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How to scare DH

(60 Posts)
Nannykay Sun 15-Jul-18 23:00:41

We sat in front of the tv this evening, watching outlander, I was munching on some grapes, one foot on the puff the other flopped on the floor, I was very comfy. So, I feel a tickle on my foot, the one on the floor, so I think, stupid fly, and wiggle my foot. Seconds later it tickles again so I wiggle, this goes on for a few minutes before I look down, I had just bitten into a juicy grape, so when I looked down and there was the biggest, blackest spider on my leg, I took a deep breath to scream and chocked on the juice !.

Poor hubby, frightened him to death, the sight of me hitting my leg with the cushion, and face going purple.

I’m not sure how it all got sorted, but sort it he did,

Strange thing is, I can know see the funny side, but he just keeps growling at me.

Outlander was good though

gmelon Mon 16-Jul-18 16:28:41

To add to my post about the bath full of spiders.
Upstairs in the same house there was a carpet of dead bees in every bedroom. We were crunching them underfoot.

Also a dead bird flat bang in the middle of the kitchen floor and another one in one of the back bedrooms. Laid out on a carpet of bees.

I felt like I was living the beginning of a horror film. You know the bit where the household gets a warning when they move in but foolishly dismiss it as nothing.

The actual reason was that the loft hatch had been left open and the bees came down from their nest up there and didn't find their way back. The birds come into the eaves and found their way down into the house.

The bees returned every year to nest, loft firmly shut now.

muddynails Mon 16-Jul-18 16:35:11

What about a bat you think has flown out of the house, then hearing that rubbery sound of bat wings and feel the draught of it flying by as it comes out from behind the curtains that are above your bed head once you have put out the light and settled down in bed. Visitors ask me why I keep a large childs fishing net in the corner of the bedroom.

gmelon Mon 16-Jul-18 16:44:34

Oh my goodness muddynails
I will never go to bed again.
You were terrified?

I would have been hysterical, running from the bedroom screaming.

sazz1 Mon 16-Jul-18 19:03:27

Always used to pick them up and put them outside until a big one bit my finger 3 times. It had fell from the loft when my sister threw down some carpet underlay so perhaps was angry at being disturbed. Anyway it felt like s wasp sting was just a bit red. Skin went hard and peeled but no ill effects. Didn't realise they could bite before this.

lesley4357 Mon 16-Jul-18 20:36:08

Never understand why people are scared of spiders. Unless you live where there are poisonous ones, what possible harm can they do you?

grannydarkhair Mon 16-Jul-18 22:12:19

I also do the glass/postcard thing. There was a fairly big spider on my bedroom ceiling the other night. Before I had a chance to fetch a set of steps, it leapt/fell from the ceiling. Even though it wasn't coming in my direction, I haven't moved as quickly as that in a while. Once my heart rate steadied, I had a look for it, unfortunately to no avail. No doubt, it will re-appear, probably when I'm once again in my bed.

Nannykay
I, too, am an Outlander fan. However, I much prefer the books to the Starz series, even given the good looks of most of the cast ( I'm a big Roger fan). I love that so many of the cast are actually Scottish.

This is my first post since I joined Gransnet, hello to you all. I wish I'd found it earlier, I really enjoy my daily emails, etc.

blueskies Mon 16-Jul-18 22:13:54

We had large Pacific cockroaches when we were livaboards on a boat. Home again and in bed I felt a large crunchy thing against my toe. So disgusting I leapt out of bed. It was half a digestive biscuit.

muddynails Tue 17-Jul-18 07:21:20

gmelon, Where did all those spiders in the bath come from, I hope you keep a brick on the plug when you are in the bath! sounds like a sequel to "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" to me.

muddynails Tue 17-Jul-18 07:23:09

blueskies, that gave me my first chuckle of the morning.

BPJ Tue 17-Jul-18 09:41:50

I don't know about other DH's but herself can scare me by using one of two very small words with VERY many connotations OH! or AHH!

Bagatelle Tue 17-Jul-18 09:43:12

The cat deals with them for me. Unfortunately they sometimes make him sick; I think he should kill them before he eats them.

