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Older Love

(112 Posts)
dorsetpennt Sun 26-May-13 10:02:29

I was on line in M and S food yesterday behind an elderly couple, probably in their late 70s. He was tall with a wonderful head of white hair, quite distinguished looking - she was very small maybe 5 foot 2 inches at the most with a sweet little face. She was trying to persuade him about something and was teasing him in a very flirty manner. At one stage she stroked his face then nestled into him, just like a young girl. All the time he was smiling with great fondness and cuddling back. It was a lovely scene. She saw me watching and smiled back at me - I commented that it was lovely to see them so happy. 'We've been married for 55 years' she replied.
It was lovely to see people of this age still so in love. However, it also made me sad as I've been on my own since my divorce in 1984, I brought up my children completely on my own. I would have so loved being like this couple.

Ella46 Sun 26-May-13 10:26:53

Me too Dorset, it's lovely to see though smile

Sel Sun 26-May-13 10:48:53

She didn't say if that 55 years was to each other dorset. They sound a bit iccy to me grin

whenim64 Sun 26-May-13 10:53:58

Lovely to see a couple happy in each other's company, Dorset smile

Marelli Sun 26-May-13 13:28:14

Lovely to see.....but if I nestled up to DH next to the 'Dine in for a Tenner' he'd be horrified! He'd probably think I was falling over and about to make an exhibition of myself grin!

Sbagran Sun 26-May-13 14:32:05

I think what you witnessed was wonderful Dorset - sadly very few marriages reach that milestone nowadays.
I am sure that if they are truthful they would both say that they have gone through rough patches but 'Give and Take' and coming through at the other end is the important bit.
DH and I have been married for nearly 36 years and if I had £1 for every rough moment or crisis I would be a very rich woman but we stuck together. Sadly DD is divorced having tried very hard to stick to her marriage vows so it isn't always possible.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would have been if our marriage had ended at one crisis or another but each time we worked at it and somehow got through.
flowers for all you Dorset and all those who haven't been so fortunate.

kittylester Sun 26-May-13 16:52:32

Marelli grin

PRINTMISS Sun 26-May-13 16:59:40

We have been married 61 years, and yesterday we met up with friends, sadly two of those had lost their other halves - one only last year, after sixy years of marriage, (the other cared for his wife for years before she finally passed away, they had been married for 50 years) the other two still married to each other and like us married in 1952, we have other friends who have all managed to stay married to each other for 55+ years, and another couple who are celebrating 65 years this year, and we regularly meet up and have a laugh - that's the recipe - good friends and laughter. Yes, there have been problems,- meeting up with friends we have known for more than 50 years means that we can talk about the past and understand what has happened, BUT no I would not cuddle up to my husband in the super-market, however, when we are laughing together in a group, we very often lean against each other, which our younger friends (yes we have a large group of those too) seem to find quite touching - where as really it is only habit, we might fall over!

Ariadne Sun 26-May-13 17:22:08

DH (to whom I have been married for nearly 48 years) wouldn't thank me for cuddling up in a food store, but then he wouldn't be in one with me anyway! Nevertheless, if a squeeze of the hand, or a smile would be enough for me, then a cuddle is what others do and that is fine. We show love in our own ways, don't we?

petallus Sun 26-May-13 17:35:36

I can't helping smiling to think that a couple of weeks ago, DH and I only just managed to avoid having a big row in a Waitrose queue.

Imagine the disgrace of being chucked out of a supermarket for causing a scene at our age! grin

We've managed to stick together through thick and thin for 46 years though it hasn't always been easy.

I wouldn't say we were 'in love' though there seems to be an intense and committed bond of some sort in spite of ourselves.

MrsJamJam Sun 26-May-13 18:09:03

dorset never give up hope, if that is what you truly want. I was divorced (not my choice) in 1975 and brought up my two boys on my own. Definitely not easy, but I'm pretty proud of how they have turned out. Ten years ago, so after a long time on my own, I met Mr JJ who came as a complete surprise, and here we are living in a completely new place and my life is utterly different from what I had assumed my future held.
I love him dearly, but we probably wouldn't be seen cuddling in the Waitrose queue!

