What weird phrases do you use?

In the supermarket the other day the checkout assistant asked how I was, it had been a very windy day and I said I feel as though I've been dragged through a hedge backwards and he replied I haven't heard that expression in years.

Angibi use that one all the time

Angibi, I use that one too! I cant think of any really daft ones i use right now, but no doubt I do.

I can think of a great many that my grandparents used, but I don't myself.

The 'dragged through a hedge backwards' one is well-known everywhere, I think.

I say "It's like Christmas Day in the workshop" which doesn't mean a thing to anyone else but me - it harks back to when I worked for Caterpillar when I was 19 and often had to go to the huge workshop to ask something or speak to someone on the shop floor, and invariably all the young mechanics would down tools and someone would shout "It's Christmas Day in the workshop" no matter that it was March, or June or any day but Christmas Day ? and we'd all laugh, me a bit shyly. So for me it means happy times and youthful fun.

Daft, I know. But I still say it.

My mother used to say to me " your cheaper to keep a week than a fortnight " I find myself saying this to family if they have splurged on something expensive.

you're even.

On very windy days, my dad used to say "it's windy enough to blow the teeth off a saw". I still smile when I think of it.

Mum used to say "Fanny's got 'er 'at on" if someone was voicing a strong opinion.

Hells bells and buckets of blood was used a lot in my neck of the woods in my youth.

I like that one nina. Can it be used for either gender as I have someone in mind!

When I complained about my plain looks, my mother used to say, "you'll pass in a crowd". It was no consolation though.
If Dad was going somewhere by himself (a rare occurrence) and we asked where he was going his reply was usually, "to the back of beyond, where they clog ducks".
When asked how long anything is going to take, I've been known to answer "as long as a piece of string".

If the wind was particularly strong my father used to call it a "lazy wind" - didn't go round you, went right through. If I ever asked how I looked before going out he would say "no-one's going to stop a galloping horse to look at you"

My granddaughter used to giggle when I said 'Well I'll go to the foot or our stairs'. I also use the 'hedge backwards' one and when I look in the mirror I sometimes say to DH 'I look like the wreck of the Hesperus' (can't spell that) or 'I look like Dracula's revenge'

foot OF our stairs I mean!

I am familiar with a few of the sayings above but have never heard "Fanny's got 'er 'at on" I love it ninathenana

When my eldest GD is being nosy (she is a bit of a gossip just like her lovely mum) I say "oh, I see, mrs Nosy couldn't come so she sent you then"

Me and the three DGC also have a weird saying where we compare things to Frogs. As in Crazy as a Frog, silly as a frog, happy as a frog etc. I can't remember how it came about, but apparently "Frog" is a very high scale of measurement .

I'v remembered by FIL saying "loppy lugs" because I have one SIL who always has to know everything that's going on. He also used to say about her "There's no show without Punch!"

If my Gran saw anyone who had bandy legs she would say " He couldn't stop a pig in an entry".

My dad used to say that someone could eat an apple through a tennis raquet if they had prominent front teeth.

I use 'Someone's got a bee in their bonnet' but prefer nina's version!

When asked where I'm going or where I've been I often say 'There and back to see how far it is'

Or if I'm 'idling' when I should be 'doing' then it's 'Well this won't knit the baby a new bonnet'

I can remember silencing someone (in confusion) with 'You can argue till the cows come home but it won't change anything'

'Sod that for a game of soldiers'

My great-granny would describe a short fat person as "easier to jump over than walk round"

when my mother was particularly frustrated by someone or something she use to mutter about it being as much use as Fred Karno's Army!

My grandma used to say 'Fred Carno's Circus'