

(69 Posts)
kittylester Thu 21-May-26 08:38:36

My lovely friend and neighbour is 80 next week. She is having a tea party in a village cafe.

The invitation says 'no presents - just the joy of your company'. But, she is the most generous person. She goes over the top with presents for others. She gave me flowers, chocolates and handcream for my last birthday which was not a big one.

Any ideas for her present?

Dontcallmelove Thu 21-May-26 08:50:48

If you know other people who are going, maybe club together and buy her a pair of theatre tickets or a couple of nights away? If that’s more than people want to pay, how about afternoon tea at somewhere nice? You can usually get some good discounts on experience websites.

Sago Thu 21-May-26 08:53:22

You could buy a beautiful notebook/journal and ask all the guests to write something about their friendship in the book.

J52 Thu 21-May-26 08:59:28

Rather than give her a present on the day, maybe a planter displaying a pot that could be delivered to her house from the local garden centre.
Something she could enjoy throughout the summer.

Oreo Thu 21-May-26 08:59:55

Maybe she has enough ‘stuff’ but chocolates or fancy teas and biscuits or a lovely plant would be appreciated?

J52 Thu 21-May-26 09:00:15

Plant display. Not planter displaying?

Visgir1 Thu 21-May-26 09:01:29

How about a Gardening gift card or Theatre gift card popped into her birthday card. I would like either, I'm also fond of a John Lewis gift card.

Naughtyneine Thu 21-May-26 09:06:23

What about something like CAFOD do whereby you buy a goat ( not literally of course) but your donation does and it's given to a person/family in the third world...donations also buy maternity services and items for schools.

Usedtobeblonde Thu 21-May-26 09:08:17

I agree about a lovely food that she wouldn’t buy for herself or if she enjoys a drink, as some of us oldies still do, some small bottles of good wine or fizz for her.
My friend who was recently 85 and also recently widowed loves a glass of red with her evening meal so I bought her 6 185cl bottles and she was thrilled.
I enjoy if someone buys me handmade chocolates, such a treat.

Calendargirl Thu 21-May-26 09:08:28

Just saying, but at 80, most people don’t want more ‘stuff’.

kittylester Thu 21-May-26 09:19:16

Which is why I was looking for suggestions.

A journal is a brilliant idea as she belongs to a writing group and has just published her life story.

A planter is a good one as well as she loves her garden and is always out there.

Not sure why we are such great friends- i neither write nor garden. We both like wine though.

Thank you for all the great ideas.

M0nica Thu 21-May-26 14:54:00

Calendargirl

Just saying, but at 80, most people don’t want more ‘stuff’.

Depends what the 'stuff' is. if its diamonds!!!!

Calendargirl Thu 21-May-26 16:14:36

MOnica

Exceptions to every rule, of course.

smile

Franbern Sat 23-May-26 09:02:46

I am just a few days short of my 85th birthday Having two 'parties', one for my extended family (being delayed to get past GCSE exam time - involving three of my younger g.children), and one for people I have become friends with locally thought the different groups I attend - this being held on my actual birthday.
My invites to both state very clearly No presents please, just your presence.

And, I really do mean that so would be a little upset if anyone chose to ignore my request and brought me any sort of gift.

I know some people actually suggest donations to a particular charity - I do not even do this. I really do want my celebrations to with the people I have invited and NOT involve any sort of gift.

harrigran Sat 23-May-26 09:40:24

I was given an unusual gift for my 80th birthday, it was a gold farthing with the year of my birth on the coin. The coin was made into a pendant and on a chain.

keepingquiet Sat 23-May-26 09:48:16

I give this message whenever I host a birthday party. It annoys me when people ignore my request.

Take her your company. It is the best gift you can give her. Every other thing you take says 'My company isn't enough, so here's some tat you don't want because I don't value your company enough.'

luluaugust Sat 23-May-26 10:01:47

I appreciate it is difficult as she has given you gifts but as she has specifically said no presents how about a really beautiful card, something special that could be kept if she wished I hope a happy time is had

Calendargirl Sat 23-May-26 10:06:16

I agree with keepingquiet

If people say, ‘no presents’, I assume that’s what they mean, otherwise why bother putting it on?

Also, I think it makes it uncomfortable for those who have adhered to the request and not bought an unwanted gift.

Stansgran Sat 23-May-26 11:05:57

I’ve just come out of hospital and been given lovely flowers but I’m on crutches so can’t take the flowers in and out of the kitchen to refresh. The thought is kind and those people won’t be visiting so they won’t see their generous gift drooping

NotSpaghetti Sat 23-May-26 11:36:32

My mother-in-law said "no presents" for her birthday but loved the pot of Local Honey she was given.

Previously she's enjoyed fancy jams.
I'd gift a store-cupboard "upmarket" treat - or better still, take her to a garden centre for an outing and pay for something she's drawn to.

keepingquiet Sat 23-May-26 13:08:34

Calendargirl

I agree with keepingquiet

If people say, ‘no presents’, I assume that’s what they mean, otherwise why bother putting it on?

Also, I think it makes it uncomfortable for those who have adhered to the request and not bought an unwanted gift.

I think it is a reflection on only valuing others by what they have and not who they are.

Daddima Sat 23-May-26 13:51:03

We thought we had cracked it when Auntie was 90, and said ‘no presents’, but there would be a box for donations to a charity. A good sum was collected, but people STILL brought gifts!

As Don’tcallmelove suggested, maybe invite her to lunch or afternoon tea where you pick up the bill?

Hatcham Sat 23-May-26 13:54:06

Subscription to Talking Pictures magazines?
talkingpicturestv.co.uk/

knspol Sat 23-May-26 13:58:04

I think if she's specified 'no gifts' then you should adhere to this. I understand your comments about how generous your friend is so maybe in a few weeks time you could take her out for a nice afternoon tea or a theatre visit?

OldFrill Sat 23-May-26 14:03:48

If she means "no gifts" then every gift this octogenarian receives means she'll be groaning inside whilst having to display fake pleasure. What a birthday treat for her.