Movedalot Sun 26-May-13 18:37:54

We have been married for 45 years and are happy to show affection anytime anywhere. Why not?

harrigran Sun 26-May-13 18:48:08

DH always holds my hand, that way he can drag me across the road when there is a gap in the traffic.

j08 Sun 26-May-13 18:52:06

We've been married fortysomething years (can't remember exactly at the mo). Last time I felt like snuggling up to him was in my early forties, a pre-menopausal thing. You know how women get "hot for it" at that age. I guess it's nature's last go at getting another child out of you.

I'm definitely not "in love". Like petallus I suppose I love him. And vice versa. Wouldn't want to be without him, and that must mean something. Whatever!

I think that couple sound weird!

We manage to avoid supermarket rows by not going shopping together.

j08 Sun 26-May-13 18:53:27

Oh God Harrigran! My DH just gets huimself over and lets me fend for myself!

Well, he does say "come on then" but I don't trust to that.

kittylester Sun 26-May-13 19:16:06

I stood behing aa couple in Sainsbury's who were being 'naggy' with each other. When it was my turn I said 'I though they were going to have a domestic' the cashier said that at least 50% of 'the old ones' argue! sad I don't take mine shopping!!

Flowerofthewest Sun 26-May-13 23:17:05

Harrigan grin

I must admit to being totally still very much in love with my DH. We do have niggles but I absolutely adore him and still fancy him after 34 years. We hold hands and I do give him a kiss now and then in public. Nothing too sloppy but if I feel like giving him a kiss I see no reason not too.

I think that couple sound delightful. They seem so much in love. Good on them!

Hunt Sun 26-May-13 23:32:10

57 years married-hope we make it to 60, and beyond. My tummy still gives a lurch when I see him walking down the road coming back from some project or other, I love him dearly. What would I do without him- he makes the endless cups of tea!

ps Sun 26-May-13 23:32:44

I just love to see it. I may be a sentimental old fool but I still remember the affectionate times I have had in the past so to see a couple in love and only having eyes for each other then that rates very highly in my book. Sadly my love was betrayed and has left me atouch scarred but I can still see the value of faithful love. Flower I applaud your honesty and hope you continue feeling as you do for your husband until eternity, It's good to hear and as for the couple in question - how nice is that, if only we were all blessed with a relationship as theirs. Something to aspire to perhaps? And why not!

HMHNanna Sun 26-May-13 23:38:03

I met my husband when I was twelve years old, and he was fourteen. We have been very happily married for forty two years. I would definitely give him a kiss and a cuddle in front of the family or anyone for that matter because I love him so much.

Joan Sun 26-May-13 23:51:00

I sense some terrific love stories on here. HMH yours in particular! 12 and 14!!! Sounds a bit like the couple in last Tango in Halifax, but they lost each other for 60 years, then met up via facebook. Maybe your story is their 'might-have-been.'smile

As for me - married 46 years and always hold hands in public. No kissing though!

harrigran Mon 27-May-13 00:31:45

I have been with DH since I was 17, we will celebrate 50 years together on July 1st. He has always been demonstrative but I tend not to encourage him when we are doing the shopping.

dorsetpennt Mon 27-May-13 09:04:35

JO8 trust you to think the couple were weird rather then in love! Have enjoyed all your comments. MrsJamJam thank you for your message about not giving up hope - I often joke by saying if I met anyone he'd have to be rich,old,one foot in the grave and the other on a banana skin with no family! However, it is only a joke, knowing me I'd fall for someone quite ordinary just as long as he can make me laugh and doesn't mind someone who loves walking and is a huge bookworm

AlieOxon Mon 27-May-13 09:49:05

I remember my (paternal) grandparents were like this. Met as teenagers, married at least 5 years later in 1904, sweethearts until the 1960s when she died..........lovely people.

Oldgreymare Mon 27-May-13 10:10:50

DH follows me around a super market like the albatross around the ancient mariners neck! He has a naturally loud voice and bombards me with questions and comments:
Why are you buying THAT?
Have you checked the freezer?
I'm sure we have loads of that already!
Do we really need that?
Don't forget I shan't need feeding this week!
Then, had the nerve to ask for a contribution from 'housekeeping' as I wouldn't need so much with him away.....
Needless to say I declined (politely) and am now enjoying the P&Q......