Diana54 Tue 17-Jul-18 10:11:54

Spiders landing on your leg is not funny for any of us but ones that run around I had a secret weapon. A terrier, she was a demon, any insect, spiders no problem, chew them and spit them out. She'd catch insects in flight too including Wasps and Bees but never did get stung we gave up trying to stop her in the end.

Daftnan Tue 17-Jul-18 10:12:50

Never mind the spider! Isn't Outlander good? I've read all of the books and am now watching it on tv. Can't go past any large stones without doing my best to go back in time and find Jamie!!!

gmelon Tue 17-Jul-18 11:19:25

muddynails Tue 17-Jul-18 07:21:20
gmelon, Where did all those spiders in the bath come from, I hope you keep a brick on the plug when you are in the bath!

I haven't the faintest idea why there were so many.

Mass suicide? Joined a cult that brainwashed spiders?

A new bath was in there pronto.

gmelon Tue 17-Jul-18 11:28:50

muddynails
What about a bat you think has flown out of the house, then hearing that rubbery sound of bat wings and feel the draught of it flying by as it comes out from behind the curtains that are above your bed head once you have put out the light and settled down in bed.

This abov has done for me sleeping wise.
I couldn't sleep last night thinking about your bat, I kept thinking how you shut the window and it was still in your bedroom, lurking in your dressing gown.

gmelon Tue 17-Jul-18 11:29:25

*above

muddynails Tue 17-Jul-18 11:59:43

gmelon, My one bat, not as bad as friend who moved into house and took balloon things out of the chimneys (old house, fireplaces in the bedrooms) and was woken in the night by weird sound and when they put on the light was (she said) at least a dozen bats swooping around the room. As for your spiders, think there must have been a surfeit of flies/bees they could hear buzzing so they marched up the piping en mass thinking it was new spider restaurant opened.

kathsue Tue 17-Jul-18 12:28:00

I was sitting in bed reading one night. I'd just got to the part where a woman was backed into a corner by a dangerous man and she went for him with a poker when something buzzed in my ear. I batted it away with my left hand, threw the book at it with my right and half jumped out of bed. The book ended up on the chest of drawers in the corner and the fly on the floor stunned. I finished it off with a slipper.
I don't usually kill flies or spiders but this one attacked me at exactly the wrong moment.

jura2 Tue 17-Jul-18 15:30:53

never understood why people are so afraid of spiders ... they are such useful animals. Ours are all called 'Fred' and live very long lives.

lemongrove Tue 17-Jul-18 15:47:59

Funny that you posted that Nannykay as just last night I had to deal with the first ‘of the season’ a big brown spider with huge legs, hiding under the dresser ( it came out for a stroll about 10pm) it’s early for them to be out and about so boldly, normally August onwards! Shudder.

lemongrove Tue 17-Jul-18 15:54:01

gmelon I may be having nightmares after reading your posts.?

blueskies grin that will teach you to eat biccies in bed!

Tweedle24 Tue 17-Jul-18 16:07:47

Leslie 4357. Arachnophobia is a phobia. There is no logic to it. The fact that the spiders living in the UK are largely harmless does not make a scrap of difference.
I am not scared of spiders but I do sympathise. I have a snake phobia (that includes slow worms, although they are lizards, not snakes), I have cats who bring them indoors and when bored with them, leave them for me to find. Luckily, I have patient, long-suffering neighbours who ‘rescue’ me from them..

gmelon Tue 17-Jul-18 16:37:53

Muddynails
My one bat, not as bad as friend who moved into house and took balloon things out of the chimneys (old house, fireplaces in the bedrooms) and was woken in the night by weird sound and when they put on the light was (she said) at least a dozen bats swooping around the room

Ummm...... this house has fireplaces in all the rooms including bedrooms. All bar one are out of use and each have a balloon up there.
Oh dear. grin

think there must have been a surfeit of flies/bees they could hear buzzing so they marched up the piping en mass thinking it was new spider restaurant opened
They were tempted in by our carpets of bees. Your may be right.

gmelon Tue 17-Jul-18 16:38:50

When it's really windy the fireplaces make weird noises.

Chewbacca Tue 17-Jul-18 17:16:36

Spiders are welcome in this house at any time of year. Moths are my nemesis. Utterly terrified of them and can't be in the same room as them.