Recent raw bereavement

That’s so terribly sad Rowantree. Please accept my condolences 💐

So incredibly sad Rowantree

So sorry Rowantree what a tragic situation for you all. Must be a great comfort to your daughter and granddaughter to know they have your love and support.

I hope this link will be of help. My heartfelt sympathy to you all.

www.gov.uk/bereavement-support-payment

So sorry for all the sadness and struggle you and your DD and DGD are going through

I am so sorry. Not many things are as shocking and distressing as a suicide. My own brother did it. Wishing you all strength

I’m so sorry rowantree. My condolences and love to you all. .

Little enough though it is I know from my professional life this organisation can provide both a helpful listening ear and informed support.

uksobs.com/

Please care for yourself too.

I am so sad having read your
Post. Such a tragic thing to happen, I send you all my sympathy and wish you strength for the future. 💐💐

Sincere condolences for your loss for you and your family .

I am terribly sorry to hear of this great and complicated loss.

It's good that your daughter has a mortgage free home and your support.

So very sad for all of you. I hope the benefits link that has been posted above will be helpful.

This is so sad for all of you, I'm so sorry.

Apart from the benefits link, you might want to take a look at this organisation

www.winstonswish.org.uk

Whilst they are primarily for emotional support, they may well be able to signpost you to other organisations you can access.

You sound like a lovely, supportive family and I hope in time, your very raw grief will lead to some peace and acceptance.

Rowantree, I am sorry for your loss.

Very loss for your loss....can your DD apply for PIP ? ...Can she apply for the widows benefit which is for parents with under 18s .....I don't think either of these benefits are means tested

Forgot to say....was there any deather in service lump sum from the dads work? Or any pension entitlement to next of kin?

Rowantree sorry for your daughter and granddaughter. And you seeing them in so much pain.

If you read the Losing my son thread there are ones who will understand what you are all going through. As they have gone through loved ones taking their own life.

I still grieve for my husband everyday and it's been 21.5 years . But my grief is different.

What a shock Rowantree how very sad for you all 🥀

I’m so terribly saddened and sorry for your loss. The pain and grief of those left behind is immense and I can only offer sincere condolences.

On a practical note could you daughter contact your local occupational health team? They may be able to help with adaptations to her home.

Your DGD may benefit from counselling.

Best wishes to you all x

I am so, so sorry about your son in law and for all of you.
May I advise you not to pay off the mortgage until you have expert, reliable advice.
Your daughter will find support on “Widowed and Young”.
Mumsnet have bereavement threads and you and your daughter will find practical and emotional support there.
The government have some financial support, not a great deal but their advisors will direct you to others.
The funeral director should be knowledgeable too.
There are several charities which give support after suicide.
If you have a local church or your GD has a school chaplain, there will be a compassionate listening ear. You do not have to be a committed Christian and every minister or priest I know is a good and confidential listener who has “heard it all”.

Hold your D and GD close.

I can't add anything to the good advice that you have been given here, Rowantree, but I couldn't not send you every good wish for better days to come. You and your family have had a terrible time, and are still in the early stages of grief.
Be kind to yourself so that you can carry on supporting your DD and DGD.

I’m so sorry for what you are all going through. I believe your daughter may be entitled to Bereavement Support Allowance . I know she wasn’t married to him but she has his daughter to support .
If I remember I got over £1000 lump sum and then approximately £100 a month for a year . It’s not a lot but worth applying for . I hope she gets some help for her child’s sake .

I share your pain. My DD very recently lost her husband to a sudden illness. Her children (primary school aged son and daughter) are heartbroken. I am at a loss as to how to help them. This is new territory for me as I my parents were around until I was middle aged. I live a distance away and their family support has always been the other grandparents. As you can imagine, they are in bits. They will be well provided for once pension and insurances are sorted but emotionally they are in uncharted territory. If anyone has advice, please share.

My heartfelt sympathies goes out to you all who are going through such heartbreaking times

Louisa they weren't married....also any bereavement grant wouldn't be applied because they separated a few months ago. We're finding doors slamming in our faces everywhere we look for help. I'm staying with them for a few days here and there, to help with basic stuff: she's struggling with washing and there are clothes everywhere. The house is tiny with little storage and that doesn't help keep on top of things. But now I've got a tooth infection and am in pain, so my OH insisted I come home and rest and go to an emergency dentist appointment tomorrow.
To make matters worse, the other granddad is expecting us to pay for most of his son's funeral ( he's offered to 'contribute '.). Somehow we'll need to talk to him about this. Our daughter and granddaughter will need our financial support for some time to come till she's on her feet ( if that ever happens). His sons debts are a huge worry and an unknown.