Correspondence

Hi TwiceAsNice - if you know the man's address, perhaps you could write to him and ask him what he would like you to do with the letters.

Sorry, my message above ought to have been directed to hereshoping.

I was at the cinema watching the opening scenes of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel where a recently bereaved Judi Dench is speaking to someone on the phone and they are evidently saying "We can only talk to the account holder." meaning her late husband. I was surprised how loudly the audience laughed at this - but then they also laughed at the scene where Tom Wilkinson's former lover is walking into the river with his ashes. A very strange audience that day.

My husband has been dead almost twenty years. He ran a small business from home. I still get calls from tele sales people trying to sell office furniture, photocopier suppliers. I ask them where on earth they are buying their business data from for a company which (for any reason) hasn't traded in twenty years but they will never say. There is no residual reference to the company online. I still find the calls distressing.

It was many years ago since my father in law died. Professional magazines etc constantly arrived at the now empty house despite informing the companies. In the end I wrote a large ‘deceased’ in black indelible marker across them and ‘return to sender’ and shoved them in the pillar box. The message finally got through.

Whoops. Should always check grammar etc after amending/cutting and pasting. Sorry.

surely it's time we struck back.
the reason these carelessnesses happen is because it costs them so little to regurgitate the endless reams of bumph they send out. if we made it cost them customers to do it, they'd soon put some effort into stopping it from happening.
so please name-and-shame these companies.
don't protect them with bash'em n'diddle.
tell us all who they are so we can withdraw our patronage and write telling them why. it should only take a few incidents and all companies will soon pull their socks up.

After my step-mum died, I was dealing with her affairs and found one letter to her that began,
"Hello Smith Elizabeth!" (names have been changed). It was from some quite official organisation, on headed paper. They weren't this know she was dead, but should have known that she was a 95-year-old lady in a care home. I wrote back to them, informing them of her death, and also saying that this was a totally inappropriate salution with which to open a semi-formal letter to anyone, ever!

It is now almost 2 years since my husband died, but the other day a credit card statement arrived addressed to him, despite them being informed at the time of his death. I rang the bank`s customer services number, was put through to the bereavement department, told them why I was calling, and asked for no more correspondence addressed to my husband. I was asked if there was a will, I said yes, was I the executor? I said no, my daughter was, so then he said they need to speak to the executor before they can put a deceased notice on his credit card account. What the HELL does his will have to do with it? All they have to do is stop sending the statements out saying that £0.00 is owing!

Oh this is so awful. I’m upset and angry for you all.